does social anxiety prevent you from work?!

[sam0191]

Hey

I left my collge because of my socia anxiety and i even could not imagine my self working in any job...dont know what to do i am really broked... i have no motivation in my life now...did anyone face the aame think and wha u did to solve that

[Kainan]

Hi Sam. I went through the same thing. I had to leave college and my job for many months because I was just so anxious and had no self confidence. I understand where you're coming from and I empathize with you. Getting back on track is an entirely uphill battle that you must put in the work and you have to want to do it. Sometimes you just have to do the things that your mind tells you you can't do. It's about structuring an exposure hierarchy, start with something small, and then increase it, then increase it again, until you feel comfortable with being uncomfortable. You say you have no motivation. I feel motivation has a lot to do with values. What is most important to you right now in life? what do you value?

[sam0191 in reply to Kainan]

but i cant be with lot of people n work and if i work in some placed which has one person and me i could not continue in that place more than week because my social anxiety keep me very uncomfortable their ....well now one of the most importnt in my life is i work on my website project from home(as i learnt how to code from home after i left the colege) but my mom keep asking me about college and keep insist that i have to work...the problem is she still dont know that i left the college becaue i know that she will react very strong against me and i cant handle that case emotionally..i told her about my social anxiety and that it prevent me from work but she still think that it is not a reason for not going to work and that i dont want to work, but she dont uderstant that i really hate my current.case that i am 23 and not working and not.live and making money so that keep me upset...so i m trying to build my own site and start a business but i keep thinking that i will go into same trouble if i launch it succefully and hired some people in th future which i fear that i will not be able to deal with them...and these overthinking keep destroying my motivation..i fear from the upcoming on the future.

I hate that i am not working, i really want to be able to live like any normal person work and make money and see people but it is very difficult to me...i go to doctor from couple of month ago and he gave me bills..it helped me a little bit for period of time but now i am like in the past no change!!dont know what to do

[Kainan in reply to sam0191]

It sounds like not working and making money is really upsetting you. Maybe you should begin from there. If you left a job, is there any way for you to contact them to let them know what's been going on? I had to do that and I was lucky that my boss was very understanding. You just never know for sure until you ask.

You write that you're thinking of starting a business of your own, but feel that you won't be able to deal with people whom you'd potentially hire. i think that's great what you're trying to do, but you're overthinking things. It's good to have some forethought into the future, but if it overwhelms you and causes you problems right now then it is surely not worth your time. This is actually called future tripping: worrying about the future that it causes you problems in the present. A quote i frequently repeat to myself is: "the best preparation for tomorrow is by doing your best today."

[sam0191 in reply to Kainan]

yes, I see a lot of people working and making money while I cant start working in new job and that make me feel sad..and the overthinking of fear from the future is hitting me sometimes and it hard to avoid...maybe because I had bad times in the past with my anxiety...but I dont know how to overcome or reduce it...I am thinking to visit new doctor again..maybe he would help me reduce it...which type of doctors is the best to deal with that?...

your quote is some how motivated me...I dont have any choice for now but to working on that website...it making me feel better sometime when i work on that...but in general I am not happy with my life

[Kainan in reply to sam0191]

If you talk to your GP I'm sure he can hook you up with a specialist. I recommend a psychiatrist or a psychologist who does work with anxiety. Finding the right therapist to work with you is so so important to recovery. They have to be someone you feel you can trust and honestly open up to. I'm glad you have something in your life you feel passionate about. That really gives us that extra motivation to get up each day. Just focus on one day at a time. Good luck

[sam0191 in reply to Kainan]

thank u, will take your advice and will search a good doctor wish it would help...thanks agin, appreciate that

[Stay_strong85]

I had to walk out on a good paying, full benefit 10 year career because of my anxiety, panic, and fear. It completely took over my life. 😧

[sam0191 in reply to Stay_strong85]

