Having a hard time controlling my anxiety.

[ImHere_Again]

I have not written anything here for a while, because I thought I was handling my anxiety pretty well. Lately I have not been feeling myself.

I feel like my anxiety is starting to control me. I just started my last quarter in college so I have been stressed. I have been getting migraines that make me feel really off balance. I usually feel off balance a lot and I have already been checked by the doctor. Apparently it's just me. It just sucks because I can't do much about it, all I can do is hope it goes away soon. I have been given medication for my anxiety but I am afraid of taking it. My fear of being dependent on the medication, prevents me from taking it. My anxiety comes in different ways either from being too dizzy or having trouble breathing because I feel like I am not inhaling enough air. Lately I have been getting both symptoms at the same time, and I just don't know what to do now. I can't talk to anyone. Days have been getting harder to get through. I thought since I started school, my mind would be distracted but I think it's making it worse. Today I have class at 9:00 am to 6:30 pm which I m afraid I won't be able to last all day, since I have to leave my house at 7:30 am and won't be back to my house untill 7:30 pm. I am just scared. My body feels exhausted mentally and physically. I'm trying to sleep right now because I have to be up early in the morning but I feel like whenever I am falling into a deep sleep, I lose my breath and quickly wake up to catch my breath. I know if I don't get sleep, I am just going to be feeling worse throughout the day.

[ImHere_Again]

UPDATE:I just woke up I only slept for three hours. I have a feeling I am going go have an anxiety attack some time today. I am going to be I'm school all day. I will have no one to help me. I can barely take deep breaths and I am shaky. I'm nervous for my drive to school since there tends to be a lot of traffic and I have to drive for a little more than an hour. I scared.

[JAYnLA in reply to ImHere_Again]

I know you're facing some challenges right now and I'm personally familiar with all of them. I hope you can seek out a therapist who will start helping you to deal with not only these uncomfortable sensations but the underlying reasons for them. Keep in mind, even when it's difficult, that they are only sensations and they will always pass. Thanks for being here.

[ImHere_Again in reply to JAYnLA]

Thank you! I think I'm going to have to seek help on campus. I know the feeling is temporary but some days are worse than others and those days are the hardest. I just had one of my classes and it went well but now I'm not feeling well. I hope this feeling is over soon. Thank you for replying to my message and helping me through this.

[Icanbeathis2016]

I know all of those feelings you said all to well. I almost thought it was me posting again. I'd have some of my worst anxiety days and it kept me feeling defeated about my day. Thinking I was not going to be able to make it through the days alot of times. And thankfully I would. But yes the exhaustion feelings, not getting any sleep, body feeling week, being awakened from my sleep like I'm gasping for air as if I've stopped breathing in my sleep, and feeling unbalanced.

Anxiety can definitely do the trick. And in would say the same things and crying as I'm saying, "I just know if I dont get enough sleep, I'm gonna have a hard time tomorrow." Yes I'd be crying so much when I wasn't getting no sleep and knew I had things to do the next day like go to work. You are not alone.

[ImHere_Again in reply to Icanbeathis2016]

Thanks for letting me know that I am not alone because often I tend to believe that. I don't speak much of my anxiety to anyone. When I don't feel well I keep it in because most people believe it's just me being dramatic, which is why I have been holding off my visit to a therapist. Thank you for your kind words and I really do hope that you get better as well.

[Icanbeathis2016 in reply to ImHere_Again]

Yeah I've had my times of not telling anyone about my problems because for one they got their own problems, they dont feel like hearing no one else's. And if we do tell them our problems they act like they'll care or can help but sometimes people don't do what they say they'll do.

Or they just don't get it or understand. So then I just isolated myself from people more and more. I have however, went to therapy though. It helped some. I'll go again if I needed too.

[Zazzel]

You certainly aren’t alone in your feelings. You are not weak or crazy or bad because you have these feelings. You are just wired this way. Our world has become high anxiety and for those of us who are sensitive, it’s a constant challenge, but you are strong and you are pushing yourself everyday to control it. That takes courage!

So glad you are seeking help. I know you had a doctor check you out, but just wondering if you have any allergies or intolerances. Not sure where you live, but the pollen count where I live has been super high. It causes me to feel like I can’t get deep breathes. Similar to what you described. Then, if I think about it, it gets worse and harder to catch my breath. Just something to check out. As for your migraines, are they giving you any meds for them? I had migraines for years and so I understand your misery there.There are so many causes for those and often hard to pinpoint, but they should be able to give you something to help relieve or lessen them.

Hope you feel better soon.

O