The never ending cycle of Health Anxiety

[Vt1988]

The never ending cycle of Anxiety

First of all let me say I’m so relieved to have somewhere to express my anxiety. Though I have such a loving and understanding support system I feel like such an annoyance at times. I know my thoughts are often times incredibly irrational and yet I can’t help but get overwhelmed and scared by them.

It all started after my son was born. I was so incredibly scared something bad was going to happen to him. (It took me ten years to become pregnant and carry to full term). My biggest fear is a food allergy. I of course googled way too much and ended up even more afraid.

Then the fear of a food allergy not only became a concern for him but for myself.

I’ve only had mild reactions to mango and cashews. The Dr at the time (six years ago) didn’t seem too concerned. Just prescribed me an epi pen and sent me on my way.

Fast forward back to now and I’m terrified I’m going to have a terrible food reaction and die. Again, I know this irrational but I can’t stop the thoughts. I’m miserable. I’m usually such a foodie and now I eat for substance only.

It doesn’t help that I believe my fear has manifested itself physically. It started with tingling at random spots in my tongue. I would check it multiple times a day. At times I got a sensation of my tongue swelling but when I would go look at it there was nothing. This began to consume me even more and I decided to talk to my PCP about it. She prescribed me Lexapro and I tried it out.

I honestly don’t believe I was drinking enough and I ended up with a burning tongue and severe dry mouth. This however escalated my anxiety as my tongue became slightly Inflamed, red in areas and slightly swollen... this is the time I did something I’ve never done. I couldn’t get back into my PCP for two days so I went to two walk in’s in the same day... Yes, you read that right. The first doctor said it was a viral infection that spread to my tongue and the second said it was oral thrush.

I then went to my primary who asked if I was tested for strep (but she never did it herself) and just said it could be thrush or a reaction to Lexapro. Honestly I don’t believe it was either but all three said it didn’t appear to be a food allergy. My rational side tells me it’s from me thrusting my tongue forward and grinding my teeth due to anxiety but my irrational side said it’s due to a food allergy.

I now do have a viral infection and I was able to remove a small tonsil stone that was causing a scratching feeling on the ride side of my throat. My throat and tongue still feel funny but not terrible. I took two Benadryl today just to see if it would affect my tongue any but it didn’t touch it (which only confirmed that this all has to be in my head.)

I’ve always had a slightly large tongue that has had scalped edges but never the issues with the odd sensations.

Part of me wants to do the food allergy tests but it’s a double edged sword. If I get it done and I’m allergic to things I’ll be terrified but I’m also terrified now. The allergy tests are also not 100%. And cost so much.

I also have to add that it doesn’t seem to get worse with eating. While eating the sensation is gone and when I’m done eating the sensation just comes back at the intensity it was before.

I’m just miserable. I just want to enjoy my son and quality time with my family but this is consuming my life.

I started going to an acupuncturist as well as working on some CBT methods but I so wish there was a quick fix to this.

I’m not only sharing this for myself but for those in similar shoes... I hope this makes you feel a little less alone. I’m going to continue to update as I work on everything. All advice and suggestions are more than welcome just please be kind... I know my thoughts are irrational.

[thyroidmom84]

I am glad you found this forum, it has been very helpful to me. I understand health anxiety all too well. After the birth of my second child, I developed hypothyroidism/Hashimoto’s. It has come with a bunch of crazy symptoms, all of which have convinced me I am going to die and leave my children. It’s awful and consumes my thoughts. The anti anxiety medications don’t help much (except Ativan but I can’t stay on that long). I also place my worries onto my children and compulsively monitor every bruise. It’s certainly not easy and if I had uncovered some better coping strategies I’d let you know. Well I am in therapy and that helps a bit.

[Vt1988 in reply to thyroidmom84]

Thank you so much for your reply. If only their was a quick fix to this anxiety thing. I’m so sorry you’re struggling as well. Yeah, the anxiety medication only seemed to escalate things. I’m working hard on changing the way my brain thinks. I’ve stopped googling and working hard to challenge my irrational thoughts... it still consumes me at this point though. I’m def. looking into therapy as well, I’m glad to hear it’s helping you.

[thyroidmom84 in reply to Vt1988]

That’s great that you have stopped googling- any tips on that? Do you tell yourself specific things when you have the urge?

[Vt1988 in reply to thyroidmom84]

I just tell myself it will only make it worse. My mom also made a good point, anyone can put something on the internet so not everything you read is true. That really helped me... I also asked myself if my symptom is a true symptom or just my anxiety playing tricks on me. I’ll take a moment, breathe and think of my calm/happy place... if the symptom subsides (even slightly) I know it’s my anxiety and it helps me to fight the urge to google.

[Charbey in reply to Vt1988]

I had a good friend tell me. When did they close medical schools!? I have the urge sometimes. But I say what am I gonna get out of it?? Its hard trust me.

[Charbey]

Hi - I read your post. The part that was interesting to me was

( a burning tongue and severe dry mouth. This however escalated my anxiety as my tongue became slightly Inflamed, red in areas and slightly swollen). When my healthy anxiety first started my doctor put me on Lexapro. I had dry mouth but I kept taking it. Then he upped my lexapro dose. My dry mouth got so bad. Of course I look in the mirror and pull my tongue out and all the taste buds in my eyes were inflamed. Omg freaked me out. And yes I ran to DR. GOOGLE. I kept taking the medication. And the dry mouth kept getting worse so probably 4 months later I went to my doctor you didn't seem concerned he said you can go to an ENT. So I went to a dentist because Google said the worst of the worst dentist said I was fine and then finally a month later I decided to go and ENT. He looked felt my tongue look down my throat and said he didn't see anything wrong everything look normal but he did say your on a medication that will cause dry mouth. He suggested I needed to lower the dose.

I felt better reading your post because I was like finally I wasn't alone.

[Vt1988 in reply to Charbey]

I’m so glad my post made you feel better. I was only on Lexapro for two weeks and trying my hardest to drink enough water ... I was up to 12 bottles a day and still had severe dry mouth, It was awful! Maybe I should have toughened it out to see how things went but it just threw me into a panic.

[Charbey in reply to Vt1988]

The ent told me I needed off the meds. So my doctor stopped it.

[Charbey in reply to Vt1988]

And yes it's a never-ending cycle. Actually can be very vicious I kind of called the circle life for me right now. And so hypersensitive to everything in my body right now can I have some good days maybe a good week or two and then maybe a not-so-good day or two. But you're in a half ago when I was dealing with it for about a year alone without anything it was bad.

[mknits]

A few yrs ago, I had an infection. The doctors had told me a number of yrs prior that I was allergic to penicillin. So the meds they gave were not as strong. When after a second try of the meds was not working they asked if I was truly allergic. I said that is what I had been told. I even had my mother state that as well as she remembers.

I went to have a 4-5 hour test regarding if I was allergic. I wasn't comfortable about doing it but they told me that there are antidote they can administer if I am still allergic. The doctor stated that many are no longer to certain things --be it meds and or food-- if they have not had them in over a certain amount of years. It depends upon the item you had been told you were allergic.

I am no longer allergic at this time. I took the penicillin and things turned out for the better.

Whatever you decide I hope only the best for you.