How do I find hope for the future? I’m stuck in a loop of not wanting to be here, not feeling like I’m capable of holding down a job,(I have a full time job that I struggle going to everyday) and not finding joy in anything I do.
I also struggle with severe anxiety that makes it hard to get out, drive, be social. Which are all things that would seem to help,maybe? How do I find hope that things will get better?
Hello Bluey04. I am brand new to this forum and just read your post first and I share some of your feelings of being stuck in a loop and struggling with even coming to work, lacking ability to find joy. The anxiety keeps me tired and makes going out or being social extremely difficult. I feel like an utter failure and my negative thinking tells me I wasted my life, but I don't know how to not waste it because the anxiety either keeps me from doing things, or the things I manage to do (like go to a creative sobriety meeting, try a brainspotting therapist) prove disappointing & unhelpful, which reinforces my inclination to not go try such things. The best relief so far is connecting with others who share similar feelings so I don't feel quite so alone and crazy. The other thing is I have to celebrate the tiniest "wins", even if they don't seem like much (a few moments of relief from the negative thoughts or a passing breeze that brings some comfort). Just sending out some empathy and care for you today.
Thank you for sharing. I often feel like I’m wasting my life and wonder what my life would look like if I didn’t struggle with such things. Thanks for making me feel less alone! Sending care to you as well!
I’m 50yo and I have had my anxiety and depression all my life. I am ALWAYS upset about wasting my life and feeling like I continue to do so. It’s not like self pity, more like a frustration. I really think my only answer is acceptance (easier said than done, otherwise there wouldn’t be a form of therapy that focuses on it lol). I look back at my grandmother and other people in the small town I grew up in. In those days is was perfectly acceptable to have a very simple life. Things didn’t change much day to day, and something like knitting would be a past time. No one questioned their own self worth, this was what it was to live and it was perfectly acceptable. I try to think of those people when I feel regret for not doing anything in my life.
Hi Bluey04, I just joined this forum too. Lately I've been watching YouTube videos about how to regulate. I like Heidi Priebe and the Crappy Childhood Fairy so far. They break down what's going on emotionally really well and it makes me feel like there's hope for me. I also am triggered by going out and being social. This week I reached out to a ToastMasters club because I've heard the people at those places are really nice, supportive, give helpful feedback, and there's isn't pressure to speak when you don't feel ready. I got tired of trying to socialize but frequently getting triggered. I hope toastmasters will be like socializing with training wheels.
I would recommend Dare by Barry McDonagh and he also has YouTube videos on anxiety. That has really helped me with my anxiety. Which in turn helped with my depression.
When I was a teenager I thought I would be stuck like this forever. My prison would be my room. I was a late bloomer. Didn't get my driver's license until my mid 20s. But I started going to a 24hrs gym at night when hardly anybody was there and it slowly build my confidence. Eventually I started doing little things on my own. Just focus on the step and not the entire staircase.
I found myself traveling by myself on an airplane. I never thought that would happen in a million years! I thought my life would just be me by myself. Just barely living. Wondering if I could have been something great and be doing exciting things if weren't for anxiety. Then I cry myself to sleep because I thought this is my life. Who knew with the right therapist and book, I be going places. And doing things I have only dreamed of.
Wishing you healing and peace 🫂 ❤️
I feel the same way. I care too much about what people think of me. I feel like I am not good enough at anything. I cry a lot. So you are not alone.
All you can do is wake up and hope today the day the world will change. Don’t give up on hope.
Howdy and welcome Bluey. I am so sorry that you are feeling the way you are. Sometimes it is so hard to go on. I wouldn't wish the hopelessness on my worsy enemy, I think it is the worst feeling we can experience as humans. I have spent countless days just barely going to work, eating crap, going to sleep, and doing nothing else and avoiding my family because I felt helpless and worthless...
I think these desperate emotions show us that things have to change if we are going to carry on. Not necessarily anything outside of ourselves, but how we view ourselves. I chase worth by trying to earn it by exercising, eating right, going to work, then working on school to try to increase earning potential after work. F***** up right? Why the hell would any of these things contribute to my worth as a human? Anyway, I think we need to find out what we are trying to do that is hopeless (in my case trying to earn worth every day). We all have worth as human beings just existing. You are not alone. When it got really bad a couple of years ago I quit my job because I just couldn't anymore. My wife got me in to a treatment center. It was a financial blow, but better than wishing I was dead. Hang in there, sometimes a victory for the day is just continuing to live. Sending you peace and love Bluey.
I like David Burns work, the book "Feeling Great" and the Feeling Good podcast. I am also working right now on self-compassion and reading the workbook on self compassion by Kristin Neff and another guy. There is hope, we can change our thoughts and perceptions. ☮️
hi I think it's very true there's those pressures that are different to us these days or adverts and social media et cetera that we take in Inadvertently. It's to be aware of these e.g. I don't watch much of the news or very sad things on telly especially before going to bed because then I wake up sadder
I find writing it down however you feel just get it down on paper make yourself a brew and throw the paper away shredded or burnt it can feel quite therapeutic. It doesn't matter what is on that paper nobody will see it. Sometimes it's just rambling thoughts I've let go with a few issues that way.. About how you feel, not understanding how you feel, et cetera.
there's also chances that you are deficient in certain minerals and vitamins so it's worth having blood blood check my niece was saying that she was at the bottom of the iron range in the blood test, but the doctor said that's fine you're in range so she said that she would like to be in the middle of the range😊 she feels a lot better now. She's had iron for another six months. It's just an example how supplements can help. I know I was on my knees before I knew my vitamin D was almost deficient and my B12 was low as well. I was crawling up the stairs but after two weeks of supplementing I could walk upstairs upstairs again and I didn't feel as low. So these things are important to I had a low thyroid makes a heck of a difference with med. There is Health unlocked for thyroid pernicious anaemia and lots of others.
sometimes it's just it's just a need to talk. I felt a bit empowered when I realised it's your thoughts that cause your emotions! Maybe see counter book that takes your Fancy I read one called the happiness habit 🤔. Also joined a group called freedom from fear, it was wonderful at the time as I began to understand my anxiety as it was irrational most anxiety is, You have heard of the fight or flight syndrome, with worrying too much you can get stuck in the flight so anything that's relaxing taking your mind off it e.g. a good film a good book a massage yoga tai chi blah blah can start to turn things around
lots of good wishesx
yes, change takes a little time but by working on it, it does change🥰
Overwhelmed 
22 years old, no hope left. 
Don’t worry be happy
How the heck?
