Hi I have just come on this site for the first time and thought I had better introduce myself.

I have suffered from depression/anxiety for many years and been on ad's for past 5 years. I am in my late 50's. I don't have a partner or kids so I often feel lonely.

I was sacked from my last job 3 years ago for illness and I can't get another one. I am trying (not very sucessfully) to live on Job Seekers Allowance. They are putting a lot of pressure on me fo find work but I can't which is causing me a lot of anxiety and depression. When I lost my job I signed off sick with depression but after only 6 weeks ATOS wanted me to attend an assessment. I couldn't cope with the thought of it or the journey (way out in the wilds - 2 buses, a train and long walk) so I went on JSA instead.

I have 3 sisters and my mother is in a home.

Bev x

[John12]

Sorry to hear this I suffer bad anxiety I always think I am dieing and stuff and a lot of weird physical symptoms hopefully ul get better soon x

[Cloudy146]

Hi Bev ,

You are not alone , there are many around you who suffer in silence . It must be very hard for you at times and the important thing is to take little steps ,

I have suffered from depression for many years and was well until jan when the dark dog came back with avenge nance .

I am due back at my work today and getting more and more stressed . keep posting and try a little step today ,

Sending you a big hug x

[Hidden in reply to Cloudy146]

Thank you Cloudy. Big hug received and feels lovely. Sending you one in return ((((Cloudy)))).

Good luck back at work.

Bev x

[Chopper1975]

Hello Bev. Welcome to the site. It sounds like you've had a hard time of late. You're in good company on this site - its full of wonderful people, many who are in the same boat as you. You certainly don't have to suffer in silence. It's always good to get things off your chest and be honest. You'll certainly get support here.

It must be tough for you having the pressure of getting a new job. Many people don't understand the restraints depression and anxiety puts on a person. So we can end up in a vicious circle. It is a shame.

Keep chatting on here and stay strong Bev.

[Hidden in reply to Chopper1975]

Thank you so much Chopper thats lovely. I can already see there are some great people on this site. Will definately keep chatting on here - you will all be sick of me

Bev x

[Hidden]

Hey Bev,

Welcome to the site, at least you can vent your feelings on here.

It's sad they put pressure on you to find work, and they know full well there aren't many suitable jobs out there.

I am 65 and retired a long time ago, but I had problems because I only worked part time just before retiring.

Good luck

[Hidden]

Welcome

Good name Bev to start with , I am whywhy on here , but have the same name as you

You shouldnt have to put up with this & I no how you feel

I am in my 50's just lol suffered with anxiety most of my life more or less & wouldnt be able to hold a job down

I can also understand how you must be struggling on the money & the pressure you feel under from Atos etc

You need to get support , I no you live a way from where GP etc may be , but you need to get support from them , CAB , it may be a struggle , to start with , getting to see these people but in the long run it will be the best thing , your GP could back you up & CAB could give you all the advise you need with jobseekers & money advice

You could try phoning CAB , & GP , see if you can get home visits , again I no its not easy , but people will support you on here while you go through this

Once you get this sorted you can start concerntrating on yourself more & how to deal with living with anxiety

Let us no how you go on

Love

whywhy

xxx

[Hidden]

Thank you for your answer whywhy. There is no more support for me. I am already on anti-depressants and something to help me sleep. The CAB here is very part-time and overwhelmed with people seeking help. I used to work for the Department of Work and Pensions so I know the system and I get all the help available to me. If I was a pensioner I could get a lot more help! I get Job Seekers Allowance and lower rate DLA for depression. Oh and council tax rebate. I own my own home no mortgage so I don't need housing benefit. Thats it I'm afraid. I do currently get some money off my fuel bills but I won't qualify when they change the rules later this year.

I did claim ESA when I was sacked for depression/stress/anxiety. But after 6 weeks ATOS sent me an appointment. I couldn't cope with it all and a journey with 2 buses, 1 train and a long walk to get there so I signed on JSA instead. I also have asthma and mild COPD so it is hard to get another job. I have been out of work for 3 years now and can't get my pension until 65 because of the changes.

Thanks for your advice anyway. Its nice to meet another Bev

Bev x

[Hidden]

Omg! Have repeated myself. Sorry. Can't be bothered to change it!

[seyi]

Hi Hypercat

Hello my name is Seyi and welcome to the site i am fairly new here but it helps as everyone is going through the same. Panic attacks. Depression, Anxiety but its nice to know you have someone to talk with that can relate to each and everyone's condition. I have terrible panic attacks and anxiety and have been off work now for eight weeks at first the company was putting pressure on me to come back part time. But like yourself i have to use London Transport and thought i am not able to do this.

Trying to get people to understand is my biggest issue they have no idea what the smallest tasks mean and they take things for granted.

I really hope you can make some good friends here.

Take care Love Seyi xxx

[Hidden]

Thanks for your reply Seyi its very kind of you. I live in Devon and I worked for the DWP here not London. Though I did live in London for about 20 years. I don't suffer from panic attacks now though I did have a few years ago. And I never had a problem using London Transport (apart from the usual ones like crime etc.).

My anxiety usually comes from feeling under pressure either in my social life or working life. Or when my low self esteem kicks in which is when I also suffer from depression and stress. Then everything becomes impossible - people and work. When I am forced to perform under those circumstances I have an emotional freak out and end up crying and shaking. I did that quite a lot when I was working. Or I internalise it and end up wound tighter than a spring. Thats when I think things like whats the point in going on and I have had enough and want out.

But you are right - others don't understand - they just get impatient and annoyed. I have lost count of how many times I have been lectured or told off then. Which just makes it worse doesn't it?

I already think there are some great people here yourself included!

What part of London do you live? I spent most of it in Hackney.

Good luck with your work Seyi. Let me know how you get on.

Bev x

[lorianxiety]

hello Bev,my heart went out to you when I read your intro,its bad enough coping from day to day but to have to deal with Dhss and Atos assessments that's intimidating--couldn't blame you for opting out..are your sisters given you some support.And have you tried citizens advice,nothing is easy when you suffer fromAnxiety/depression -I don't think many people can comprehend just how debilitating it actually is,and neither did I until recently though have had lots of low points in my life and being a lot older than yourself -not that it matters really.but I dint know what anxiety was how difficult it is to shake off and a lousy gp to boot.im up in Scotland are you down south somewhere please respond as ive no family my sisters are older and live in Dundee,take care Loretta