Why does my family hate me?

[Hopeless912]

I’m not sure where to begin. I come from a great family! I’m almost forty and so is my girlfriend of almost ten years. Neither one of us have children. My brother who is 7 years older than me has been through all sorts of women and has many kids and an extra wife that is causing all sorts of havoc in my family. Due to medical issues I am dealing with and my girlfriend also, my family is treating the relationship like shit. She had to move half way across the country so she could get medical help, and I’m stuck here half blind. My family does everything for my heroin addict brother but nothing for me. I’m ready to put a bullet in my head, I actually was holding the pistol earlier talking myself out of it.

[Sillysausage234]

talk to a professional if possible ,you’re in deep depression ,everything at this point seems against you ….maybe get the gun out of the house awhile …hope you get some more replies soon

[Mea2021]

Hey, I hope you have calmed down and are feeling better now. I don't know enough to explain why you believe your family hates you. They may focus on your brother because he is so needy with his issues. They may feel they don't have to worry as much about you. As for the relationship, set boundaries or don't come around them. There is no use in subjecting you and your girlfriend to negativity, you two are already dealing with enough. Try not to worry about how your family feels about you and think of yourself. Love yourself and concentrate on you. Be your own best friend and know you are worth being here enjoying you and what you love. I hope this makes since. I also struggle with my family's lack of attention for me and my existence. But for me I try not to think about them and focus on loving me and doing the things that make me happy. It's not easy I have to work very hard at this. I just hope this makes since and is helpful for you. Take care of yourself and love you. Your're the most important person and you deserve to be loved even by you.

[012703060610]

Mea just said it best....you need to do what is best for you! I too am in a family where the sole focus is on my drug addicted sister. My parent's relocated to raise her kids, did all their meals. Heck I had to tote my little three kids all over to the country to meet her and my parents needs. I am done with that sister and am trying to see where I can land with my parents. I feel awful though. My mom is in end stage Parkinson's. They don't think my medical issues are bad or life threatening. The shame I still get for not going from the West coast to the East coast is non stop. I need full care in a wheelchair to travel. Long story short....I am very much in your spot. It hurts and it hurts a lot. Sillysausage makes a good point on therapy. I finally found one that I trust and is helping me with boundaries and helping me let go of the guilt. It has taken four decades to realize that I cannot expect people to treat me like I treat them. In the end, my parents now realize they spent all their energy on one kid and they will never know my kids (their other grandchildren). So they are sad too...but not sad enough to care for me. Hang in there. YOU are number 1!