I miss her

[Gabriela07]

In two days it will be two months since my best friend committed suicide, I have friends who dream of her, but I do not, lately I finally started to dream and I want to dream about her, to tell her that I miss her, it makes me envious the others talk to her and hug her.

Most do not know why she did it but I did, I tried to help her, but my biggest effort was not enough or maybe I could have done more.

Everything reminds me in a certain way to her and I do not know what to do, thanks for reading, I do not know who I can talk to, I do not want to worry anyone and saying everything she told me is like a betrayal to her and her memory, talking everything is as if I did not respect it.

[chloe40 Administrator]

Hello Gabriela07

Welcome to our friendly Community.

Words cannot express just how sorry I am for the loss of your dear friend. Even though you may have known what was worrying her, you could never have known the outcome and you can't hold yourself responsible, even though you feel so bad about it. I can understand that you feel it would be a betrayal to discuss it and respect that but hopefully you will feel you can discuss it with a bereavement Counsellor or therapist at some point as I feel you will be overwhelmed if you don't. We also have other resources that may be of help to you, so please have a look on the right hand side of this page.

Regarding dreaming about your friend, that doesn't make it any easy to cope with, especially when you wake and realise it was a dream, you will be no nearer the truth but I do understand that you feel it would bring you closer to her.

We're always here for you Gabriela {{{hugs}}}

Chloe x

[kenster1 Volunteer]

hi I am really sorry to hear of your dear friends passing.i am sure as a friend you done all that you could to help them.please don't be blaming or questioning yourself its not your fault.ive had a few friends pass over the years and I dream of them time to time think its just a natural way for all of us when we lose someone.sure your dear friend would actually be proud of you that you helped her in difficult times. cherish the happier times more rather than the harder times it reall will help you.have you sought out counselling yet or spoke to anyone of how you feel.talking things over really is the best way to cope with things.god bless and take care.

[Hidden]

Hello Gabriela07 ,

I am so sorry to hear that your dear friend passed away so tragically such a short time ago.

It sounds like you were there for your friend as much as you possibly could, as anyone could. You are not responsible for your friend's suicide Gabriela07. You really are not to blame. Grief brings with it so many different emotions, one of which can be guilt. Please continue to reach out as you are doing now. You are so brave. I think it may help for you to talk to someone about your feelings, a grief counsellor or someone similar. It is so important that you do not bottle your feelings up. We are always here to support you in any way we can, take care,

Lottie x