Christmas party blues

[Wyominganxiety]

My fiance has his Christmas party tomorrow night, I'm very nervous about freaking out and embarrassing him in front of all his co workers.. I'm the only one who won't be drinking and I'm super scared he will went to go out after full of stress and emotions blah I wish I could feel normal for once not terrified of events.

[SpeaktheTruth]

That’s a tough spot to be in. I’m lucky, my wife can’t stand going to events so I get out of having to go to any of her work parties.

Would he understand if you stayed home? I use to go out a lot more and my wife never liked to. I understood and was fine with her staying home. I usually had more fun in certain social situations when she didn’t go because I would have to worry about her being uncomfortable and not having a good time if she was out with me.

If you do go, try not to think out freaking out. Take it one step at a time and just try to enjoy being with your husband.

[Wyominganxiety in reply to SpeaktheTruth]

He really wants me to go, so I'm going to suck it up, he's been through everything with my whole anxiety crap it's been long road, I am getting better than I used to I couldn't even leave the house 6 months ago unless I self medicated with alcohol. So he knows if I get to bad I will go to the car for a bit I do have valium to help ease it a bit..

[Jeff1943 in reply to Wyominganxiety]

Don't worry, Wyoming, you'll be fine, you won't freak out, you're a lot better now than you were, remember. Sit sipping a fruit juice and just smile at everyone and make small talk and before you know it it will all be over. Mission accomplished! Who knows, you might even enjoy yourself!

And remember, you've got a valium or two handy if absolutely needed but it's a good chance to practice acceptance. You know, as Claire Weekes wrote, if you can get to the point where you know you can get through a situation whether you're feeling anxious or not then you generate less fear on which sensitised nerves thrive and it's a significant step towards recovery.

So if you possibly can, don't make excuses and not go, instead treat it as an opportunity to practice accepting the bad feelings for the time being, as Claire Weekes used to say 'do what you fear and the death of fear is assured'.

Medications can be helpful but if they held all the answers there wouldn't be 50 million people in the United States experiencing anxiety disorders, that's why self-help is so important.

[Wyominganxiety in reply to Jeff1943]

Thank you Jeff! I'm sure I'll do fine, just been so long since I've even done these things I would have already said by now I'm not going so yes I have come a long way!