I'm having an absoutle nightmare! Really don't know what to do and so many questions!

Hiya - apologies in advance for this post as may be quite long

So I've posted a lot on here and find everything so useful so just wondering for any help and advice.

I've suffered from anxiety for some time now, it started around December 2015 and up until May 2017 I suffered badly and tried everything. Antidepressants didn't help and CBT did really help, anyways it kind of stopped in May and I eventually stopped using propranolol (my safety net).

In August 2017 I had really bad case of flu, I felt terrible, and when it first started I was on a tram and kind of felt sick and then had this rush of anxiety and since then anxiety has been with me, again - every time I get on a train or public transport, I feel so anxious, its like I dread it happening days before I need to get a on a train so its like im telling myself that its a bad situation - its just weird why it came back??

Anyways fast forward to now and im so sick to death of feeling like this, last night was awful and could hardly breath, I currently have a dental absesss, so typical me is worried about that! but why?

i had cbt today as was referred to have the sessions again and find them positive but they have now referred me to like another level of cbt, more intense? does anyone know what that might involve?

overall, i wouldn't say my anxiety is taking over my life, i can manage the best I can but find this constant nag any fear I get at times is scaring me and im wasting far too many days feeling tired and scared.

what can i actually do?

does anyone have any websites or useful information that might just help me relax?

does anyone take propanolol? if so it stops panic attacks doesn't it? and when should i take them - i take them as and when but finding that when i feel anxious when i take it, it takes time to work so obviously it doesn't calm me down straight away - maybe if i take it in the morning and afternoon?

sorry i kind of hope all this makes sense, im so fed up and just ranting and trying to explain how i feel and always find it difficult to explain. like im not worried about anything, its more physical sensations i get that then set my anxiety off

[Hidden]

Once you've experienced anxiety/panic its stored in your memory just like many other experience, these memories can be triggered by other things eg, you had flu so felt poorly, this triggered your anxiety because it's symptoms are stored as an unpleasant memory, anxiety symptoms, flu symptoms, viral infection symptoms, all have some similar sensations involved, headaches, hot/cold flashes, temperature, pain, depression, don't let this set back dishearten you, it's just a set back, you've felt better before and so you will again, anxiety creeps in from time time even after recovery, don't try and shut it out, instead allow it to come in, let it come and go as it pleases, once you remove the fear anxiety can't scare you anymore xxx

[Trees2357 in reply to Hidden]

That's what I'm having a hard time with. I can't stop fearing and feeling sad

[Starrlight]

Andrewtxland, hey there so sorry you are having troubles with anxiety. I am too. I just restarted taking propranolol this morning 1 hour before I needed it to work. (I take 20mg) I did not have the usual panic attack symptoms so I am thinking the propranolol is working but possibly was a coincidence; I will keep up with the med though since I’m guessing it’s helpful.

Good luck with the next level of CBT! That’s a great accomplishment and glad you find it to be positive. My therapist wants me to do DBT. I wish you a calm energy throughout your days. Best to you! Let us know how the propranolol works!?