I don't know what to do.

[Xcarreon]

Hello. I've never done this before so I'm not sure if I am doing this correctly.

My boyfriend of two and a half years broke up with me last month. It was definitely not expected. He is leaving for the navy in february. We have continued to see each other and everytime that I bring up our break up and if he still wants to be with me he says he doesn't know. Anyways that is the background story. Ever since this happened I haven't been able to sleep. I wake up with nightmares and just thinking about it and writing about it right now is making my heart feel out of control. I have trouble controlling my breathing and my thoughts. I don't know anyone with anxiety so I'm not even quite sure if I am experiencing it. if you have any advice that can help me I would really appreciate it.

[AussieKel83]

It sounds like anxiety to me Hun. What other symptoms do you get & is it only when you see him you feel this way? We are here to help & we are all in the same situation...so vent away & never be ashamed to say what you feel...as none of us judge.

Kelly x

[Xcarreon in reply to AussieKel83]

I haven't slept through the night since it happened. I just feel so depressed. It's when I don't see him or talk to him. If I allow myself to think about it I start to freak out. I've never dealt with feelings like these before and I don't feel comfortable talking about this with my family or friends because in a way I feel ashamed that I am so weak. I just want to take control of my life again. I want to stop feeing like this. Thank you for taking the time to reply to me. I really appreciate it.

[AussieKel83 in reply to Xcarreon]

Babe, in my opinion the best the you can do for yourself & your mental health is stop talking to him all together. He's giving you false hope by still seeing you, and he's making you hold onto something that may not ever happen again. That's not fair he's doing that to you, knowing that's he's leaving for the navy soon. How old are you may I ask? Don't ever ever ever feel weak...the weak ones are the ones who don't speak up...you have so your very strong for admitting what you're feeling.

[Xcarreon in reply to AussieKel83]

I am 21 years old. I know that I am young and that there's is plenty of other people in the world. I want to stop seeing him and talking to him, but I just can't seem to do it. I think I'm more devastated about loosing my best friend than my partner. I just want to be able to control what I'm feeling. Thank you. This is helping me a lot.

[Redhots7 in reply to Xcarreon]

The break-up is going to hurt but you are worth more and better ! DON'T let him come around after breaking up with you! Hold your head high , go out with some girlfriends, let him worry about losing you !

[Hypoking]

This is completely normal. It's called breaking up You will feel better in a few weeks! You need to spend less time with him and focus on building yourself up. It seems impossible to deal with at first but I've been there done that, and it goes away trust me

[Hidden]

Hi. You may be feeling some anxiety about the condition of your relationship - that would be normal, and emotional/mental conditions very often have physical consequences. The more heavily we have invested in a relationship the harder the blow is when it ends suddenly. On the wider issue of how this person is behaving after announcing the break up - I find it outrageous that he is leading you on in this way. On the face of it it seems clear that he is holding on to you until he leaves so that he has you to continue feeding his ego. Why would you break up with someone but continue to hang around? On the other hand, it might be that he actually has difficulties in letting go himself because the reason for the break up is simply because he is leaving soon. But then, when asked if he wants to be with you he 'does not know'. Overall, I think that it would not be unfair to believe that he is using you. The sooner you cut him out, the sooner you begin the healing process. Don't be fooled by the little boy lost routine - very few people experience genuine difficulty about leaving or continuing relationships once we have decided one way or the other. He knows what he is doing - looking after himself. Now you need to look after yourself. I wish you well.

[Redhots7]

If he broke up with you, you should not give him the pleasure of your company !!! He is getting his cake and eating it too ! Next time he wants to see you , you need to say you have other plans,. If he wants to break-up, then make it a clean break !!!! You need to take control of your feelings, take a stance and feel good about yourself. Right now, he is leading you on til time for him to leave . He needs to know now what it is going to be like without you !!!! He needs to

Miss you now !!! Make him own what he has done , right now doesn't have to get back with you, he can see you and anybody else he wants to .😘