Hi everyone,
I'm new to this community.
I lost my father to covid-19 in March this year. This whole time i was so set in survival mode, i could barely get a chance to fully understand what it meant to lose him.
As the world around me moves on, i find it harder and harder to connect with the people i love and to open up to them.
I hope it would be easy to talk here with people who are facing similar situations.
Hi goldenfleece Welcome to our friendly community.
So sorry for the loss of your dear Father in such sad circumstances.
It is very difficult for us to comprehend close loss, it never seems to make sense why it should have happened, so outsiders never really know what we’re going through.
It will take time as you’re experiencing, but you can feel free to chat with us freely, we have and are going through the same.
I’m sure you’ll soon hear from others too.
Always here for you.
Chloe
I remember that feeling well. It’s like the world is moving on but you just want it to stop. Try talking to your loved ones, I know you said that you can’t connect with them however they might be feeling the same as you. Such early days for you. Look after yourself x
I do hope they feel it. But I see people around me joking about covid , annoyed by the health regulations and I can’t seem to say out loud how hurt it makes me feel .
I totally understand what you’re saying. If I’m with people now that talk about a subject that makes me uncomfortable I just say let’s not talk about this & change the subject. If it’s coming from people who I don’t know, in a shop or an office etc… I’ll remove myself. If it’s newspapers I won’t read them but this takes place over time. Guessing you wouldn’t want these people to feel the pain that your in. This is the only way that they’d truly understand. Take care x
Welcome to this community. I understand your pain and grief. I lost my daughter in January and have found the grief process excruciating.
Yes a feeling of isolation is something I’ve had to deal with. It appears to be part of the struggle. But you’re not alone here. Feel free to post your feelings. We all get it.
I’m a member of a Zoom bereavement group that meets weekly and have found it extremely helpful. Maybe you can find one (if you’re not using that resource already). I found it through a hospice site.
Grief is a weight I don’t want to carry but it is part of me now. I lost both parents and will always be a grieving daughter. I find the more acceptance I have the more at peace I am.
I’m so sorry for your loss.
I’m so sorry for your loss
When all this happened , covid was at its peak and between juggling the safety of my family and dealing with the fallout , I couldn’t meet or find any such groups . This is actually my first attempt at trying to let out my feelings slowly
I feel much more comfortable writing about things than speaking about them and it is healing to see so many kind people here
Use whatever resource is comfortable for you. The main thing I have found is to share my feelings. I can’t live alone with my grief. But I need people who understand and accept that I’m hurting.
A lot of regular people don’t understand. That’s why this group is so important.
If writing out your feelings works for you, please use us here. The pain is too much to carry alone.
Keep posting about your journey.
Once again. I’m sorry for your loss. And even that phrase sometimes makes me angry. Words that people say often annoy me. It’s like words are inadequate sometimes. But I know people mean we’ll in their responses. “They’re in a better place.” Etc. Makes me want to scream.
Maybe the loved ones are in a better place but they’re not here. And that’s what I want. Anger is part of my process that I acknowledge and share. I want my daughter back. And that’s not going to happen. It makes me angry that she died.
But those are just some of the emotions I need to share. Hope you keep posting. Private message me anytime. I’m here for you.
Ohh I felt this … each word I felt xxx
I had this said to me as well, LilyAnne a friend phoned me not long after my daughter had died & said it must give me comfort to know that my daughter was with God now & in a better place. NOOOO it absolutely didn’t I didn’t want my daughter with my friends God I wanted her here with me. We didn’t remain friends.
In my grief group we talk about how certain people in our lives were weeded out. If someone can’t handle my grieving they’re gone.
sorry for your loss god bless your dearest dad.glad your on this great little community and sure hope it helps.take care and god bless.
Hello Golden Fleece, so sorry about your loss, I lost my dad at end of august due to covid and I couldn’t attend the funeral as he was abroad. I thought I was the strongest one out of all the family but after a difficult week or two I am just overcome with emotions. I want to see him again and it hurts.
Initially I was praying a lot and not crying much but now it’s kicked in - he’s not around anymore and everyone going back to normal. I know it hurts don’t know what to say to you to
Make you feel better apart from
The fact I understand. I am 34 mum of 3 to 9, 7 and 18 months. Do you have family around you?
Sorry for your loss Adheela. People and life going back to normal sucks. Because of the new normal for us. Things are never going to be “normal” in the same way.
I am staying abroad and trying to get my family here as well . But as of now I’m aloneWhile I was with my family , I was so busy dealing with the situations , I couldn’t spare a moment for my feelings . I’m the eldest sister and I took it upon me to be the strongest for them.
I hope you are okay too . I hope you’re healing too. I hope you have people around you to rely on .. and I’m sorry for your loss
Well hopefully won’t be long until they come, it will take time I don’t know about u but personally I find when I am alone at night I tend to just feel overwhelming sadness and just cry. I had been keeping myself busy with Work and children - handed in my notice and now am thinking a lot more about dad now. Dad was mostly in Pakistan enjoying retirement and we had only seen him in November last year stayed for 2 months and went back. I went on holiday there in March and stayed with him for 2 weeks but he was mostly doing his own thing really - I had never thought I should spend more time with dad. I am the same I am the eldest they look up to you and I almost feel guilty as I wasn’t emotional as they were - I had to be strong too …. Sending lots of love…. Reply back if you feel it helps xxxx
I'm sorry for your pain and I know how much you miss your dad. I think we run robotically on adrenaline as we go through the " duties" required for legal closure of the death. When the bulk of that is done we look and say what the hell just happened. That's when I think more emotional unbalance sets in. I've lost many family and friends and I've found this to be true.
People will be very attentive to our loss for a short time and then they do move on. Our world has been flipped upside down and now they are talking about the new dress they bought. So tough to handle.
All of us here know exactly what you are talking about. If writing helps you, continue to do it.
🐬
Trying to work through it
Grief not once, but twice and so heart breaking.
