I can't accept it!

[Sim05ne]

Hi all I've been ill for around 2 years.. started with trouble swallowing then nausea .. every month or so.. thenevery week then to daily.. from September 2016 I've had leg and arm pain.. and back and stomach are unbearable sometimes with pain. Bowels have been unpredictable but as of last 2 weeks I'm crippled with constant bowel movements & cramping .. fatigue .. getting really hot then cold constantly .. chest pain .. dizziness & faint. I feel nauseous 24-7 and headaches . Every time I've got extra symptoms my doc just says anxiety possible ibs.. when I get a wave of hot flush.. my whole body pulsates .. I feel faint then get so emotional. I'm so drained of being ill. I'm so pale these days and big dark circles under my eyes .. I'm only 33 for goodness sakes. good thing is I've hospital app on Wednesday 1st march for scans .. but I'm more afraid of them saying nothing wrong medically! When I know in my palpating heart I'm sick and they aren't helping me 😞 Sorry for the moan but I'm losing the bloody plot xo

[Agora1]

Sim05ne, Good Luck with your scans on Wednesday. Let's start with that to see where it takes you. Let us know how you made out when you get the results. x

[Sim05ne in reply to Agora1]

Thank you agora1 .. I just want my life back! Selfish maybe but I'm so done. 3 kids and 2 cats need me to be on top and right now I'm like an elderly lady crying into a cuppa tea! I'm actually sick looking at my bed ..sick taking painkillers.. roll on hospital app 😟 Xo

[Agora1 in reply to Sim05ne]

I hear you Sim05ne, it's not selfish at all. Stay strong and breathe.... x

[daisy-17]

Hope everything goes well for you and all results come back okay it will give you peace of mind.

[Jeff1943]

Sim05ne, it could be anxiety as all those symptoms can be the result of anxiety, don't despair if the scan shows nothing physical, anxiety is usually easier to treat than physical illness. I think the first question to ask yourself is whether prior to the start of all this 2 years ago you were experiencing a lot of stress and worry?

Let us know on this forum if the finding is anxiety, as fellow/former graduates of the laughing academy we can point you in the direction of recovery.

[Sim05ne in reply to Jeff1943]

Thank you for your reply. I have always been very relaxed and chilled about everything to my mums dismay haha she'd always say I need a good shake .. even under a lot of pressure or stress I laugh it off and deal with it . So that's why I struggle to believe it's down to anxiety.. but I will keep you posted on my progress and if it does boil down to anxiety then il be glad of all yall support through the process of getting to a normal state again . Thank you

[Mazer]

Sound exactly like me, had every one of your symptoms. Propranolol really helped me in the day (stopped the waves of sickness/weakness, the hot and coldness, dizziness and heart palpitations) but didn't fully get rid of the sickness, tense face and feeling weak in the morning, it did help though but taking a higher dose didn't improve it so stayed on 2 20mg doses. I'm now on mirtazapine and have stopped the propranol. Feel good in day and don't feel sick in the morning but still feel terrible (some mornings worse than others) and stomach is the same (maybe worse)

I still can't work out if I get anxiety while sleeping that causes my stomach to go crazy in the night / morning, or if it's just my stomach causing me to feel horrible from eating certain food. (16 months now)

I've finally got a CBT appointment after waiting 6 months! So I'll see what they think is happening. I don't have the scary anxiety thoughts but have a few times when feeling really ill so don't really understand why I'm still feeling crap with stomach issues in the morning. Good luck with your scans.

[Sim05ne in reply to Mazer]

Aww mazer it's horrid. I feel your pain. I tried propanolol and I got more palpitations.. I was on sertraline for a few months there and had to stop them recently as they worsened my symptoms but now my moods are all over the place .. can't win. Do you take these meds and still feel ill but feel better mentally or stop and feel slightly better physically but emotionally unstable? I've never experienced anything like this. I'm usually a very chilled person .. never get sick .. good old immune system but over past 2 years has been hell and I can't help feel I got something that long ago and it's grew worse over time . I'm kind of hoping they find something tomorrow but at same time nothing incurable .. doubt il get sleep tonight .. although I'm super excited about hospital app.. never thought I'd say that! Haha hope you are feeling somewhat normalish ❤️ Xo

[Mazer]

I took propranalol and felt loads better mentally and it also helped my stomach issues but didn't stop them. Then mentally I gradually got worse as the effect of them only seemed to last 5 hours then I felt dodgy so had to take more but that made me feel worse same with higher dose.

Only been on Mirtazapine 4 weeks, first night taking it I felt spaced out, second my joints were aching and had to keep moving my legs and tensing them so they didn't feel as bad (still happens but not as bad)

I was taking less and less propranalol over a week whilst taking the mirtazapine but now (3 weeks on mirt and no prop) I feel better mentally in the day but my stomach is worse and my muscle twitching has come back when relaxed at night and in the morning (propranalol pretty much stopped that symptom) also stomach goes crazy and I get some inside shakiness an hour after taking the mirtazapine and also the heart palps appear now and then again

I tried amytripyline 5 months ago for 6 weeks which didn't stop anything even though I was feeling pretty good before I took them, just thought I'd try to see they helped my stomach and slight muscle twitching at night but they didn't and gave me diarrhea for 4 days straight after being told to up the dose and made me faint and cut my lip open, then I had really bad anxiety for about 2 months after as I was trying to stop taking them!

So it seems I can't win lol.

I started exactly the same as you though, felt great then once a month woke feeling like I had a major hangover which would last all day, then it gradually increased to weekly then every day which then gave me anxiety wondering what the hell was happening to me.

Also the taste in my mouth when I wake is horrible, that's a constant thing that's never changed since I started feeling ill.

I've had loads of tests and wished the same as you hoping they would find something that could be fixed using some antibiotics or something but every test has come back normal sadface + happyface that nothing serious was found.

Hope your hospital appointment went ok, I had my first CBT this morning and was just babbling on about everything I wrote in this message lol.

If you want to PM about anything you can

[Sim05ne]

Well after 2 years of hell and docs saying It's all down to anxiety/ ibs.. my scan showed a lot of gallstones .. I burst into tears of joy! The nurse looked confused. IM NOT MAD! serious guys pester your docs .. if you think it's not right then fight .. you know your own body! I actually was close to a breakdown yesterday .. realistically the doctor made me anxious & made me doubt my body trying to warn me .. go with your gut 💕 Here's to another 6 months of hell while I wait for surgery to have gallbladder removed!? At least I'm not insane 👍

[JoMarie5 in reply to Sim05ne]

I have lots of gall stones as well . They don't want to remove mine unless it's causing pain ! Wth ! I have feelings of fullness ,gas , blotting , nausea sometimes , pain in my back .

[Mazer in reply to Sim05ne]

Only just saw your reply, so happy that they've found what is causing all your symptoms and angry that they kept fobbing you off. Hope you get sorted out soon and start feeling better. I had my ct scan last week so waiting for results. Did you have a ct scan or ultrasound?