I can't handle this anymore, I feel like killing myself over this.
Everything around me looks different.Its kind of hard to explain on what's happening to me.I feel like I am going crazy.When I am walking somewhere or doing something, I can't feel myself controlling my actions.My body feels numb, I mean I can still feel things but it just feels numb.I have been zoning out a lot, and forgetting where I am at.When I touch my face or arm, it doesn't feel like I am touching myself. When I look into a mirror, it doesn't look like me.It feels like I am stuck in my body, like I am stranger to my body.It is worse when I wake up, I wake up completely panicking becaus I feel so detatched from my body, it doesn't feel like like my body.I had some experience when I just woke up and I had an out of body experience.When I am doing something or walking somewhere I kind of black out, like forget where Im at.I'm always getting pressure in my head.I keep closing my eyes a lot because my eyelids feel heavy.I get brain food.It just everything looks weird, like something is off.It gets worse when I am in like orange lighting or bright light.I don't feel in control of my body, I feel like a zombie.I don't feel aware of my surroundings I feel not consciousnesses.I am scared I going to wake up one day and forget who I am.I feel like Im just a pair of eyes.I feel like time is going fast.I am scared to take any medication for headaches etc or go somewhere or do anything because I feel like it will make it worse.I feel like I am literally going crazy, everything just seem so unreal.I also get thought about questioning about life.Feels like I am watching my life from a different perspective, feeling as if I am not taking part in it.It happens everyday,it worse when I am panicking but when I am cal I still get those symptoms.I feel tired all the time.It just feels like I am high all the time.It is non stop.And when I am talkimg or eatig something it doesnt feel like I am doing those things.I have thoughts about how it will never end, and that scares me, how I won't go back to feeling normal, and how theres nothing wrong with me and I am just going crazy.it just stresses me out, and I don'tkknow what to do.
I need help please.
I though it could be another symptom to pituirary gland tumor I have because I was getting a bunch of other symptoms but my neruosergeon said my symptoms aren't part of the tumor since there isn't anything wrong with my hormones.
I also been dealing with anxiety, could it just be anxiety, my mom says it probably my anxiety and the stress, or could it be that I go to bed really late at 5 or 6 in the morning and waking up at 2 or 4 in the afternoon. I don't what do you guys think?Please someone help me, I feel suicidal and just ending everything.