Hello!

Hello, you are all so brave talking about your worries on here and your conversations are always supportive and understanding. I shall try my best to help in any way I can. You have inspired me to tell you a bit about me.

I have always had a problem with people being close to me, physically and emotionally. Mental abuse from family played a part in my problems but the feeling of being repugnant and disgusting both inside and out became impossible to ignore. Boyfriends would quickly lose interest as any kind of closeness made me physically sick. My life became one large lie, with me making up stories to make me seem normal. I have been diagnosed with social anxiety, claustrophobia, ocd (intrusive thoughts), agoraphobia and Panic attacks are a daily nightmare. I live alone, I am alone and I will die alone. I am broken and nobody can fix me.

Sorry that got a little more intense than I intended, gonna stop now sorry xxx

12 Replies

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  • Hi hope your doing well , I think I have social anxiety too . I get really nervous to talk to people , I really Try just to mind my own business due to I hate how it feels. I also push my husband away when he wants to show affection. I don't know why I just have no control over it. !!!

  • Thanks for replying notalone8 :) the feeling of having no control is horrible and soul destroying, I hope it gets better for you. At least you have a husband, someone who has seen through to the unique and wonderful person inside and loves you for it. Good luck xx

  • Thank you yes he has a lot of patience with me. I know I have a lot of metal issues that I'm just figuring out. Hope u feel better I'm try to control this anxiety and panic attacks it drives me nuts . :)

  • You should be very proud of yourself because you just let us in and we are all here for you ! Baby steps and you took a huge one !

  • There is support here from people going through similar experiences and so are truly understanding of what you think and feel.Those lucky enough to not suffer from a mental illness will never really understand how the various conditions can make you feel.Wishing you better times- you are not alone x x

  • Thankyou to everyone who replied, you have made me feel welcome and accepted :). Anything I can do for you guys, I'm here xxx

  • Welcome and thanks for posting. I hope with the help you receive from the lovely group of people you will feel better. Hugs xx

  • Hi how has your weekend been? Our little girl has had sickness bug, but she is a bit tonight. I spoke with Wayne's Mum and had to bie my tongue if you know what I mean. Anyway sorry. Have you experienced Depression with your endo before? Although my recovery is going OK and I am trying to be positive about the future, certain family members don't seem to be bothered which currently I find hard.

    Anyway take care. And try to speak next week.

    Kozys

  • I live alone too and am currently experiencing high anxiety levels and very very low mood. you are not alone. We are all in this together. It is sometimes very hard not having someone around but this site is very helpful and such a lovely community of people. Look up at the stars and realise we are all looking up together and we are all under the same stars together wherever we are, alone or with partners. Xxx much love xxx

  • Hi how are you? Have had nasty. Bug last night and all I want to do. Is sleep. Will speak later when feeling a bit better.

    Take care

    Kozys

  • Hi how are you getting on ?

  • Hi kozys, I'm ok Hun. Sorry to hear about your bug, hope your feeling better xx

    It's really ironic caus I have agraphobia and usually can't go out very far, my life has been turned upside down because of the broken ankle. The irony being I now long to go out!! Because I have to keep my leg elevated all the time, I only go from my bed to the toilet and back again and it's driving me crazy! A couple of days ago I lost my balance and fell again hurting my bad ankle, I'm such a twit. Anyway I'll shut up now and stop feeling sorry for myself. It could be a hell of a lot worse.

    Take care

    Chocolisk xx

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