Yes and I left my college for the same reason..it is really bad...feel like my anxiety is taking away my future..!! what u do now? could u advice me for anything to do...I want to do something to change my life for better I feel that there is nothing to do...I will try to visit a new doctor to see If he can help me!! I dont have so much hope but will give it a try

[Stay_strong85 in reply to sam0191]

NEVER LOSE HOPE. 😏🙄☺ There IS ALWAYS hope. As for me, I have a stay at home job now, wayyyy less pay, and no benefits, but it is better than nothing. I still feel useful and do my best to enjoy life. You will find your solution too! 😊If I did you will. 😋😉

[sam0191 in reply to Stay_strong85]

thanks... it make me feel better to listen from u, u gave me some little hope

[Jonnyq]

I have done Anxiety, panic attacks as well for 2 months my first attack happend at the mall, and a few days later at work, I never had problems talking in a large crowd or too random people when I didn't have anxiety.

Anyways when I had my attacks at work, I felt like there was "danger" at work, I work the graveyard shift without anyone in my side of the building, beside IT guy in the office, I just felt completely dizzy, light headed, anxious, matter of fact the dizzy spell was actually my first symptom once I feel dizzy, I panic so now I avoid places that made I had my attacks at, I lost my job because of anxiety.

[sam0191 in reply to Jonnyq]

Yes that what was happening to me at work...and add to that to me it is hard to interact socially with a lot of people at the same place(with crowd) it destroyed all of my motivation to work...I still remember when I go to work for the first time in my life with a lot of motivation..but it was going away everytime and now there is not motivation at all...

what to you do now?could you advice me for anything to do...I have no idea what to do instead of going to new doctor..but I have no big hope because the first one didnt help me a lot and now everything like the begining!!

[Stay_strong85 in reply to Jonnyq]

Don't worry, you WILL get back up on your feet. Sometimes in baby steps like me, but it is possible for us all. 😚I am terrified of the public now because i have had many big panic attacks in public, but I keep trying even if it's forcing myself to go walk around a store until I can't take it. Try anything, it helps.

[sam0191 in reply to Stay_strong85]

thakss...i will keep trying maybe in the end i will be better,

[alfie19]

Do not think how bad you are feeling as this only makes you feel worse.

Think of what you can achieve and the money you will get paid and the friends you can make if you find it hard to make friends do it slowly there are a lot of people in the same situation who find they are nervous doing new things and meeting new people but it is a challenge we all have to face in our lives. Think of it as one step forward to a new beginning and a new you.

You will surprise yourself what you can do. Take small steps and small challenges to overcome and congratulate yourself when you have accomplished something you were afraid of.

A lot of it is the fear of the unknown but once we take that first step its not that bad and we have done it. Be very proud of your achievements.

If it helps make a list of all the things you wish to do and gradually do them.

Life is an adventure and an exiciting one by holding back we are only hurting ourselves.

I know I have been there it was a very long learning process for me and I have now come a long way to help others.

Best of Luck Please do not hold back you have so much to look forward to do not let others stand in your way. Be strong you can tackle anything you want.

I found writing a daily journal in a notebook when I needed to off load when not having anyone to talk to I thought I was going nuts. I have met a lot of people now who also write journals about what things are bothering them to help find a way to overcome the problem and yes it is great therapy. The only person who needs to see the journal is yourself .

By off loading your mind in the notebook or talking before we go to sleep is a good way of relaxing and easing the mind as sleep is very important for us to face the next day.

Meditation also works listening to soft music to give you upliftment.

There are many challenges we have to face in life that is part of our adventure.

As one door closes another opens to face maybe the same challenge but never give up for you are a strong person who deserves happiness others who make us sad are only jealous just walk holding your head high you will make many friends but there will only be a few true friends and this site is a true blessing to many people who need help and have no-one to turn to we are all here to help one another.

I hope this helps you. Read the Book

"The Road Less Travelled" by M. Scott Peck

(ISBN: 8601404277887) from Amazon's Book Store.