Fell asleep with anxiety, woke up with anxiety

[hitbyasegway]

Short background: I was on lexapro for anxiety for over a year and it worked very well. Doctor switched me to Zoloft because they were concerned about my depression. I have been on it now for a little over a week

I don't know where this post is going to end up going, I'm just typing because I have so much anxiety and so many thoughts that I can't keep up with it and I think if I don't put it all out there, it will build up inside of me and i will have an awful panic attack.

I feel like there is a ball in my chest, and someone keeps blowing air into it and I keep telling them please stop it's going to explode but they won't stop. I can't eat still. I'm able to drink water, thank God. It also feels like I'm standing on top of a cliff, looking down. You know that feeling in your stomach you get? That's how I feel all the time lately. I see a therapist, looking for a new one because she doesn't help. I try to talk to those I trust but then, out of love, they ask question to try to understand and I just get mad and frustrated and yell at them, so I try not to talk to too many people when I'm this anxious. I want to cry and scream and throw things and punch walls just to get the anxiety out. I'm losing myself again and that in itself gives me anxiety. I remember vividly how it felt a few years ago to want my anxiety to go away so badly that I threatened my life. I don't want to get to that point again. I freaked out a few weeks ago and went to the psychiatric ER because I was scared it was going to get to that point one day. I ended up being fine, but I don't want to go to the ER for a false alarm because they'll admit me next time. I've gone way too many times in the past for them not to. And I don't blame them, that's their job. They want to help and prevent stuff. But I don't want to be admitted. I don't live alone and my parents check up on me a lot and I'm not a threat to anyone. The worst thing I've done to hurt myself if I just take a screw driver and hit myself with the handle until all of the anxiety I feel goes away. It's so messed up that this is how we think sometimes. That it's better to feel physical pain than emotional. I know I'm not the only one who feels like this. It's not fair that normal people can go through life and none of this is a concern to them. They don't have to be worried about if they're going to have a breakdown at the slightest inconvenience. It's not fair and I hate all of this.

[Agora1]

Hi hitbyasegway... I'm going to try and address all your concerns and hope that it

can settle you down some. The fact that you've only been on Zoloft for a week isn't

long enough to have any effect yet. It takes at least 4-6 weeks to start working.

Keep your doctor posted on your progress during that time.

That sensation of a ball in your chest that feels like someone is blowing air is caused

by your anxiousness. When we are anxious, we tend to swallow air when we breathe,

sleep, eat or talk. The muscles in the esophagus get tight and cause that air to get trapped.

It's very common to be able to drink water and yet food goes down slowly.

Trying to explain to others who don't have a clue what we go through, is one of the most

frustrating things imaginable. As for wanting to cry and scream and punch things, I've

been there at times. Find your own quiet space and let it out, punching a pillow.. It will

help release those pent up emotions and it may calm you down.

As for going to the ER, there's not too much they can do for frustration and anxiety short

of giving you a calming medication unless that is, that you are a danger to yourself or others.

Then of course, they can and will admit you for your own well being. Never be afraid to

seek out help if you are in a bad state.

Last but not least, please don't hit yourself to take away the pain of anxiety. I know what

you are saying in that physical pain seems so much easier to bear than deep emotional

pain. There are other methods you can draw strength from. Exercise can be very beneficial

in releasing your emotions, your fears, your heightened anxiety. Using calming meditations

and breathing can lower your heart rate, relax those muscles in your chest as well as lower

the adrenaline that's making you feel so bad.

I know it doesn't seem fair that the average person can go through life without the worry

of breaking down in front of others and dealing with this disorder on a daily basis. But life

isn't fair and so we have forums like this which can help make us feel so not alone. Not different

because all of us on this site fully understand what you are going through. It's going to be

okay. This doesn't have to be a lifetime sentence. I was like you at one time and now my

life is once again my own. Stay Positive my friend. We are here for you xx

[Tikirob]

Why do you think you feel this way?

[Biff1985]

Hello, I myself had an awful experience with Zoloft and ultimately ended up taking Wellbutrin (until recently)which works for me. I was experiencing manic episodes on Zoloft within week two, people will tell you that it takes a few weeks for it to kick in. That is not true for everyone. I know everyone reacts different to meds and I’ve never been in your shoes.

I am male, 34yrs. I ended up switching doctors until I found one who really listens to me and doesn’t bs me. I suggest everyone do the same. She ran tests until finally she found I have hormone imbalance. Now I take testosterone and I feel so good I’ve quit meds. Physical fatigue, anxiety, depression, lack of appetite, no energy, ALL GONE. Male or female, you could have a simple imbalance. Keep trying!! Don’t give up!! There is an answer!!!