Have you made a friend through grief?

[chloe40]

One that you've been able to stay in contact with during and since.

Chloe

[kenster1 Volunteer]

I knew this guy I volunteered with he was ok in the beginning but we supported football teams of the opposite side of the city in Glasgow.we got on though and he was a hard worker suddenly he stopped working with us and we thought he had fallen off the waggon as it turned out he had stage 4 cancer and only had a couple of months to live.his friend had also started volunteering but we volunteered in different days mostly so never really knew him that well.he knew I respected his friend and filled me in with his health till the end.out of 25 volunteers only me another friend and his friend turned up and he was proud that we did.we exchanged numbers and kept in touch after I started working and started meeting up for a few games of pool now im back volunteering in the same place and we even work beside each other so that's how our friendship started and he supported me when my dad became ill and after his passing.

[chloe40 Administrator in reply to kenster1]

Kenny kenster1

Well, how lovely that you found a friend in the most difficult of circumstances. It's particularly nice that you both were friends with someone who shared your volunteering work but sadly suffered himself. To go on from there and support each other is inspiring Kenny, thanks so much for sharing this.

Chloe

[Greyone]

I can say yes to that. I used another forum for support during and after the last few years of my mother's life. It was indispensable. After my mother died I was delighted to get a message from someone who used the same forums to continue our conversations virtually on a weekly basis as pen friends.

We talk about our past week, our emotional ups and downs and exchange photos of what we do, our gardens and holidays.

[chloe40 Administrator in reply to Greyone]

That's so nice Greyone

We find friends in the most unlikely circumstances and often they turn out to be the best friendships as you've found. Must be lovely to have that to look forward to each week x

Chloe

[Greyone in reply to chloe40]

Its , but what is rather spooky is that we both sometimes wonder if the other wants to give up Despite the fact that we both say very strongly that we do. Im not sure what part truth and trust play in this kind of arrangement but I feel I can be truthful since I do know I won't be judged. She lost her dad about the same time as I lost my mum.

[chloe40 Administrator in reply to Greyone]

To be able to trust someone and not be judged is worth so much Greyone I'd cherish it and enjoy the friendship for what it is <3

Chloe

[kenster1 Volunteer]

yeah he stated a couple of months before me so he was nearly 2 years volunteering with the charity.it was shortly after we moved to another depot that he died I didn't want all his hard work to go unnoticed and forgotten so we got decking made with flower pots and two benches in his memory.he loved formula 1 so one of the benches has a racing car screwed on to it that was the last we could do.

[chloe40 Administrator in reply to kenster1]

That's so thoughtful Kenny, really kind of you both and such a wonderful way to remember him.

Chloe

[klr31]

No, but I lost a friend who suddenly dropped me for a reason I'm still in the dark about. So sad and hurtful, especially at a time of grief.

Karen

[kenster1 Volunteer in reply to klr31]

hi sorry to hear that one suffering is enough friends stick by each other usually when its grief so it really is sad.maybe they don't understand grief and find it hard to offer support.

[chloe40 Administrator in reply to kenster1]

Like to think that's the case Kenny kenster1

Chloe

[chloe40 Administrator in reply to klr31]

Really sorry to hear that Karen, that's awful!

It happens I know, sometimes it's just because they are embarrassed and don't know what to say, I like to think that's the reason anyway, any other would be cruel. I feel she couldn't have been a true friend Karen as she'd just have been there for you with a huge {{{hug}}}

Chloe