Shocking as it seems ,but a few people on HU have only one thing in sight, and that is to fight and cause disharmony and i have been the brunt of their venom even when i have tried to defuse the situation with consideration, and yet they will not let go of their angst.
Everyone on HU are struggling in areas of their lives , some suffer anger, illness and some with deep sadness, and rather than putdowns we have to show compassion and care but nowhere in the mix should we slate anyone's beliefs, but i understand that some people are on a knife edge and will attack the weakest among us, but that is no way to behave.
I have belonged to Heath Unlocked for many years and its only recently i have encountered any nastiness, and it's very unpleasant, so much so i was on the point of leaving, but no one should give way to bullies.
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I'm very sorry you were upset to the point of almost leaving.
It's very hard to answer your post as it's very general. There have been many trolling incidents here lately. I'm not sure if that's what you are speaking of, if so it is the troll causing the problem, not the members of this site.
We all do have our own struggles and need support. Some people come on the forum with fake stories and go into pm with more fake stories and bash members.
Thank you Dolphin.....i think the person who was extremely nasty to me has been removed after i reported it, and i see his comments are now under 'hidden' so i guess he is now gone.?
Yes it did happen in this community......but Mandy also left because of the spiteful comments made to her.........but glad she is now back with another name.
There are so many people with so many personalities here. These things have been going on for quite some time. I guess it's near impossible to have constant peace.
I wish you well and thank you for the post drawing attention to the situation
I have had spiteful comments made to me as well on some of the other boards like getting accused of being supposedly bitter after my father died back in 2021.
I also got told to be grateful as well when I dared to say I was upset about losing that job in the pharmacy!
Thing is its not fun is it when you are really looking forward to things thinking you are getting things and then no you aren't like what happened recently at the care home!
This morning I had a nice early walk out and ended up feeling sorry for those at the care home who bullied me as they are very very unhappy people who are angry over their lot in life and its better for my health to be sorry for them rather than angry and bitter as I do feel by accident they did me a favour and I deserve better than that scabby employer!
They would order residents around like they were cattle ordering them to get up and one member of staff had told a resident in a rude manner to get out of the kitchen which I didn't think was very nice!
I was right to storm out that Friday night when they shouted at me and I had kicked their back gate in temper as I was so angry at how I was treated as its not nice is it when you look forward to starting a job and have that happen!
Rest of the day has been busy applying to jobs and it's a work review at the job centre tomorrow morning and job hunting and then to swimming.
Good news I have a phone interview with Admiral on Thursday at 9.20am.
At least with 9.20 once it's done its over for the rest of the day!
Baby doesn't like the hot weather either and meows at us to turn the heat down!
Decided to leave the flat early again this morning as I feel it doesn't help staying in as I find anger and resentment starts to build and I start feeling like it's not fair that these things have happened to me which isn't constructive!
It's the job centre at 10.50am which no one likes as it's depressing so decided to come out early then I can just nip over there which is better than sitting in getting more and more worked up and feeling like it's not fair which isn't fair to me!
Better to come early than get myself in a state and be late!
I have applied for some more jobs as well this morning to get it out of the way as it gets depressing!
I wish I had said no to that offer at the care home looking back but I did what I thought was right at the time but that was poor though not putting that offer in writing!
I know now in future should an offer like that come round again I will say no thank you!
Contracts are there to protect everyone involved and when I stormed out that Friday night and kicked their back gate nothing had been put in writing so there was nothing they could do about it as I could legally leave immediately as I hadn't worked a month there and nothing was down in writing!
"Shocking as it seems ,but a few people on HU have only one thing in sight, and that is to fight and cause disharmony and i have been the brunt of their venom even when i have tried to defuse the situation with consideration, and yet they will not let go of their angst."
Trolls aside.
I think we all deal with things differently.
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I'm gonna kinda dip into my previous support group here for a sec.
One thing I learned is that people dealt with problems differently.
Some were passive, some were aggressive, some were more emotional, and some bottled up emotions.
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There's a whole lot more that I wanted to say here, but giving all the examples that I was originally about ready to give (and decided to delete) I think would probably cause more harm than good here.
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All I can say is that we (usually) work the best when we support each other.
& I think that I'm just going to leave it at that for now.
Please don’t anyone leave because of a few bad apples. This is supposed to be a safe haven where we can say whatever is troubling us without judgement. Those few who can’t be supportive are the ones that need to leave. United we stand!
HEALTHUNLOCKED doesn`t have angels the only angels are above the clouds everyone is very much capable of getting things wrong but it`s how we deal with them situations that can make a difference if anyone has issues it`s always best to resolve them with the said persons and move on. bitterness and anger will never make you well.
This morning at the jobcentre I said how I feel strongly that it's not constructive for me to sit at home on a morning getting more and more angry and resentful over things that aren't fair and how I had decided to do an exercise program first thing in the day when I don't have early appointments like walks round the neighbourhood like I did yesterday morning which helped and then went on to do a morning of job applications and they said that the exercise first thing was a great idea and how I'm right that sitting at home sulking about how it's not fair doesn't help matters!
Good news as I have finished my job applications for the day now so it's a sit down with a cup of tea until swimming at 3pm!
I’m relatively new to the forum and so far have found the people to be very nice and helpful. I know how it goes with some online sites though, it seems all people want to do is make others feel bad or cause problems.
You are so right don’t give in to bullies. Just ignore them and know that the majority of people here truly care and want to help.
Sorry you've been made to feel bad by the actions of some, but there's always a Troll or two around. Do your best to ignore them or alternatively, report them. You've been here a long time, I know, but don't let the nasties grind you down!
Must admit, I am now much more careful of whom I reply to as I have had some postings result in a dogpile, and I'm not as active here as I used to be, due to a few.
I think a lot of the misunderstandings result from differences between American English and English, and the way we say things. We are also missing nuances caused by lack of sound and vision, as we do get a great deal of information from facial expression and tone of voice.
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l'm glad he is gone. 
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