So annoyed today!!!!!: I’m so sick and tired... - Anxiety Support

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So annoyed today!!!!!

Minnie87
Minnie87

I’m so sick and tired of people not understanding this condition.its mentally exhausting to have to keep explaining it!

My family and friends keep expecting me to do things but can’t understand that because I’m so lightheaded/faint I just can’t and to be honest don’t want to whilst I feel like this.

They are getting angry and saying they have had enough,how do they think I feel!!!!!

Sorry for the rant.just at my wits end.

39 Replies
oldestnewest

I feel for you Minnie...

Unless you've worn the T Shirt so to speak no one knows what it feels like

Laniben
Laniben in reply to Funkyfaerie

Yes that’s true x

Minnie87
Minnie87 in reply to Funkyfaerie

Thank you for your reply.i totally agree.i just really can’t understand how people can’t understand! Xx

I really do know how you feel, I’ve been trying to explain certain things this morning to member of the family. And I do know she’s trying to help with tough love sometimes but she doesn’t quite get it and I don’t fully expect her to really. I’ve said about how the horrible physical symptoms make me feel and that sometimes they can often be worse than just plain anxiety, but it’s difficult trying to explain that unless someone’s experienced it themselves. I get quite upset when I can’t make myself understood. And Yes it is mentally exhausting x

Minnie87
Minnie87 in reply to Laniben

Yes!

The thing that annoys me is they think you can just snap out of it.if that was the case I wouldn’t be housebound and would have snapped out of it 12 years ago!

I do get that people just want us better but that’s not the way to go about it xx

Oh I know !!! This is hard people who doesn’t feel it can’t understand it and it is easy to say think positive ! Or just ignore it! But it is hard for us ...... just try to understand them , they want to help and they don’t know how

They love you 😘

And you are not alone I feel the same way with my husband he says you need to win not your mind ! This is your mental problem not mine you need to fix it because I can’t do it for you

And it is true but is hard to feel alone on this battle (Daily)

God bless you and your family

I am here for you

Minnie87
Minnie87 in reply to sarellano26

Thank you so much for the reply.

Same goes to you.

I would love nothing more than to have my life back.im sure you would too.and I have no idea why the physical symptoms have come back with such a vengeance but we need people to support and help not shout and go off in a huff.i really have had enough xx

Hi Minnie, I don't know if the day will ever come that family or friends will

understand our mental illness. The longer it goes on, the more frustrating

it becomes for us in trying to explain. So....there comes a time that we have

to decide that we owe no one an excuse or an explanation since it falls on

deaf ears. We can't afford to feel any worse than we already do. So, without

any guilt or shame, we must let their advice or put downs (in my case) go in

one ear and out the other. (Difficult beyond belief) But a necessity for our

own well being.

And if we are lucky enough to find someone truly caring about us without

any doubts, then we are truly blessed. Embrace that person because they

are rare. Sending you many hugs because I care. xx

Stressed4real
Stressed4real in reply to Agora1

Well said. And this advice helps all of us..

Minnie87
Minnie87 in reply to Agora1

So much love for you agora.and thank you so much for all your continued love and support.cant thank you enough in fact xxxx

Hi Minnie, I am very lucky to have a supportive family & my few close friends encourage me. I am a senior citizen. My mother (who was ill from a car accident) most of her life lived in constant pain 24/7. Many did not believe pain could exist a life time. I always remember her saying "don't judge me until you have walked a mile in MY shoes!" How true it is! I go to support group meetings 2x a month. We often talk about the things people say to us regarding our condition. We all have heard it at some time. For me personally, if I annoy you or you think I'm doing this for attention, then I really don't need or want to associate with you. Hang in there, tell them if they have nothing positive or helpful to say, then please don't comment at all! Take care.

Minnie87
Minnie87 in reply to kama24

Thank you so much for your reply.

You are so right!

I wish people would just either go away or support!

