I haven't always had anxiety. It started about 5 years ago at around Christmas time. We were at a family members house and I had the norovirus. (Idon't even like talking about it, eekkkk!!!!) I was really ill but a few days later it passed, None of my family caught it (thank god!) but I was left pretty scarred by the whole experience. For about a year after I would refuse to go to bed and have panic attacks every night because I was so scared of being sick. I would have about two hours of sleep each night and I would go into school the next day looking like a frickin panda because I was so tired. The days were fine because I didn't associate the days with being sick but the nights were pure hell for me and my parents. Even five years on I still worry everyday about getting ill and I am totally paranoid about germs. I carry hand sanitiser with me and I don't like touching door handles. I get worried about going round other people's house and I'm scared of sleeping in places other than my own house. My mom and twin sister don't know how to cope with it and just call me weird and shout at me which makes it all seem 100x worse. My dad is amazing and helps as much as he can but even he can't cope sometimes. It upsets me that I can't just be normal and join in with life just because of this stupid event that happened half a decade ago.
I want to be a doctor but I'm too scared if someone pukes on me. I wish wish wish that this wouldn't hold me back because it's ruining my life. How can I move on?