In your experience...

[chloe40]

Has bereavement counselling and therapy helped you through grief or have you/did you find

another form of support.

Sending love

Chloe

[Skyp]

Hi chloe. I didn't have councelling. I find the support on this forum helps xx

[chloe40 Administrator in reply to Skyp]

Hi Skyp

Thank you!

How are you doing?

Chloe <3

[Skyp in reply to chloe40]

Hi chloe I'm ok. Some days worse then others. Just try to take each day as it comes. Hope you are ok xx

[chloe40 Administrator in reply to Skyp]

Hi Skyp

Yes, I'm fine thanks.

You're doing absolutely the right thing Skp, <3

Chloe

[Sandradsn]

I didnt have counselling but looking back I think I should of.It was the start of the 1st lockdown so difficult times.This site is helpful though,knowing others are having the same feelings x

[chloe40 Administrator in reply to Sandradsn]

Hi Sandra,

Your loss couldn't have been a more difficult time for you, so I totally understand.

I'm pleased you find us a little support, it is helpful to read others posts {{{hugs}}}

<3

[GoGo_JoJo]

I had some counselling after my Dad died, not specifically of the "bereavement" variety but it definitely helped 👍🏻

[chloe40 Administrator in reply to GoGo_JoJo]

Really glad to know that GoGo_JoJo

How's life treating you? busy as ever I imagine.

Chloe

[GoGo_JoJo in reply to chloe40]

Keeping busy yes thanks Chloe! Sea swimming, running, workouts plus actual "work" too! 🤣 hope you're feeling better now x

[Lperica10]

yes it definitely helped me. However I did find the therapist a little judgement because my dads death was liver disease due to alcoholism. But that was how I interpreted it.

[GoGo_JoJo in reply to Lperica10]

I think we can definitely feel that way until we learn to let go of the automatic defence mechanism that we learn growing up. Once we realise that their decisions were always their decisions and we had little to no impact on those decisions it's easier to stop feeling defensive, and judged.

[chloe40 Administrator in reply to GoGo_JoJo]

Hi GoGo_JoJo

It's good to read your post, thank you!

Chloe x

[Lperica10 in reply to GoGo_JoJo]

ya she definitely took a more approach of he did this to himself when dealing with my grief. I didn’t like that. (She was my therapist in the past too before his death and knew a lot of what went on too though) I just think when grieving it didn’t matter the cause or the past. I was grieving

[chloe40 Administrator in reply to Lperica10]

Yes, absolutely agree! <3

Chloe

[GoGo_JoJo in reply to Lperica10]

🤔 it can help if you were blaming yourself. I dealt with most of that well before my mother drank herself to death fortunately.

Grieving is so varied. Sometimes we are hardly grieving the person themselves, especially when addiction is in the mix, but the person, especially a parent, we thought they were as children or for what might have been. Never an easy way through. 💞

[chloe40 Administrator in reply to Lperica10]

Hi Lperica10

Hmm.. that's not very professional. Grief is grief not matter what the cause of death, so sorry you experienced that <3

Chloe

[Lperica10 in reply to chloe40]

yes!

[Caza]

morning Chloe. Hope your feeling better now & have fully recovered.

I was never offered counselling & never looked into it for myself. For me I think it would of made me far worse at that time. I have never spoken about the details of my daughter’s death, way too painful not even with her dad. I know some people will think that unhealthy. Just know myself & it would make me worse.

[chloe40 Administrator in reply to Caza]

Morning Caza

I'm fine thank you, feeling proud of myself for getting through this, thanks for asking ❤️

Only you can be the judge and I appreciate different circumstances have different views of counselling, it doesn't help everyone.

Chloe x

[kenster1 Volunteer]

second time around far better than the first but maybe the first time my emotions where still very raw for it to kick in but it`s important to get that help.

[chloe40 Administrator in reply to kenster1]

Absolutely agree Kenny!

Glad you had a positive experience second time around <3

[Lizzy-m]

Hi I had my first session of counselling on Friday. I've been so down, depressed and miserable since. Is this normal ? I lost my hubby in September 3 weeks after diagnosis. The sessions are held at the same Hospice where he passed away, it took me all my strength to actually go into the building. I have another session booked in 2 weeks. Will o feel this bad after each one, if so, I can't carry on. ANY ADVICE would really be appreciated. I just don't know how to move forward 😞. Sending Love x

[Hidden in reply to Lizzy-m]

Hi,

My sincere condolences on your loss. I briefly saw the hospice social worker. She said that grief is like a rock you carry around in your pocket. Some days it's a boulder (unbearable weight and pain), while other days it's much smaller (bearable weight and pain).

I lost my mom last August. My grief waxes and wanes from moment to moment even. I had a small moment yesterday where I was hit with a tidal wave of grief and started crying. An hour later I was laughing with my husband and thinking of something else.

I made a "home" for mom. It's on my desk at home. It has some pictures of her. I have also been writing her a letter telling her what I remember from our times together. It's helped so much to have it written down.

Give it some time. This September is so recent. Hugs to you!

[Lizzy-m in reply to Hidden]

Thank you for taking the time to reply, I think I'm expecting too much too soon. Sending hugs right back xx

[Hidden in reply to Lizzy-m]

You're welcome. Grief takes as long as it takes. It is a very individual process.

[Hidden]

Hi. I'm new to this community. I'll introduce myself in a separate post but saw this first and wanted to comment. My mom passed last August. I haven't been to any grief groups. I am part of the PTSD group here, though, and that's been helping a whole lot.

[Lizzy-m]

I'm new also. X