My sister said im spoiled!: I was... - Anxiety and Depre...

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My sister said im spoiled!

Against_the_current profile image

I was worried about mom's mental health and just wanted a safe place for me and sis so i putted some Bach flower remedies in mom's water. Really few. Yesterday mom got home and said "idk what u are putting in my water but i have never felt so miserable, i can't drive, I'm mad". I got scared and told dad to drive me to my accommodation today instead of tomorrow. I went out and eventually mom calmed. I calmed too because i thought "she was just hungover, these are harmless, also she drank a lot of liquids and they couldn't have harmed her, she's just using me to hide she's hungover. Her drinking milk instead of beer rn is a proof". So today all day im losing my mind why am i going to my moldy accommodation and mom's at work till 8pm, i could do my game event on sis' laptop because mine doesn't work and because my accommodation's internet is stopping. It's moldy. I jinxed myself. My sister got mad and told me i poisoned mom and she was barely driving (mom avoids driving before i even had remedies) and then she went to the gym leaving with the words "you're spoiled". Sis even thinks mom hit her because of my remedies. I protect her and mom abuses her and she's still on mom's side.She got everything she wanted. I grew up in poverty in post communism. She's 17 and think she knows it all but honestly there's a big difference between 18 and 21. She thinks of herself as a big deal because i took all the bullets for her. And now when im bleeding, she calls me weak and spoiled and says i should get a job.

Everyone is telling me i should move out but i just can't take care of myself and a place. Also im used to home. The vomiting at the sanatorium and the sprained knee killed my independence. The mold in my accommodation burried it. Idk what i will do with my life. Being in your twenties is something she doesn't understand

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Against_the_current profile image
Against_the_current
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6 Replies
SoporRose profile image
SoporRose

AtC,

I know you have a hard time, in your distress, with responses that you feel don't understand your point of view, but dosing your mom without her knowledge and permission is completely unacceptable, dangerous, and might even get you. in trouble if your mom were to get drunk and report what you've done. I try to be supportive of your troubles, but this time you owe your mom and your sister an apology. What would you say if someone were sneaking "remedies" in your beverages?

I am so sorry that your situation has gotten so bad that you lost sight of the potential harm that could have come to your mom and to yourself.

LoveforAll41 profile image
LoveforAll41

I am so sorry Atc... it is hard once primary school is over and you lose that bit of certainty that comes with a routine and school. Being in your 20s can be a huge drag.

I am sorry your situation is so hard. You truly prefer being home to in a moldy place away from home? Perhaps you can work with that choice being made and try to find another option...

Against_the_current profile image
Against_the_current in reply to LoveforAll41

I really don't know what i will do. School is the inly secure thing in my life. And im in my accommodation and I feel sick

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54

I have to agree with SoporRose. Its completely wrong and can be dangerous to put anything in someone's drink so please never do that again.

I wish you could understand that its not up to you to cure your mum's drinking. Hard as it is she is an adult and makes her own choices. She would be much more likely to come to you for support if you accepted her as she is without trying to change her. That can only cause resentment on her part and worry on yours.

As for your sister she has clearly shown that she doesn't need or want your protection, so lay off her as well. Live your own life and do what you want and need to do instead of trying to directs other's lives to your version of what is right or wrong.

I wonder if you are concentrating on them to avoid dealing with your own issues? Have a think about this please and reconsider your position. It would make life much better for you - and for them too. No one gave you the job of sorting their lives out for them so butt out and give them your love and support instead.

Concentrate on you and what you want and need and focus on getting that instead.

I'm sorry if this comes over a bit harsh but I do think it needed to be said. Live YOUR life not theirs. That is their own responsibility, not yours.

Against_the_current profile image
Against_the_current in reply to hypercat54

My life depends on their moods

I didn't say that

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