depression, numbness, lack of motivation and anxiety

[Merlina1026]

Hi, I feel in a dark place right now. I can't really seem to focus or get excited by anything. I feel very anxious to go out of my house or even to start something. I haven't been able to do too much for almost a month.

I have joined pottery classes, yoga classes, and outdoor walks to get me to interact with other people but it gives me a lot of anxiety. When I'm in the event I feel ok but I also feel that I can't really connect, I feel detached.

I can't get out of my house to get a job, I'm only applying for remote online jobs. I have a job starting in April that involves a lot of interaction with people, and the thought of it makes me freeze.

I do not recognize myself, for the first time in my life, I do not feel interested in having a partner, and it's like I already gave up on the idea of a happy family.

For the past 5 months, I haven't been able to enjoy friends, family, or the things I used to enjoy, like learning languages, nights out, or a good conversation over lunch.

I will be 33 in May, and I only want to be by myself. I honestly feel like I've let the train of life pass right in front of my eyes. I feel like I didn't have the guts to do what I wanted. I feel like I know how to do a bunch of things at the basic level but I do not master anything.

I'm trying to get my life back on track but I can't help to feel that no matter what I do, I always end up at this uncertain and pathless point in life. Always starting from scratch. I feel exhausted.

I need help.

[AFdale]

So I have had similar feelings for the last month or so, been anxious, not feeling well physically because of that although the mind wonders if I have something else wrong etc, haven't wanted to do much but stay home and work out which help briefly. It was really bad a couple of weeks ago but I am slowly feeling like I am getting back to normal , what has helped me is talking to a professioinal about it, I talked to three before I found one that was helpful and really just getting it all out there and talking has helped, also reading a couple of books about the subject and there are tons of videos on YouTube that have been helpful. Most days I still get anxious through out the day but it's getting better.

[KCLombo]

Hey, sounds like you should see a psychiatrist and get on some medication. When your brain chemistry is off it is hard to get yourself to do anything. Are you taking any meds?

[Artistfriend]

33 is young, ill be 53 in May. Life has never passed you by its here now. Start small, get help, deal as best you can with your issues, learn about yourself. Im not religious but Jesus didnt start preaching until he was 33, life dosent have a schedule. I didnt start really enjoying life until the past 15 years or so and thats even with anxiety