Hi everyone , my name is Paige and I'm a stay at home single mom. Recently, my parents, daughter, and I caught COVID19 Delta variant and we were all extremely sick. I was rushed to the ER twice because the virus settled in my stomach (go figure) and I had extreme nausea, diarrhea, cramping, etc for almost 2 weeks.
Skipping ahead, my symptoms are gone and I tested negative, but I have been suffering panic attacks and anxiety lasting all day long. My heart races dangerously high all day, I am dizzy and lightheaded, nauseous and sweaty.
I currently take 150mg of Zoloft and 1mg Klonopin once, sometimes twice a day, and .5mg Xanax as needed and it isn't helping relax me or stop the anxiety AT ALL. I've also started experiencing horrible insomnia that causes me to only fall asleep if I take 1mg Xanax (two pills) and Seroquel or Ambien. As soon as I wake up, I am in a panic once again for the rest of the day.
This is anxiety that just refuses to be put down. Like nothing I've ever experienced before. I've been diagnosed with major depression, but with the Zoloft, I haven't been affected by depression or any anxiety for years, so for it suddenly to become so severe is shocking and debilitating. The deep breathing, mindfullness, grounding, meditation does nothing for me- my racing heart pounds through it all. If even medication and these exercises can't keep this anxiety at bay, what is left for me to do?
I have a 19 month old daughter, and my parents have been looking after her while I've been out of commission so to speak. I can hardly eat because the anxiety makes me so nauseous I could vomit, I can't sleep without the pills, hell , stomach's churning, my heart is racing, legs are twitching, and my hands are sweating as I type this. I am pretty much bedridden at this point, but not just sleeping all the time, but rather not sleeping at all. Just laying here. With the misery. My body is weak from laying around and not eating. I've already fainted once yesterday trying to move around.
I have an referral sent in to see a psychologist, but it has to be accepted and then they will call me for intake. I didnt get a clear timeline on that so maybe next week sometime. My next visit with my psychiatrist is October 19th and that's the absolute soonest he can do.
I need some help and any advice anyone could offer, also maybe some thoughts and prayers. I don't know how much longer my body can take this. They say anxiety can't kill you, but this is so severe I'm afraid it could. My heart beats so fast (like 150s-180s) I'm afraid I could have a heart attack. Or eventually die of starvation or something!
I need to get well, for myself and my daughter. Every day is unbearable. If anyone can offer ideas, tips, or resources (I live in Los Angeles County, CA) that would be great. Or if anyone has lived through something like this, please let me know. I feel alone with how severe this anxiety is. Thank you all for reading and I hope you have an amazing day!