Merry Christmas Everyone.
I was walking to my lunch today in the awful rainy weather that is apparently Christmas day in London and I was thinking 'why did I get out of bed for this'. Very depressing thought for Christmas day I will admit. But then I started thinking; wow its amazing I actually got out of bed today... which led me to think, WOW I have kept going and getting out of bed every morning. Now while some people would read that and think 'duh, you have to get out of bed each morning'. The long and short of it is that NO, we don't have to get out of bed every morning and NO we don't have to continue our normal lives everyday BUT WE CHOOSE TO KEEP GOING!
All of us here know the feelings of pure fear, feeling like every step could be the worst or our last, the feeling of terror, depression, dismay, hopelessness and even worse. Each of us have days when our first waking thought/feeling is fear and our last conscious thought is terror or pain. Yet... WE....GET....UP! We go about our days, doing the same tasks as everyone else, raising families, working jobs, catching trains and we do all these things through that fear, terror, pain and anxiety. We adapt, we change, we seek support to cope. WE ARE THE STRONG ONES!!
If you asked a 'normal' person to feel the level of fear we can often feel and then ask them to continue their lives, would they be able to? Would they be able to get on the train to visit their family, despite their fear of trains! Would they be able to go into those crowed Christmas shops when they hate crowds! Would they be able to get out of bed and talk to their family on the other side of the world, despite a bad panic attack, and still continue on with their day like I did this morning. NO! They would probably not be able to continue!
I was told today to 'just be strong' until I leave! Do you know what... I AM STRONG! I GOT OUT OF BED! I CONTINUED MY DAY! I fought the fear and anxiety to get through my day. My dad always says to me that I am an amazingly strong person, because I always get back up but... I couldn't see it, I felt I was weak and damaged because I couldn't handle my emotions and anxiety but now I think I understand.
Guys we do amazing things everyday! We fight through our minds and bodies telling us the worst possible things, to live our lives! WE ARE STRONG! Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. If all you managed to do is get out of bed, then GOOD JOB, you fought harder than most people to do that and you won!
Now I'm not sure if this is helpful but I really just wanted to share my thoughts with everyone. I haven't had a great Christmas, but this revelation/feelings just made me feel good. I hope you feel it too!