Realizing Something

So yesterday I had a break through. I have known my constant negative fears and worries are irrational, but I still can't stop the negative thoughts. I have mild agoraphobia because of panic attacks, and have a fear of walking in open spaces, for fear of not being able to escape. My anxiety is centered around my brain, and I have a fear of fainting, seizure, stroke, brain tumor, etc which I know are all a long shot because I'm a healthy 20 year old girl. Anyways, I was at school waking to my car when I felt a panic attack coming on, starting with jelly legs and a faint feeling. The fear stares rushing, and although I've been trying to ride out these feeling and NOT run away because those are unhealthy behaviors, I couldn't do it for this one. I was sure I was about to faint or have a seizure, and I had to get to a bathroom to escape. When I finally reached a bathroom which felt like a journey, my heart rate slowed and I felt calmer. While I was in the bathroom, I realized that if something really terrible was going to happen to me like a loss of control I'm scared of, going to a bathroom to calm down wouldn't have stopped a seizure or fainting. This is the moment I realized I need to be brave and tough out the panic feelings. They can not hurt me, no matter how uncomfortable and scary they may SEEM. I am determined to beat panic.


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7 Replies

  • all you have to do is remember that the fears in your head are created by you ! every bad thought that goes on your head and causes you to have panick attacks and anxiety is because you created them ! you need to just think that : you're okay, your health is good now , you are loved... and when something bad happens you will deal and go through it but until then don't waste your energy being afraid so big salutes to you for realising that !

  • Your experience reminds me of a section in the book DARE by Barry McDonagh where he describes that feeling and says "you would rather die alone in a toilet than be amongst people who could fetch help if needed?!" We all do the run and hide but that is feeding the anxiety. The only way to conquer it is to go through it. My biggest fear is fainting but once you say "okay anxiety make me faint. Make me feel more dizzy" etc it actually backs off! Congrats on your breakthrough!!!

  • YES I was thinking about that too! Die alone in a bathroom or among people who could help me and call an ambulance? (If needed but I know it won't!)

  • One other thing.......your fear surrounding fainting or having a seizure.....have you ever fainted or had a seizure????? Just remember, your blood pressure increases during a panic attack and fainting is a result of LOW blood pressure. 😘

  • Never had a seizure and have only fainted twice when I was little. I know these things are very rare to happen to me but you know anxiety... sometimes you can't stop the thoughts 😜

  • Yep! So bore yourself with "what are the chances" statistics and slap your brain!! 😂

  • Well said ! The main thing is keep telling yourself come and do your worst !!! And gradually the panic and anxiety starts to go !

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