I’ve lost so many people through this and some have just got really nasty!i can not understand it! X

kama24
kama24 in reply to Minnie87

Sadly some people will never understand! I try so hard to reason with myself & fail. It's 4 years this August that my full blown daily panic/anxiety reared it's ugly head. For those people who have dropped you as a friend, I would have to say they were not TRUE friends to begin with. I go to group support sessions 2x a month. It feels so "comforting" when you talk to someone who 100% understands. Each meeting we have a topic of discussion. Today it is "acceptance" ....yes, how does one "accept" what we deal with. All we can do is take it one day at a time. Do you find your anxiety starts to wean off as the day passes? I find about 5pm I am almost "normal". Frankly I don't even go to my doctor anymore. I just take the meds prescribed....why I often wonder as I honestly don't feel they help. I am too cowardly to go off them though! Try to keep occupied with chores, talk to yourself, don't give up! You are not alone.

Minnie87
Minnie87 in reply to kama24

Hi!i left you a reply above but it didn’t tag you! It’s starts with “this bout of anxiety” hope you find it!

kama24
kama24 in reply to Minnie87

Drats, I went up and down the page but couldn't find your response! It is nearing noon hr. here. I'm going to actually give in and take an Ativan. I seldom use them but there are times when I say "why go through the day like this, just take one"! I only resort to them about 6x in a month so not too bad. I'll give another look b4 signing out to see if I can find your post.

Minnie87
Minnie87 in reply to kama24

Hang on I will copy and paste!

Minnie87
Minnie87 in reply to kama24

This bout of anxiety has been different to any others I’ve had over the years.

I’m housebound and constantly lightheaded/faint.i also have the heart palpitations and butterflies etc etc.but the head feelings leave me housebound as they are so bad 24/7.

I don’t know why it’s happened but I just feel so different and strange and almost like I will never be normal again.

That’s amazing that you have found a group that you can go to.it really must be so nice to sit and talk to others in the same position.do you find that it really helps?

kama24
kama24 in reply to Minnie87

I highly recommend group therapy. I took a CBT course a couple of yrs. ago (cognitive behavioural therapy) and we covered a lot of different ways to look at things. Mind you it was not a "cure" but a help. I've had skipped beats and PVCs for many many years. The cardiologist has checked me out etc and says not to worry unless I had heart disease. I too some times feel off balance and "weak". but it does wear off. I have Health Anxiety....worry about health issues and "what if". The thought of death terrifies me and being old doesn't help! My friend in town has agrophobia and can only leave her apt. to walk the dog on the lawn. Have you ever asked your doctor about Ativan, not for long term use but just to give you a break here and there (if it helps). I take 2mg sublingual if I am at my worse. Do you have a Mental Health Society or unit that you can call to see what support, if any, is offered? It's 5pm here and the normal me is back.....we talked about acceptance in group today. It is really difficult to do but can you talk to yourself and tell yourself "this is just temporary. I will improve as the day passes". I also find fresh air can work wonders. Just sit out in your back yard for a while.

My husband just got so frustrated with me and it’s so hard to explain awful anxiety when it’s irrational. He is normally really helpful but I’m sure he is frustrated and sad at the situation seeing me so upset

lawdog
lawdog in reply to sajax

Hello Sajax. I have the ANXIETY!!!!! on one side of the coin, and deeeepeeeessssiiiooonnn, on the other side. Four years ago, I woke I didn't want my feet to touch the floor as I knew the anxiety race would start and didn't know how to slow it down much less turn it off. There is a race pattern in our carpet from my pacing in a circle though the house humming off key.

For whatever reason I'm not doing that anymore. But it made me exhausted physically...I wasn't think of anything, just had my body feel like it couldn't stop.

My husband had no idea how I felt. How could he? One day we had a talk. He said he gave up trying to understand, so he just learned to accept it.

That was probably the worst back-handed slap in the face I ever had....and he thought he was making a such effort to learn just to accept it.

So I agree with those who say another person couldn't possibly know how we feel.

(But sometimes I think a little evil and wish my husband would have a tiny kidney stone to pass. I heard more than once it's the closest a man will feel giving birth. Maybe that would help them to understand how we feel.) :)

sajax
sajax in reply to lawdog

I think that would piss me off too!!

Minnie87
Minnie87 in reply to sajax

I understand.although my partner is amazing and has done everything for me, he does get upset and misses the old me.i think our partners just hate seeing us like this as they love us so much x

lawdog
lawdog in reply to Minnie87

Yes, and they don't know what to do. Weren't expecting the situation.

