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fear of losing mind or something else than anxiety is wrong with you

thegoat123 profile image
9 Replies

hi guys. im so exhausted. every time i get over one anxiety symptom a new one comes up. for years, i was stuck inside of my house afraid of panic attacks because i had one in public once. fine. i was okay in the house. fast forward a bit, i had a panic attack inside of my house, and i got so hung up on it, had to go to the ER. came home, and ever since then ive just been a worried mess. i can not stop worrying, and ive worried myself into a new anxiety. my brain, reality, dpdr, psychosis, etc. i am so worried that im losing my mind. i wakeup with a knot in my stomach every single day. having existential thoughts, worried theres something else wrong, feeling detatched from reality, like life is fake and im in a videogame, im so tired of it! this is no way to live. i spend my days in misery. the worst part is i know its all anxiety but the worry and anxious feeling never leaves. i dont even know what life is anymore.

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thegoat123
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9 Replies
LoveforAll41 profile image
LoveforAll41

I am so sorry thegoat, it is sooooo exhausting. You can never relax... Are you interacting with people? I think that my be the most grounding thing that we can do as humans. It is to easy to go for long periods without human interaction now

thegoat123 profile image
thegoat123 in reply toLoveforAll41

due to my agoraphobia i havent interacted with anyone in real life other than my immediate family in years..

LoveforAll41 profile image
LoveforAll41 in reply tothegoat123

Are you going to therapy thegoat? I think that therapy is the way that we really change how we think. I always recommend "Feeling Great" by David Burns. I realize that virtual appointments would be "easier" for you, but I think in person would be a great way to start getting out. You are not alone, there are so many of us that have spent a lot of time shut up in our homes.

thegoat123 profile image
thegoat123 in reply toLoveforAll41

i was trying therapy, but my therapist i was going to had no clue what she was doing. it was a joke. i was telling her about all this massive anxiety i was having 24/7 and she would not listen to me, and she would tell me stupid shit like " go clean out your fridge when you are feeling anxious" ... like lady theres not a time of day where i dont feel anxious or worry..

LoveforAll41 profile image
LoveforAll41 in reply tothegoat123

I am glad that you have had some experience then! There are so many therapists, I would shop around until you feel that you have found one that you like. If I had to go look for one today I would want to do the TEAM CBT modality. Here is the link for their therapists:

feelinggoodinstitute.com/fi...

Agora1 profile image
Agora1

I'm not happy to say that "I get you" thegoat123. Sad but true I experienced the same

thoughts and fears. Health Anxiety is quite common once anxiety takes hold. Anxiety

plays with our mind by giving us another symptom just as we recognize the last one

as anxiety and not a physical cause.

Anxiety lies to us not only with physical symptoms but mental ones while we are

sleeping. That is when the subconscious mind takes over and fills our head with

every negativity possible. Is it not a wonder that we wake up each day in a state of

fear?? Besides the thoughts, we are bombarded by hormonal changes of Cortisol

and Adrenaline reaching high peaks which just add to the distress. (early morning)

You are not going to lose your mind over this. You are stronger than that (with our help).

I remember being Agoraphobic and thinking staying in my house was my escape from fear.

Boy was I wrong. We can't hide or run from Anxiety. It needs to be hit head on.

I realized that when I too would have Panic and Anxiety in the safety of my home.

You see it's not coming from anything real. It's a deep seated lie that anxiety tells us

and we tend to believe it. Once we Accept this as not dangerous and allowing it to

pass over us (as it will), we are one step closer to normalcy.

It's going to be okay my friend. One day at a time, we'll get you there :) xx

thegoat123 profile image
thegoat123 in reply toAgora1

my heart is broken. im only 19 years old and i spend my days alone in misery. so saddened i cant even cry. this anxiety has taken the spark out of life for me. i used to be an athlete, a friend, a happy young man. anxiety banned me to my house due to panic attacks. i said okay, tahts fine because i loved gaming aswell. so i gamed for a few years. i was happy. until one day my anxiety said we cant have you doing that, and then brought this upon me.

MaggieMay61 profile image
MaggieMay61 in reply tothegoat123

Staying grounded in the "Now" has been most helpful to me. Our minds take off on us and we start worrying over what has been and what will be rather than living in the moment. When I feel overwhelmed, I try to ground myself by feeling the floor under my feet, the soft blanket between my fingers, etc. Little victories help too. After a while you lose your confidence in doing most anything so I try to do something outside of my comfort zone regularly. Even if its something small like walking to a nearby park that I haven't been to before. This gives me some sense of control. Fighting against the anxious thoughts and feelings just makes you more anxious. With acceptance does come some peace of mind. Hope you find your way.

SayNOtoPanic profile image
SayNOtoPanic

so sorry you’re dealing with all this, but know you are not alone. You will rise from it even if you’re in the midst of it at the moment. Do you do therapy at all? Or meditation? Check out the late Dr Weekes work Hope and Help for your nerves. Really spoke to me and addresses acceptance of the fear and all the physical crap it puts us through. Also check out YouTube mindfulness guided or meditation guided. Try deep breathing inhale from the nose slow hold three seconds exhale slow and do that at least a couple times an hour. Prayers to you thegoat123.

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