New psychiatrist so cold

[Roxylox]

My usual psychiatrist was away today.The new one asked for my history and present story and showed no compassion, no kind words at all. There's a chance l will see him again next time , l hope not. He ruined my day.

[kenster1]

he should be reading your background before he meets you so he`s got an idea of what your issues are sounds a bit un professional to me hopefully next time it`s your usual support worker.

[Roxylox in reply to kenster1]

I really hope so. I left that room far more down than when l went in.

[AnxiousSilver]

I'm sorry to hear that.

[Roxylox in reply to AnxiousSilver]

Thanks AnxiousSilver

[Dolphin14]

Roxy

I'm sorry this happened. I hope he is more professional when you see him next.

❤️🐬

[Roxylox]

Thanks Dolphin. I hope so too. A little compassion on his part wouldn't hurt.

[emmi331]

Tell him if you see him again how he made you feel. If no one speaks up he is unlikely to change.Is it possible the guy doesn't usually see patients one on one, but was pressed into service while your regular therapist was away?

[Roxylox in reply to emmi331]

I suppose that is possible, it sure felt thst way. I wouldn't have the courage to tell him how he made me feel.

[bethelbee in reply to Roxylox]

I have no problem telling a doctor, whether psych or otherwise, how I felt about their care, or lack of it. I've done it on several occasions. It's my body and mind they're messing with. I've told doctors/providers how rude they were and at times have reported them if necessary.

[Roxylox in reply to bethelbee]

I wish I had your courage

[bethelbee in reply to Roxylox]

Years ago I didn't, but the older I've gotten the more outspoken I've become. Am in my 60's) We must advocate for ourselves. If you don't feel comfortable telling the provider themselves, tell the office manager. Hope you get to see your regular doctor soon!!

[Roxylox in reply to bethelbee]

Thank you. I would be a bit wary of the office manager. I have a good relationship with her but she is alzo quite strict. I wouldn't want to rock the boat

[bethelbee in reply to Roxylox]

I understand where you are coming from but if it's my health that's involved I don't worry about 'rocking the boat'. You deserve to be treated better.

[Roxylox in reply to bethelbee]

I agree of course, but l can't change my deferential attitude. I am in my 50s. I'm unlikely to change much now. Thanks a million for your concern

[bethelbee in reply to Roxylox]

Never too old to change. As I said I'm in my 60's. Wishing you well!!

[Starrlight]

Wish it were different. I wonder what you would feel good about doing to prepare in case you see him next time. Maybe keep in mind that it’s him, not anything against you, but I do know what you are saying. It’s uncomfortable.

[Roxylox in reply to Starrlight]

I felt l opened up to him considerably and got nothing in return. I honestly feel l would tell him less next time!

[Starrlight in reply to Roxylox]

Yeah I would feel that way too. (((((((Hug))))))) hopefully you’ll get to see your regular doc.

[Roxylox in reply to Starrlight]

Thanks Starr

[Starrlight in reply to Roxylox]

♥️

[Nothing_but_books]

Hey Roxylox. The doc you saw sounds awful. I'm sorry you went through that. I absolutely agree with Starrlight, the way he acted is all about him, not about you.

Many years ago, I saw an awful psychiatrist. My therapist said a lot of clients had complained about her -- it was very validating -- and recommended I stop seeing her pronto. The office put me through it; I wasn't allowed to switch without explaining to her what I didn't like. Boy I hated that. But I survived doing it, and I'm proud of myself.

Maybe you can try leaving a message for your regular doctor and say what happened and how you feel. Sometimes it's easier to face people on the phone.

I hope it works out soon.

[Roxylox in reply to Nothing_but_books]

Thanks Nothing_ but_pain

[Nothing_but_books in reply to Roxylox]

You're welcome. 🙏

[Hidden]

Uggh. See someone else!!! I recently had to see a really lousy psychiatrist too. After the allotted time of 15 minutes she was shooing me out of her door. I feel for you.

[Roxylox in reply to Hidden]

Thanks , but l don't really get a choice in who l see, and l'm quite timid when all boils down. I can only hope it won't be him again.

[Hidden in reply to Roxylox]

Maybe it would help if someone like your husband or a relative or friend could help you make some phone calls and try to advocate for you so you don’t have to do it all yourself. It can be very intimidating I know. I’ve been through a lot myself. I’m praying for you and know that I’m thinking about you. You’re one of my favorite people on here!!!🙂

[Roxylox in reply to Hidden]

Aw thanks. That is good to hear. It's nice you are back on . I missed you. I hope you are doing better now

[SayNOtoPanic]

Ughhhhh. He needs a new profession. That sucks. Sorry this happened to you. You should call and let the office know you don’t want to see him again and what other options until your regular returns. Big hugs.