My number ONE rule is NEVER EVER talk to family and friends about your anxiety, they do Not nor do they want too. It's too complex, no one knows what causes anxiety or a cure? The professionals have different theories? My kids have chosen to isolate me as a way to deal with me. A long time friend was sending me tips about it. She has Stopped speaking to me. My sister who was listening to me doesn't call anymore. I pretend everything's ok when I'm around my family. Are you in counseling? You sound pretty Angry? Accept that they don't get it and STOP speaking to them about their Not going to change? Have them visit this site and let them read some of the stories? Tell them you're fine. Write us on this site and Vent here. Not worth hurting relationships OVER this.

I guess I’m just a bit fed up.i don’t understand how people can be so cruel.my friend had a mental health disorder before I had anxiety and I was there for her day and night because I wanted to be.i know not everybody is the same but still xx

People who behave like this are afraid of what they know Nothing about? Mental illness is a Real and Serious thing that should NOT be ignored. I'm getting ready to change my psychiatrist, the one I had gave me Medication that I had told her I had already taken wasn't working for me. Right now I have been feeling so distressed my head n stomach hurt. So let people talk, it's from a place of Ignorance n fear.

you don't have to apologize to people on this forum we totally understand i also find that people who don't have our issues don't understand what it's like to be us. they think it's in our heads when in reality it's totally real

Minnie87
Minnie87 in reply to fib4

Thank you.yes that’s totally right!

I just think people should be much mor understanding xx

Is it Menieres(?) disease? I knew someone that had ear grommets to help with the dizziness which seemed to work for them. Don’t know if that’s any use for you to know?!

I’ve been told all my symptoms are anxiety.but thank you for your help.will mention that to my doctor x

I was reading yesterday about how it takes a lot longer for women to get a diagnosis bc they are...women! I was rather stunned. It does seem to depend on which Dr you get to see. Have had fibromyalgia confirmed by a professional (!) after 6+yrs of believing it was bone based pain- it’s amazing what a person can get used to isn’t it?!

You’ll get better stay strong

Thank you.same to you x

Mine is horrible

Sorry it's like this for you X I think people find it difficult to understand when they haven't or arnt experiencing it themselves, however family and friends should be supportive and empathetic towards you, all I can say is thier are people out there who can be supportive, are you getting help from your local MH team and able to use the services on offer? I don't no what it's like where you are though. Are you able to use apps like Headspace? Sorry if my suggestions are lousy I no we really just want it to go full stop but sometimes it's a lot of trial and error to find the the treatment.

Kat

This bout of anxiety has been different to any others I’ve had over the years.

I’m housebound and constantly lightheaded/faint.i also have the heart palpitations and butterflies etc etc.but the head feelings leave me housebound as they are so bad 24/7.

I don’t know why it’s happened but I just feel so different and strange and almost like I will never be normal again.

That’s amazing that you have found a group that you can go to.it really must be so nice to sit and talk to others in the same position.do you find that it really helps?

Hi Minnie, I truly hope today is some better for you. I've done some googling about "acceptance" and am trying to dwell on that concept. NOT easy. Have you ever asked your doctor about trying CBD oil (there is no THC) in it. I take what is called 1 to 1 capsules, 2.5mg CBD, 2.5 mg THC. I will say that it has greatly changed my sleeping habits and I no longer lay awake half the night. I went through a MD who referred me to a dispencery. I re read your one post and can so feel for you. Are you able to get a good night's rest? Take care.

Minnie87
Minnie87 in reply to kama24

Thank you so much for all your amazing help and advice.honestly I appreciate it so much.

I haven’t tried cbd but I am going to as I’ve heard some amazing things about it.

I do sleep better now but always wake with a racing heart and butterflies and then the lightheaded feeling begins.

I will def ask for the oil.

How long have you suffered for if you don’t mind me asking?

kama24
kama24 in reply to Minnie87

I am thrilled you were able to walk your daughter to school. Perhaps this is a new beginning? I have been on the CBD oil for almost a yr. Yes, I still have panic attacks & days of anxiety, but I have good days too once in a while. The rule they tell you with CBD and or THC is to "start low and go slow". It can't hurt to try it. It seems to help some but not others. What do we have to lose?? It is 11:30 am here so I need to do a few chores then groceries this afternoon. I hope you continue to improve.

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