failed trip

[Daisy425]

I am so disappointed in myself. I went on this girls trip and I really just can’t do it anymore. I decided I need to go home a day early. I booked my flight. This is my first time flying alone which is also causing my anxiety. It was difficult for me to decide what to do. Either stay here and be miserable or go home. I know flying alone will make me anxious but I just want to go home.

[RupertBrown]

At least you tried. I have to admit, that kind of trip sounds like a lot. Don't beat yourself up over it.

[Daisy425 in reply to RupertBrown]

have you ever flown alone?

[RupertBrown in reply to Daisy425]

Yes, twice, but I was twelve years old, (long story). I was very scared and nervous, but I'm pretty sure that was due to my age. Almost missed my connecting flight on the way home. If I had to do it now, I'm pretty sure I'd be almost as nervous!

[Daisy425 in reply to RupertBrown]

I have no connecting flight it is direct. I’m a little nervous

[Marysblue in reply to Daisy425]

I ve only ever flown alone.

[emmi331 in reply to Marysblue]

That's pretty much true for me, too. It isn't the flying that bothers me so much as the airports!😟

[Agora1]

Dearest Daisy425, I had read about your plans for the weekend get a way with the girls.

I was hoping that you might be more comfortable being with friends who understood

your issues. I'm so truly sorry you had to cut your trip short. However, I am proud of

you for going by pushing against your fears. Let me know when you are home and how

your flight went being alone this time. I'm proud of you for that as well.

Will be waiting to hear from you. xx

[Daisy425 in reply to Agora1]

thank you so much. My friends are so supportive but I’ve been struggling to feel comfortable. It’s hard bc I have moments where I want to stay. I booked a fully refundable flight for tomorrow morning so I do have time to change my mind but I need to decide. They would be leaving the next day. I just don’t know if I could do another day of this

[Agora1 in reply to Daisy425]

Daisy, sometimes I've noticed just when I'm ready to give up, my mind changes

to a more positive attitude. As you get closer to going home, you may want to

stay just one more day. I'm behind you on whatever you decide. xx

[Daisy425 in reply to Agora1]

I actually ended up canceling the flight and staying because it was so expensive and I thought it was a waste since everyone is just leaving tomorrow morning anyway. However I’m starting to regret that decision as I woke up with bad anxiety

[Agora1 in reply to Daisy425]

Remember Daisy, this is how anxiety controls our life by putting these regrets

and negative thoughts in our minds. You see, you've already won dear by

staying an extra day. You showed Anxiety that you will not be intimated by

what he throws your way. Try to enjoy your last day there knowing that

tomorrow you will be home, sleeping in your own bed as well as having

won this game that Anxiety played with your mind. You're a Winner! xx

[Daisy425 in reply to Agora1]

thank you so much! I am so glad that I stayed and I am so thankful for everyone’s support. This community is truly a blessing.

[AnxiousSilver in reply to Daisy425]

"I booked a fully refundable flight for tomorrow morning so I do have time to change my mind but I need to decide. They would be leaving the next day. I just don’t know if I could do another day of this"

No matter what you decide, I just want to give you credit for trying.

[Artistfriend]

Its a success either way, you were uncertain but did it anyway, that took alot of courage. You have a better idea of what it can feel like for you so you can plan ahead for next time. So many of us have stories just like yours, its part of the struggle. Ive not gone on flights before because of anxiety only to change my mind that day and book and pay again for another flight.

[SusieSoul]

Hi be kind to yourself, wherever you are at is fine. You don't need to do anything you don't want to do. I know whatever you do, it will be the right thing for you. Boss back any negative thoughts, and trust what you know is good for you. You will be just fine. God looks out for his daughters.

[Tealpillow in reply to SusieSoul]

That was the sweetest 🥲

[Daisy425 in reply to SusieSoul]

thsnk you so much ❤️ I’ve been trying to lean on God but I’m not feeling any peace

[Willow2022]

Daisy I am so sorry this trip has caused so much anxiety for you. What was mentioned before is correct: you pushed against your mind telling you a lie and went on the trip. Consider that a win. Whether or not you stay is a different side of the story. You are strong and brave for even going when you know your mind was trying to talk you out of it.

Please let us know when you return and how you are doing.

[Daisy425 in reply to Willow2022]

Thank you so much. I decided to stay the final day as I didn’t want to waste 500 dollars on an early flight

[AnxiousSilver in reply to Daisy425]

Alright, just remember that no matter what, that we are here for you.

[Figgins42]

This has happened to me. Don't feel like a failure! You tried! It just wasn't for you. I know you feel like you're not the fun one or you're uncool for leaving, but trust me, you are not any of those things. I'm sorry you have to fly alone but you'll make it! Tell yourself you got this!! Here for you if you wanna talk...🩷💜🩷💜🩷

[Good_for_us]

I congratulate you on taking this trip! It would have soo easy to just not go (I know that feeling all too well) you did it anyway!! 😊 So, I must disagree with the title of your post - this was not a ‘failed trip’ ! You packed your bag and got on that plane! Even if you had anxiety the whole time, even if you had come home early, it still would have been a success.

[Daisy425 in reply to Good_for_us]

thank you so much!!!

[jonnylongton]

HDaisy, everything you are going through is only natural. You know what , i was scared to death of lflying and it took me 55yrs to do so and that was only cause my partner at the time kept reassuring me ( shes gone, i found out a year ago she was a narcissist, - a yr on im still in love deeply and i miss her so much i feel id do anything to get back, but i know it could be the worst thing i do ).

So what i try to do is concentrate on if it was not for her i never would of been abroad, and i would happily fly every yr if i could afford, so instead of getting anxious and stressed i cuss myself because i cannot go !!! instead of getting anxious of going alone. Ok when i went i was nervous till plane took off, and i got a window seat and i looked out and must of taken 100s of pics and videos by time we got there. there was even some turbulence and she jumped and screamed and i laughed and said "whats up with you its only a bit of turbulence" lol.

So if possible try using reverse psychology and keep going over it in your head and telling yourself what you will be missing, 1- a lovely relaxing well deserved holiday away with the girls, getting a nice tan, and feeling a lot better in yourself because of the rest and also because you beat a fear what is holding you back , and then knowing once youve done it you will do it again as you will know there is nothing to fear...

One thing a psychologist told me which was the best piece of advice ive ever had..

"walk to where you feel your anxiety is worst , then grab your anxiety, shout at it and tell it you are not stopping my good time, im going make you suffer, so grab it, shout, punch it if that makes you feel better, then shove it in your suitcase/luggage/ and tell it its coming with you but staying locked up in the baggage/luggage , then forget about it and go and paint the town red."

hope all this drivel hasnt sent you sleep lol........please try and go and dont let anything beat you , when you get back put a selfie on here, something to be proud of. prayers, hugs, and good wishes sent to you all the way from the UK" x

[Daisy425 in reply to jonnylongton]

thank you so much! The trip definitely wasn’t easy but I stayed the whole time and now I’m home. I’m proud of myself for staying but it was challenging

[emmi331]

We are all proud of you, Daisy! 🥳

[Daisy425 in reply to emmi331]

thank you!!

[Midori]

Personally, if you are not having an enjoyable time, I would bite the bullet and go home.

Life's too short to be miserable and it sounds as if your friends are too busy to realise you are not enjoying yourself.

Ask a stewardess to keep an eye on you if you might panic.

Cheers, Midori