Couplets of Despair

[northwoodboy]

Light flickers as I reappear after a troubled sleep,

To familiar dark thoughts racing though my brain.

The fear and chaos that, without effort, I daily reap

There seems little hope of diminishing the pain.

There was a time when life was full of smiles and fun

A rich perspective of sight, taste and smell.

At what point did I lose sight of the light of the Sun

Descending into this daily earthbound hell?

I spend my days seeking some kind of light.

A book, an affirmation, a bottle or a drug

A desperate hope as I daily live this fight

To escape this bottomless pit I have dug.

I believe there is an answer out there,

A recipe that takes me away from all this pain.

Finding the secret is still frustratingly rare

If I find it I will have a lost life to regain.

[2L84x]

I think that is beautifully written. But the feelings are painful. I sometimes feel that I have dug my bottomless pit too, but is that really true? I don't think we consciously make choices that we think will make us unhappy. But I've made so many wrong choices and eventually they led me to this point. If I had known what the result would be, I would have chosen differently...