Been a while

[ashleybakerr01]

Haven't been on here in a month. broke my phone so I needed a new one. It just took a while to get one.

I've been so unhappy for weeks...my depression is hitting an all time low past few days. And it's just hard to get out of bed anymore let alone do anything. My fear of eating comes and goes...it's a stupid loophole I seem to be stuck in 😫. One day in ok and can eat fine, next day I panic at the sight and thought of most foods. I just feel stuck, always. I have no friends really anymore, my closest "friend", she was fake and treated me horribly, ditched me when I lost my baby almost 2yrs ago ..and everyone else who said they'd be there kinda just abandoned me too 😞. I miss my little angels .. September 4th was 2yrs for my first loss...now April 20th is 2yr anniversary of my second loss. And yes I know those are close together, i wasnt thinking and git pregnant too soon after my 1st loss...then lost my other months later. It's hitting me really hard today, and whenever i trt to talk to someone, they just seem annoyed or say well i can't really help you with that. So I just feel so alone in this world 💔

[Stilltrying2]

I am so sorry that you are going through these struggles. Grieving this type of loss is difficult. Everyone handles grief differently, and sometimes it takes us a while to work through it. Please know that you are not alone.

[ashleybakerr01 in reply to Stilltrying2]

Thank you so much ❤️

[LoveforAll41]

I am so sorry ashley, i think something like this will take a long time to get through no matter who you are. It will likely take longer for those of us with other mental illnesses and cognitive distortions as well. ☮️ Please allow yourself to feel your grief, it shows how much you value life and the losses you have had.

feelinggood.com/2019/08/26/...

feelinggood.com/2023/05/15/...

Just a couple of podcasts if you feel like listening to something. I am a big fan of TEAM CBT.

[ashleybakerr01 in reply to LoveforAll41]

Thank you. Grief has a weird way of being if that makes sense. One day I'm ok, next I'm breaking down in middle of a grocery store bc I seen baby clothes 😔💔

[corgi_fan817]

I am sorry you are having such a tough time. It’s ok to grieve. It’s ok to give yourself time. Hugs.