I am not getting "my way" with my mother's care. I do not like my mother's care team: Caregivers, RN, and how her medical decisions are made. I don't see the best for my mother.
I am the youngest of the daughters, 33 yeards old. My mother is 74 years old. I feel side lined as a caregiver to her, and I do not have much input in my mother's health despite living with her. I have ordered her rehab equipment (i.e. Sara Steady a month ago) and earlier in the year bought with my mother's own money as well a Hoyer Lift in September to support my mother to get back to her life. Both of which she doesn't use because she hasn't met her physical therapy goals to get out of bed. This has personally upset me, and left me lost about how to go about encouraging her to get out of bed. I try to not show any emotion about it because I don't want her to get discouraged, disappointed and fall back into being "cozy" in her hospital bed longer. I want her out of her bed, walking. I want to enjoy my mother and her life.
How do I make life better and the best for my mother? I find that elder care does not have a lot of enhancing quality of life activities for those receiving care at a private home. I have looked online for most things for her to have at home so she is comfortable: table over bed, clothing rack, pillows (of all kinds), Hepa Filter (clean air), etc. But, right now she just watches TV. I have seen her quality of life drop to just watching tv all day. She asked 5 weeks ago to go outside and we have not done that yet. And, it bothers me. It hurts and it is a personal failure on my behalf to see her succeeed and be happy while she is bedbound. She is unable to use a wheelchair, and hoyer lift to get outside because she is not physically strong enough to get to sitting to the edge of the bed, which is a requirement by her physical therapist to do that before other moves such as getting into a wheelchair. The hoyer lift she is worried to use.
I need ideas of Quality of Life enhancing ideas: For example, entertainment, social support, daily fun, etc, for those bedridden, it takes away everything. I suffer caring for her and there isn't a lot offered by the public to alleviate these topics so that I can provide to my mother to enhance her life at home while she is bedridden.
My mother does not like skilled nursing facilities. However, with the doctor's not diagnosing her as hospice, I do not know what to expect for my mother's care and future. Every day is unknown.
Any advice, tips, recommendations, etc for me to add anything to enhance quality of life, and success for life.
I have suffered with depression from pitfalls, failures, trespasses seeing my mother suffer in pain. She has been suffering for 6 solid months. I have been suffering as well.
painful depression
Helping with depression
Once a Mother's child
Anxious daughter
