Hi I'm new here and id just like to address the levels of anxiety I've been felling/felt.
A couple of months ago i felt myself becoming more anxious over daily activities such as walking into school and having to go to job interviews and i would regularly walk in a different way or skip it all together, Although these are normal things for teens to worry about i still felt it was different to the normal everyday nervousness. Then it gradually started to get worse as it was now effecting my health, i became ill quite a lot and started getting headaches and rapid heart beat as i would constantly dwell on things that where going to happen or even happened years ago. I told my parents and friends and tried to follow their advise, i pushed myself a lot more and i felt it slowly getting easier, up till a couple of weeks ago i was carefree and happy and it felt so fresh to not have to worry about every little thing. Until my friends and i started to get closer to new people and going out with them a lot more, not to mention my friends where also maturing and gaining more mature friends as every 18 year old should. Expect i was left behind and i'm immature, i don't wear makeup or high heels and I'm not a very girly person, causing me to get lost in my larger group of friends. I recently went out with friends to bars to have drinks and of course I'm not the drinking type the first couple of bars were fine as i had two friends that i was constantly with and felt comfortable with. In one bar my two friends went missing, i had horrible thoughts and feelings like it was the send of the world, i was worried about where they were, who they were with, if they were okay and most what i was going to do, should i go home? i couldn't dance by myself and my other friends where just getting on with other people so i didn't want to hover, Therefore the rapid heart beat came back and i was a nervous reck for a good 20 minutes until they came back and i never left there side all night. This makes me feel stupid and needy and although i know my friend isn't bothered i feel like i ruin their time out. After this night i didn't want to go to for a while even though there was another party 3 days later and all my friends where going, this night of course was the night they all stuck together and had a really good time which also made me feel anxious and like I've let them down, i also felt out of the loop which makes me uneasy. Today i woke up after a stressful dream, i canceled plans with my friends as i felt too anxious to go out but now i feel even worse as i feel I've left them down, I also have my 3rd driving test next week, i have to collect my a level results Thursday and see if I've been accepted into my chosen university and I've been invited to go out again Thursday night. Although this is only a couple of hours of my week i feel like i have no time left and when my driving test is over my life will be too, i know this sounds stupid but having things to do stresses me out but then when i have nothing to do i feel like its all over. Am i just going through a bad patch or will i stay this way until university, and then what? Does anyone have any tips for going into university with an anxiety disorder?
Sorry if my grammar is bad or it was hard to read!