i told my boyfriend i wouldn't cut my wrists. i lied.
i was in my room putting my makeup on, i started crying for nothing, no reason at all. i started over thinking about daft things that had happend in the past and i ended up taking the screw out of my eye pencil sharpener.
i cut my wrists open, i know i should of been strong but ii felt good watching my pain drip out.
iv got a bandge over my wrist so my dad doesnt see, or my step mam, i deffo sont want my 6 year old brother to see them either.
im sick of this, my head goes all over, like a rollercoaster, first its goes up so im happy then theres a sudden drop and im layed on the ground.
Written by
qwerty0
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3 Replies
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Hello qwerty
Welcome to the site
I am sorry to see you suffering
Are you getting any help
It would be a good idea to see your GP , maybe you have , but if not , I do hope you do
You mentioned your past , & how this made you feel , to cause you to SH , counselling even if you have had some before would be a huge help , to deal with these feelings
I dont SH , but have suffered with anxiety OCD , & other things & no its all a way of trying to deal with our feelings
There are members though that have & I am sure they will give you better advice when they see your post
Please , make sure you keep the wounds clean & if you are in any doubt seek medical attention
Keep talking on the site , you will get lots of support & understanding
Love
whywhy
xxx
I agree qwerty. Please seek help. Cutting is a form of release for mental pain. It can become habit forming. And it can be dangerous as well as leaving you with life long scars. Please see your doctor. He/she won't dismiss your symptoms and should be able to help. Don't try and manage on your own.
I'm a cutter too so I can begin to understand what you're going through.
Please don't feel guilty. You didn't lie to your bf. When you said it you meant it but the urge to harm is very strong and sometimes we slip.
It's what you do now which is important.
Firstly if your wounds are significant or you are loosing blood go straight to A&E. I know you don't want to but please don't gamble with yr life. If you're ok keeping your injuries clean and covered should be enough.
Secondly go and see your doctor on Monday and tell them what happened. By then it's likely you'll feel much calmer and will be telling yourself it'll never happen again but please take the advice of someone who didn't go when she should have and go anyway. Get help and support now when you really need it.
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