Finding yourself

[kanzler1987]

I am so sick and tired of feeling like everyone’s door mat, getting yelled at for things I didn’t do. Always having to play a character even when I am exhausted. I just want to play me and for people to except me for that person. Not to be someone I am not, aka a character. Ugh. So done. 😶😞🙃😥

[LadyZen]

You shouldn't be anyone's doormat for sure.

[kanzler1987 in reply to LadyZen]

Thank you

[Need2beMeAgain23 in reply to LadyZen]

I totally understand that and I finally made the decision to walk away but now I am facing the my character and reputation as my integrity that he has put me down as thief to his family and went in person to my sister n Neice n son and the amount I suppose stole changes ! My anxiety and depression is starting again

[LadyZen in reply to Need2beMeAgain23]

Sorry to hear that.

[kanzler1987]

Thank you

[Globallove1]

Hello, I'm sorry about your situation. I'm wondering why you feel like you have to be someone else and not be yourself with people? Playing a role is like lying all the time to yourself. Plus, looks like the people you are around don't respect you. Do you need to be around them for a reason? I'm just trying to figure out what you're getting that keeps you on your "character. "

[kanzler1987 in reply to Globallove1]

That is a very long story. But I have mostly played a character from birth on. My childhood was a disaster, and my adolescence was a disaster and my adult life is a disaster. Things I am working on being better with in counseling and my personal time. So. But I hear you with your comment.

[Globallove1 in reply to kanzler1987]

I understand. I also have had a traumatic life. I hope you will find and be true to your authentic self. Don't expect validation from others. It comes from you and only you. Stay strong and take care!

[Downinil in reply to kanzler1987]

I have to say reading that you alter your true character with people to be accepted by them makes me even more determined to be myself around everyone. If they aren’t comfortable with my authenticity they can find someone else to spend time around. I have friends and those people accept me for who I truly am. You might find if you don’t cater to their needs you’ll have more respect from them as well as yourself.

[Spooky99]

I go through the same thing at my job. It’s the worst for our self esteem!!! Try to put a stop to it! This is why I like dogs more then people

[BedBug]

You don't and shouldn't be putting up with this. Doesn't help you at all. My advice is to remove yourself from this situation. Maybe hard at first but your body and mind will thank you. You will see the difference. Good luck.

[catsrock]

I'm sorry to hear you are having such a hard time. You definitely should be free to be yourself.

[Need2beMeAgain23]

sadly I totally understand where you’re coming from unfortunately it hurts and it is exhausting to be someone who you ain’t ! What i did eventually learned to start falling back from them and started focusing on me and be Round people who are positive and accept me!

[Hidden]

It sounds like you are dealing with issues of assertiveness and self-esteem. I would recommend reading a book on learning to be more assertive and also I would recommend the book Feeling Good to cover self-esteem and other issues.

[Pitrovski]

If I'm correct and you are 36, yes, it's time to be more honest to yourself and the world around you and start being you.

Try to take it slow though. Don't bring anger into it; that will just hurt yourself.

Being more yourself brings many great changes but also new and difficult challenges.

For me; getting rid of anger and being more who I wanted to be, opened up an ocean of underlying anxiety.

Good luck,

Love

P