I feel like I’m in some sort of anxiety or depression episode.

[Jmerrick22]

The person I’m seeing I love to death. When we see each other I get that tingly feeling all the time, and when we kiss it’s amazing. However I noticed everything they leave to go home my anxiety goes through the roof and I get upset and cry. I feel like she’s my world and when she leaves I feel bummed because she makes me feel happy loved and cared about. But twice now I woke up with this disturbing thought of I’m falling out of love, or what if I stop loving her, and I cry hysterically and freak out. She out of the blue about two weeks ago told me she needs space and doesn’t know when she’s going to see me again. That threw me into crying a lot and feeling very down. I’m still not over it, and we spent the last four days together which was amazing. It’s weird I feel like I have some sort of a guard up now. And I keep getting these obsessive thoughts. If you follow my posts you’ll see I obsess about omg what if I cheat, or what if I do this or that. I would never ever have sex with another person other than her. When we first started talking and weren’t office yet I jerked off with a friend of mine. Also just last night I masturbated and felt like I was cheating!!! What the hell is wrong with me, I always have this guilt feeling inside me and I can’t fogure anything out. My heads all over the place. She and I watched movies and all and talked about who we would have sex with off of tv and all, but why do I keep obsessing like I’m a cheater and all this shit? I’m on buspar and it’s like it’s not helping. They’re adding Prozac now and I’m hoping for Ativan to control the shaking I keep getting anxiety wise. My mother gives me all kind of issues too and my finances drive me nuts. I can’t live in the present my head won’t let me . Tell me this stuff goes away and I’m not the only person that ever gets these thoughts and obsessions ?!?? What helps you ? I do love her with every ounce of me but I feel like either this anxiety or depression episode isn’t making me think clearly. I kinda feel like I need to have time away from everyone. God I hope I can get a grip on this.

[Jmerrick22]

Also I’m getting obsessive scary intrusive thoughts. I had a thought that my significant other would hurt them self and I started crying like a maniac and hyperventilating! My anxiety is so severe right now I can’t take it. Also my hormone levels are really off. My testosterone and estrogen levels are high. Can this be part of this as well?

[lovablelaughter7]

I often struggle with the same thing. As a single female, I struggle having one or two days of physical and emotional closeness with a prospective partner because it spirals me into total anxiety mode after. I cry all the time and obsess over how good I felt being with that person. Physically I too struggle with panic like symptoms. Somehow our brains are wired to play the horrible what if game that sends us into a tizzy. The thoughts of infidelity are common so remember its your anxiety making you feel that way.

It's okay to be unsure about how you feel. Wanting to feel connected sometimes overpowers our rational feelings. Just continue to be open and maintain good communications with your partner about what you're experiencing.