One day I just started getting paranoid. My anxiety started when I lost my job and I was doing well. Then once my wife got pregnant I just started to get scared because what if I don't find a good job before the baby comes ? I just landed a job that requires me to deal with quotas and numbers (stress) and I will be the manager. But I am just taking it because I need the money and can't be picky right now. But around the year ending all these celebs with heart issues etc and people just dropping like flies and I just started to obsess over my health. I set up doc appointments she says everything is good but then I always doubt them. She says I'm healthy and I just still check my heart rate all the time. Now I have a strict diet not to get I'm shape but a strict diet to try to just stay healthy. I just become depressed. I know 3 guys that just posted a post on Facebook and they passed away the same day. It just freaked me out. I'm always paranoid. I'm always thinking WHAT IF. I can't enjoy anything because I'm always thinking "what the point? Anything can happen anytime" idk if its just me being stressed with life and not pulling my weight that's making me think all these weird thoughts. When life is decent I dont think this way but whenever I'm stressed I think all type of weird scary stuff. Like I'm walking on eggshells . I hardly leave my house only to Doctor office, store, barbershop and to pick up my wife and child. I dont go anywhere anywhere for leisure. I'm afraid to stay home alone in case I stop breathing or some type of issue. Eveeyrime I see someone is sick I check symptoms and think I have those symptoms and have that issue. I can't sleep, I go to bed at 11pm dont sleep until 4am because I'm online researching this shit all day smh then I wake up around 5 and my chest feels tight heart is pounding I get scared then turn on the television and Its always a church informercial then I start thinking its a sign that something is wrong. I end up wide awake reading amxiety stuff. Then I fall asleep like 6 then wake back up at 9 and I stay wide awake until 4-5pm I don't leave my bed only to eat and Piss. Smh I literally can't get out my bed, I get up to clean my room I put two things away and end up right back in bed doing this smh. I feel miserable. My chest is tight 24/7, I feel like a robot I feel like I'm in a movie when I go outside it looks weird, my legs are weak, when I'm outside feels like my heart is POUNDING, I get in my car I feel so anxious thinking if I'm alone I can have a issue with my heart, or brain. Smh all the "what if' thinking. I used to have so much fun. I dont get haircuts, I don't shop anymore, I hardly have sex with my wife, not to be graphic I dont even have erection much because my mind is so occupied. My mind doesn't stop thinking of danger or bad stuff. I can't have conversations with people with thinking some weird shit in the back if my head. I dont like being alone when just a few months ago I was gonna go on a whole trip by myself! I'm scared of everything! I avoid parties, going to family events I even had an interview for a better job than I was offered this am and I didn't even go. I doze off during the day. I hardly eat... I just feel like shit and always scared. Sometimes my arm feels numb, my face gets numb. I can't stay out of my bed for more than 20 min. My room has been my sanctuary for over a month now.... Does anyone experience all this???