Really bad day...

[gemp54]

I've been doing so well recently and I thought I was finally getting some control but the last few days I've crashed again. I'm currently taking some tablets from the doctor for acid reflux but it doesn't seem to be working and I'm starting to get worried again. I know I need to give it time and that I might just need to try a different medication or dose (I'm on the lowest) but all I can think is the worst. I have a gland up in my neck which to be honest may have been there for years (I have always suffered badly with throat infections, tonsillitis etc so my glands in my neck are probably ruined by now!) plus the reflux (if thats what it is) is giving me an inflammed throat which is probably a very reasonable cause for glands to be up but I've pretty much convinced myself I'm dying. I want to go back to the doctor and talk about trying some different meds and also about my anxiety but I feel like if I do it in the same appointment they'll just put my worries down to anxiety and not actually check me out properly so I'll continue to worry but if I don't talk about it, the anxiety wont get addressed. I'm constantly tired which makes me worry more. I don't have insomnia or trouble sleeping but my every waking moment is spent uptight and obsessing over this so I think I'm just mentally drained. I don't know what to do and I cant see a way out of this. I'm a bad wife and mother like this, I just want to bethe happy easy going person I used to be. I'm sat in work trying to concentrate and chair meetings and all I want to do I go home and sleep until this all goes away.

[Angep Star]

Hi, have you had some blood tests done recently? If not you should ask for some. It could be a vitamin defficienciey. Your bound to feel run down with constant throat problems. If you don't mind me saying so you could do with some you time!! Have a massage or get your nails done!! Just something for you!! We get bogged down with work, looking after our families and are way to hard on ourselves causing us stress which more often than not seems to attack the weakest part of your body!! Don't be afraid to go to the doctors again, that's what they are there to do to help reassure us 🙏🏻

[gemp54 in reply to Angep]

hi Angep, thanks for your response. I haven't but I will ask them tomorrow. I've also had low iron a few times so I was going to ask about that too. I definitely do need me time. The problem I have is that I work full time in a very demanding job, have 2kids to run around after and my husband works shifts so I do a lot of it by myself. I keep being really determined to make time for myself but when I do, something else suffers and I end up even more stressed than when i started. I really need to find a way around that! I just hope I get some reassurance or help at the doctors tomorrow. It sounds stupid but sometimes I get myself so worked up about going to the doctors-what should I say, what if they don't help, what do I need to ask them- that its worse anxiety than what I'm going about! Xx

[Angep Star in reply to gemp54]

When you've had your blood tests done ask for a copy of the results , I was advised to do so. I'd never thought of it myself but it's a good idea so you can see what they are like. The range from what they consider ok to the top end can be quite considerable and does have an impact on how you feel. That said working full time and having 2 little ones to run round after is exhausting.dont be too hard on yourself!! Your human and can only do so much in a day!! If there's a few things you want to ask your gp write it down. I have done so in the past, it's better than walking out and thinking damn I forgot to ask such and such!! Feeling the way you do won't last for ever!! It will get easier!! Time goes so quickly and before you know it your children will be grown up and youl find you have free time for yourself. Good luck with the doctor, hope he can put your mind at rest x

[Angep Star in reply to gemp54]

I forgot to say if you ask for blood tests they will check your iron, mine drops quite low from time to time. I take ferogloblin capsules from boots. Anyone can take them they are a good tonic especially if you've been tired and under the weather. I can't tolerate iron tablets off the doctor but these are OK for me x

[Kainan]

No, you are certainly not a bad wife or mother. Your thoughts are lying to you by causing you to think the worst of yourself. Thoughts are very powerful, and along with anxiety, anyone can drive themselves mad conjuring up all kinds of hogwash. Its very important during times of stress to calm yourself down by taking many deep breaths and to take better care of yourself by making you happy. But with that being said, you may very well have very real medical problems as you've described, and in that case you must see a doctor to see what can be done.