Too much loss

[Ruby1973]

On 21st January I lost my dad, aged 77, due to covid. Though he was actually admitted to hospital for something else and caught Covid there and wasn’t strong enough to fight it. We only had his funeral a couple of weeks ago, it’s been hard. On Friday 19th March we now lost a close Aunt suddenly, aged 78, she wasn’t ill so it’s a shock and a lot to deal with after losing my Dad. I don’t know how to cope.

[Greyone]

Hello Ruby1973.

I am deeply sorry that you have to suffer two losses and such a difficult time. It is so difficult to grieve with others under such constraints. You say 'we' so i hope you have other family members to talk to and maybe your household have been able to offer some comfort. If not then my heart truly goes out to you.

Maybe when the lockdown has eased enough you could all gather to share your grief in better circumstances, shed a few tears and share good time with you Dad and Aunt.

I am sure other members will be by soon to offer their support. So take heart from all that is offered and let us know soon how you are getting on. Good Luck

[KT22]

So sorry to hear that you have suffered two losses in such a short time. The current restrictions don’t help either as you can’t get much needed support & hugs. I do hope you have a good “bubble” that can offer you comfort at this incredible difficult time. Talk to your Dad & Aunt they will be watching over you.

Sending a big virtual hug xxx

[kvolm2016]

Hi Ruby, I just wanted to add my condolences for these losses. That is so difficult to experience the loss of your aunt when you had not even yet grieved and processed the loss of your dad. That is definitely a lot! I'm glad to hear that you were able to have a service for your dad. Was that helpful in being able to share some of your grief with others who also loved your dad? Sometimes knowing that we are not alone but we are experiencing a shared loss can be helpful. And being able to talk with others about your dad can also provide some relief. Are you getting to do this with anyone?

[Ruby1973 in reply to kvolm2016]

We were limited to only 20 at the service and not allowed a wake afterwards. We hope to celebrate his life later in the year when gatherings allowed. I do have the support of family but they are grieving too

[kvolm2016 in reply to Ruby1973]

Yes, of course they are and shared grief can be helpful but also not enough to get you through the process of grieving. Since so many of us have experienced loss in this past year, I found this article to be very helpful as it explains grieving under these circumstances: bit.ly/2P97unR Maybe this will be helpful for you too.

[socratesanne]

So sorry for you loss so close together, in particular. It is so hard to lose a loved one and two makes it compounded. I find talking about the loved ones and asking those who knew them to tell them what they remember. People often do not know what to say but this gives them a way to share their memories and fill your heart with their joys.