My son: I'm new here. I have a 19 year... - Anxiety and Depre...

Anxiety and Depression Support

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My son

Mmabear profile image
15 Replies

I'm new here. I have a 19 year old that has been coping with depression, anxiety, OCD for 3 years now. He went from athletic and very social to deep depression. He had a great therapist for a few years but our insurance decided they no longer would cover the expense. My son is still struggling. He has a part time job but when he's not working, he sleeps. We tried the road of medication but that was awful! He doesn't go out, it's rare he meets with his friends. He stays in contact but very rarely goes out. Anyone familiar or have similar exsperience? Would love to chat.

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Mmabear profile image
Mmabear
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15 Replies
optimismrus profile image
optimismrus

Can relate because I spent painful years finding help for my daughter. The only advise I can share is to look for a program that involves you and your son. I ran from group to group with my daughter several times a week for almost a year. Eventually she was entered into a year's program called Phoenix House. I also attended "tough love" groups for parents of troubled children. I don't know what your financial situation is but I was a single mother living month to month. There are programs out there, and you may have to dig for them like I did. If you are financially able there are private schools and/or programs like Vision Quest that will take a problem adolescent and challenge them to overcome their fears and learn to take care of themselves. I hope that you are able to share with a therapist/counselor/minister your fears for your son. Have courage one day at a time. I know that I saved my daughter's life. She is now 42 with a family of her own. She thanks me and I hope your son will thank you, too.

Mmabear profile image
Mmabear in reply to optimismrus

Thank you so much for sharing. This really helps to give me a compass, if that makes sense. I'm so happy everything turned out ok. ♥

SayNOtoPanic profile image
SayNOtoPanic

Hang in there! Not sure where you reside but in a lot of states, maybe even all of them, have programs in the local community colleges and also at the university where u can get great therapists on sliding scales through the counseling and psychology programs where people are finishing up masters degrees. Look into it in ur area. Also support groups for anxiety and depression a lot of the in person ones tend to really be welcoming to the young adults. Healing prayers for your boy. 🙏🏻

Mmabear profile image
Mmabear in reply to SayNOtoPanic

Thank you, you're very kind. I appreciate all the information I can get.

designguy profile image
designguy

Along with the good information from other members here, you might check out your local NAMI Chapter in your area, they often have resources and information and even support groups available for free or very low cost. Also check out your local County Mental Health services for free or affordable mental health services and help.

Mmabear profile image
Mmabear in reply to designguy

Thank you so much.

grab0001 profile image
grab0001

Its great to see a parent concerned for their childs mental health rather then telling them to get over it ike a lot of parents do. So I commend you for being a first step in your childs recovery as well as a safe space! I don't have a child with mental illness but do suffer from it myself and often just havig a person there truly helps. That person doesn't even need to do anything, just knowing they are there truly begins the steps of getting better. As others have said there are resources around to help people with mental illness in your situation, keep fighting for your child and there needs!I know this comment didnt offer much advice, just wanted to let you know that you are doing a good job!

Mmabear profile image
Mmabear

Please know your comment gives me a great deal of comfort! I appreciate you saying that. Many days I have wondered if I'm doing enough. The love I have for my son's is greater than anything in this world. It runs so deep. I tell him I would go to the ends of the earth for him. There's nothing I wouldn't do. And just so you know, your doing a good job too. Sometimes when we go outside ourselves to make another feel good, it heals a part of you. It moves you forward. We're all in this together 😊

SayNOtoPanic profile image
SayNOtoPanic in reply to Mmabear

Bless your heart May you always be there for him and him for you. 🙏🏻wonderful mama.

Mmabear profile image
Mmabear in reply to SayNOtoPanic

Thank you ♥

TimDoggyDog profile image
TimDoggyDog

I can relate. I stay at home along & have no friends. Very depressed & social anxiety. People scare me I trust no one. So i just don't out unless i need food. I get social security disability insurance (ssdi) for mental health reasons. The luster of life doesn't exist, no joy, no pleasure. Nothing is fun everyday sucks. But I see a psychiatrist every month that's probably the only good thing I do.

SayNOtoPanic profile image
SayNOtoPanic in reply to TimDoggyDog

You got this Tim! Don’t let it define you. Try to do meditation or read books on it to empower yourself. Check out Dr Claire Weeks work she has a few books Hope and Help for your nerves is one of them. And you know what you don’t have to trust people. Start off small maybe a goal of saying hello how is ur day going once a week when picking up food or when at the grocery run etc. to start wiring positive experiences in ur mind and get that empowerment. Good vibes to you.

Mmabear profile image
Mmabear in reply to TimDoggyDog

Baby steps.. as my son's therapist would say. And be kind to yourself. Your not alone just remember that. SayNOtoPanic gave really good advice. It looks to me like you do have friends 😊

Zhangliqun profile image
Zhangliqun

A difficult/uncomfortable question to ask, but does he have some iffy friends and/or showing signs of drug use?

Mmabear profile image
Mmabear in reply to Zhangliqun

Fortunately he has a small but amazing group of friends. I can answer that honestly. My son has been very open with me. It wasn't always like that. When this first started happening with him, it was very difficult to get him to talk. I was really scared he might be doing drugs but no signs at all though. Thankfully it didn't turn to that. I truly count my blessings in that aspect. I think because of my past and sharing with him what I exsperienced scared him to even touch tobacco. I appreciate your question.

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