MAD

Hi Im new im 47yrs old and have suffered from MDD and MAD for 20yrs or more. Im having a tough time I lost my Best Friend of 43yrs last Aug from cancer we grew up together had our children she got married I haven't yet met the guy but we had an amazing friendshipIm doing ok with the loss though its hard. I have been on a anxiety medication for 12yrs alprazolam I was up very high 6mg a day but had no idea that it was way to much as I trusted my psych doctor that i went to for 12yrs well im diwn to 3mg daily but eventually will come diwn off of that to start clonipin another benzo but im with a new doctor who seems to really care where my other doctor if he didn't retire he would have lost his license to practice because he had alot of clients up over the legal limit on benzos. Anyway im also on wellbutrin for yrs 150xl in the am but my new doc said it causes increased anxiety which no one is really familiar with so please ask you doc about that plus if your on zanax it also has a rebound anxiety effect which im going through now so the both meds are increasingly making my anxiety and depression very bad. So im trying to deal day by day alot if times i cant make it out if bed yet go outside plus I have no support of any friends and im estranged from my family and my son doesn't talk to me. So between trying to regulate my meds and therapy and now the Holudays are almost here I gave really no one and im lonely and sad nothing to look forward too the hoplessness has been horrible thank goodness for my fur baby cat Ben hes a great support my kleenex for tears. Anyone have any helpful ways to help???

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Hi Kann4 , sorry to read about the loss of your friend. I do understand the no friends, family etc as I also have no friends and no family that is close to me. I also feel lonely on a daily basis. So I’m hoping that I can help us both by messaging here and saying to you that I try to say something positive in the morning and I am finding that it helps. Small steps are better than trying to take huge ones. Do what you can and then add something else when you feel ready to. I also find my dog helps as I can cuddle her all the time.

[froggymom88]

Saying positive things to yourself is a good idea. You can also try listening to upbeat music and keeping busy with things you like to do. Take a class , try a new hobby, journal. Think of a happy time or event and try to stay focused on them.