Anxiety is Ruining My Life

[SleepingTurtles]

I am having problems with talking on the phone, asking for help, and the worst of all is terrible health anxiety, and sleep issues. Also, I am a person who "failed to launch" meaning that I struggle to be independent from my family and all due to anxiety. I think I reached my max that I can't handle being in this house anymore, but I am still afraid or paralyzed in some ways to do anything about which is odd.

So anyways my anxiety has worsened because of an incident my sleep has worsened recently, at night I woken up vibrating and not visually or physically shaky and was terrified and wondering why I why my body was vibrating. Also, I felt fine at the time before I attempted to sleep or that is what I thought. As I write this, I feel terrified to sleep again and would like to mention that I went to see a doctor and they are testing blood and cholesterol and took x-rays to see what is up. Now fast forward to today, I feel better today than when I was experiencing those scary moments but occasionally, I think I feel those vibrations on the bottom part of my legs still and not sure if it is real or just my anxiety manifesting those symptoms or something.

Since I still feel anxious about sleeping, I do feel vibrations when I attempt to sleep sometimes, but it is probably me focusing too much and looking for something wrong with me that maybe I am causing my own problems. Also, I do experience shivers also well like if I am cold, but my room is not terribly cold as it probably goes to 58F to 66F and it is probably due to anxiety because I attempting to sleep. What is scary to me is that I never experienced such a thing like it and because I never experience something like it I am freaking out so bad. One thing that make me think it is anxiety is that when I leave the house and go to the park, I feel a lot better mentally and physically. When I say physically, I feel like my muscles tighten up and all of the sudden loosen up from my neck and also legs and it felt like I was doing exercises even though I didn't. once I went to the park and realized how much anxiety I felt being at home.

I currently have not access to a mental health care professional at the moment and trying my best to get one as soon as possible.

Thank you <3 for reading my post and wish me luck on sleeping problems and maybe health problems as there is no confirmation yet whether it is an illness.

My current plan is and any advice is welcomed thank you:

is to get a job (first time getting a job at the age of 27)

finish my degree.

talk to people and make friends.

learn to love myself.

learn to live alone and sleep alone.

[MidnightBriarRose]

Hi, SleepingTurtles. I have gone through almost everything you have experienced in your post. I’m so sorry you are going through that. It sounds like what you are going through is most definitely anxiety. And specifically, health anxiety; which is basically a type of OCD.

I’d like to talk to you more about this, if you’d be interested in talking further. PM me if you’d like to chat. I think I can be of help to you. Take Care.

[Hidden]

You have a great plan and I hope you commit to it. Getting a job helped me overcome the fear of talking to strangers or people in general. What seems scary at first is only overcome by confronting it. Our minds tell us to avoid events as a way of protecting us but we can never grow unless we experience discomfort. Uncertainty is never going to be answered in our minds.

Definitely talk to new people, find common interests, and make friends. Even if they do not become friends, you are getting a benefit either way from practicing and becoming better at socialising.

Independence is another great skill yes. I was afraid of leaving home for university because I had never truly been alone. I did not adapt well at all in the first year. But the mistakes I made were lessons that made me who I am now. To be content in solitude will make you competent in a lot of aspects. I found that if I could take care of myself, I could take care of others properly.

Respecting and loving yourself is important. Be your own support system and never beat yourself up for mistakes. Allow failure and you will get back up. I used to hate myself for failing and I was constantly negative which made me view every little error as a massive deal.

One thing I would highly recommend that helped me was to meditate. Being present relieves a lot of stress and anxiety because they are all a result of overthinking and living in your head. Your perspective on thoughts is made optimistic through meditation by accepting all but not giving any value or attention. You truly get to experience moments and enjoy them when present with your senses. It will help with sleep too. To be in a relaxed state and let thoughts come without forcing them away. I was hindered my whole life by overthinking issues and engaging with doubt. Today reality always turns out better than my mind tells me and that is only because I learnt how to ignore it. At the same time my mind has shifted and the internal chatter is more about supporting me and having confidence that I can achieve.

[SleepingTurtles in reply to Hidden]

Thank you for your response. I will definitely be looking into meditation more and see how it could help me be less worried, be more optimistic, and find joy in life and in the things I currently have.

[Cavalierrubie]

Please, Please Please go to Anxietycentre.com and browse until you find “list of symptoms”. You will be amazed and it will put your mind at rest. Also get a Dr. Claire Weekes book. There are plenty on EBay. People call it their bible. xxx

[SleepingTurtles in reply to Cavalierrubie]

Thank you, I did look into the link, and I am quite surprised of how many symptoms there and I would like to mention I do feel better. Also, I will look into the book later today.