[Roxylox in reply to SayNOtoPanic]

It is a small office with limited options, so l can only hope l will get the nicr girl next time

[MaggieSylvie]

I'm sorry you came out feeling so low. I'm wondering whether psychiatrists are trained not to be empathetic. After all, a therapist is more the one who should display empathy, whereas a psychologist is perhaps more of a scientist . While it would have been good if he could have prepared by reading your notes beforehand, he probably wasn't given your file due to time/distance restraints, but he could have kept you waiting while having a quick read.

Having said all that, why would someone go into that profession if they couldn't connect with patients - other human beings. You might as well have been talking to a robot. If you tell him how he made you feel, he would probably say, well, it's not my job to make you feel happy; that's your job. You - nobody else is responsible for the way you feel. (Look what you made me do!). But hell - It's not his job to knock you down, is it?

I had something similar in my teens. I yelled at my psychiatrist. "You sit there asking questions all the time; You're not helping me at all!" I'm sure I said more, but anyway, I walked out, probably slamming the door behind me. In hindsight, I would like to have allowed her the chance to explain what she was doing, because I think we might have uncovered some interesting things.

Let's hope you get your usual doctor next time, and in the meantime, find some activity/"feel good" film to cheer you up. Talk to a really good friend or relative.

[Roxylox in reply to MaggieSylvie]

It must have been great satisfaction to yell at her all the same! All l coukd do was vent to my family and on here.Thanks for your reply

[Ryanlion]

Dont take this episode with your psychiatrist personally. I have had a few like him in my time. In my opinion it is rare to find a psychiatrist with empathy because they come from the head and not the heart. To them you are like a problem to be solved. They will listen to you for facts etc.. Then they can prescribe medication & treatment for you. Its mechanical for them, never expect caring or understanding or feelings from them. They see their primary role to perscribe pills and thats it. Its not you, its him, the sad cold hearted lizard. Your therapist is the one with empathy. Dont let him spoil your day, remember your special and hes just a dr doing a job badly in my opinion.

[Roxylox in reply to Ryanlion]

I just love ' sad cold hearted lizard'. Describes him perfectly. As l told Boston001, l was lucky enough to meet three with empathy in the past. I suppose l was just lucky.

[Boston001]

I am a little cynical on this subject and my opinion is just that, my point of view and not based on facts. People go to college for years to study a field that interests them, maybe they think they can help others with their problems, but after college when they are "Working" in that field it becomes a job like any other job, people in people out, analyze the systems, draw from experience and formulate a treatment. If they get emotionally vested in each person who walks in the door they will start losing perspective by taking on other people's problems. Put yourself in his seat just met you, he may know the notes from the other psychiatrist but now he needs to talk to you and make an assessment for himself. Over the past 15 years, I have met a lot of these cold fish. In my experience, my psychiatrist treats every problem with medication, whereas my therapist uses his words to help me work on my feelings. Well anyhow, I hope you get the other guy back so you can feel more comfortable.

[SayNOtoPanic in reply to Boston001]

”cold fish” love that!!! Damn shame unfortunately but it’s a perfect analysis.

[Roxylox in reply to Boston001]

Thank you. Psychiatrists do generally work witb medication, but l was lucky enough in the past to get two, actually three at various times who chatted and showed compassion. This fellow was a shock to me as a result.

[Toddzen]

Psychiatrists have become mainly drug pushers. And more research is coming out that these psychiatric drugs don't work. Psychiatrists rely on their drugs rather than engage with patients on a human level. A quick talk, a prescription and your out the door. My current Psychiatrist is ignoring my requests for an appointment. She has totally ghosted me. I think she had a mental breakdown. Her behavior is awful. I'm disgusted.

[Weatherwoman]

No excuse for a cold, & no empathy. But, while it's sad, it speaks Far more about the Psy. & certainly Not you. And, always remember He/she is working for you. You, or your insurance are pay the Psy. salary! They are serving You, and not the other way around. Sorry, for your experience. I had a uncaring Psy. & Fired Him! There are a lot of good one's out there. Good luck to you.

[Roxylox in reply to Weatherwoman]

Thanks Weatherwoman

[Weatherwoman in reply to Roxylox]

Welcome!

[emmi331]

Maybe this is why what worked better for me was doing talk therapy with a qualified counselor (they do not prescribe) rather than a psychiatrist.

Psychiatrists can be a bit too...shall we say, clinical?

[Roxylox in reply to emmi331]

Yes, l am booked in for talk therapy.