I’m so scared

[Isturgglewithptsd]

So my mom has just told me that I have to give a speech about mental health infront her whole company. She is a CEO with about 10000 employees at her company. HELP ME

[Hidden]

So why do you have to??? If you’re not comfortable, don’t do it.

[Isinatra]

That’s a lot to ask of Anybody. Crikey. Tell her no. If you have to, ask your therapist or doctor, if you have one, to back you up on that. I’m assuming that you don’t want to or can’t do what your mom wants you to do?

[Genuineguy]

This sounds so much to deal with and it seems inappropriate to tell someone they HAVE to speak about mental health. Its no wonder you're struggling right now. This isnt something you should have to do.

[Thankfulforhelp22]

This seems very unfair to you. Is your mom aware of your issues with this?

Can you respectfully decline?

[hypercat54]

Arrrgh. You don't have to do anything you don't want too so I would just tell her no way. She can't force you.

[Raggedy-Ann]

deep breath... repeat. Does any part of you want to talk about it. Forget the size of the crowd because they are not important. What do you think your mom's motive is by asking you? Ask her. She is opening up your experience to a bunch of people who will struggle to understand but at the same time your story might help other people. If you don't want to do it, do not do it. Talk to your mom, ask all of your questions. Why you? What are her expectations of you if you decide to say yes. You need a lot more information. She might not have even thought about how you might feel about it. Public speaking is not easy for anyone in general. If you make an informed decision then you can feel good either way. If you decide to do it, I have done a lot of that and can help you out.

[Nothingnoted]

Hi Isturggle, Just tell your mom no. You shouldnt have to be forced to do that. This is not good for your wellbeing. Do you have a car and can you take off for a say and drive somewhere

[Against_the_current]

I'mAPersonWithSocialAnxietyAndHadPresentationsAboutMentalHealthAndFeltGreatItSNormalToBeScaredJustThinkAboutHowPassionateYouAreAboutWhatYoureTalkingAboutImaginePeopleLikeYouLookAt3PeopleAroundTheRoomWhoLookAtYouPositevelyAndSlowlyChangeYourDirectionOfLookingTowardsThemDontWorryThePublicIsntsPayingThisMuchAttentionYouveGotThis

[AndrewT]

Dear Isturgglewithptsd,

Ok a Big Speech, a bit 'Daunting'....... To say the least BUT....... let's Break This Down.

It's In Front Of your Mother and HER Company, Her Chosen People- if you like. Were you ever Four? Of Course you were, everybody has been.... and that Nativity Play, in Front of- Your Mother and Her Friends. You were petrified, couldn't stop needing the Toilet (Bathroom)..... maybe 'did some', while you waited- which was the Worst Bit, wasn't it.... The Waiting. Once you were actually 'On' The Stage, you did Great, everyone Cheered & Clapped.

So now you have a Bigger 'Stage', in Front of your Mother and her Friends, your Petrified- can't stop needing the Toilet (Bathroom)....... hang on, haven't you Been 'Here' before? Can I gently suggest that YOU WILL BE FINE, my friend.

Just make sure, Very Sure Actually, that your Mother has you 'Fully Briefed', against any- and all Hecklers (Nothing Worse, when you are a bit 'nervous' already!).

What can Go Wrong? Well, in my experience, which is Not Huge but 'reasonable'. If you are asked, a question, that you really Don't Know..... then Refer it "I'm not too sure myself but, I believe, 'Brian, Tom, Claire, Mr Jones, Mrs Patel' might Know, can I Bring Him/ Her In Please?" When the question has been answered, 'Come Back' with- something like- "Thank you 'Maddy', that was very helpful". Once He/ She is Off the Stage, continue with "Any more questions" or "As I was Saying" or even "Well I think that has Covered 'Everything'.'

Do be Prepared for the Large Gentleman, on the Second to last row, Shouting out "I have One More Point" or "I Still Have A Question" or even "Are You Deaf, I Was Asking You......". NEVER be Intimidated, by these People, even if they Shout, at you. (aren't there always Nettles, even in the best 'kept' of gardens?) Finish with "Well Thank You Ladies And Gentlemen, you have been a lovely audience (even if the haven't been!).

You Have 'Got' This, your Mother WILL be proud.

Sending ALL our Very Best Wishes

AndrewT

[Dee-Dee00]

ummm… that’s not cool. Your mother should know better if she truly knows your dx. If you’re not being honest well then she’s off the hook.

[MaggieSylvie]

I can see you have a mental health problem, but does that make you an expert? Are you, in fact, somewhat of an expert? Is the talk about mental health/PTSD in the workplace? How long does your mother want you to talk for? Have you ever done it before? Sorry for all these questions, but my first reaction was "WHAT!!! That is a dreadful imposition to spring on anyone and I would feel disgust that a person so close to you could be so tactless". You don't actually say what the problem is. Is it talking to so many people? Is it that you have never done this before? Is it that the talk would involve talking about too many personal issues? Why would the subject be of interest to your mother's company? Would it help the personnel with issues they have in the company? Is your knowledge base wide enough for such a wide subject?

What do you think is your mother's motive - would you, maybe, gain anything from doing this? For instance, you might gain more confidence, more experience in talking to large groups, you might reach a personal goal of understanding more about the subject yourself, as you'd probably want to do a bit of research before going out there. Could you talk to one person at length about the subject? If so, talking to many is not so different - just lots of ones. Questions can be really helpful in this situation, but how do you feel about answering questions from the crowd? If you don't do it, how will you feel? I remember being asked to give a short speech at a moment's notice about qualifying as a life coach, and all my being shouted NO, and I refused, but at the last moment, I thought I'm not giving myself credit for what I have been working towards. If I can't do this, what does it say about me as a coach - that I can't step outside my comfort zone? I did it and it was great and I felt great afterwards. The sky didn't fall in. Do think carefully before saying No, but if that's what you need to say, you have every right to refuse. Either way, you will have a bull of some sort to take by the horns. Good luck. 😊

[Lve2dance]

Look over their heads.. Pick spot and look there.. Imagine you are having a conversation with people who you already know

[Zhangliqun]

On the other hand, ponder this:

Part of overcoming or at lease effectively coping with mental illness is doing something that pulls you out of yourself and focuses you on others. Mental illness and the goading of it by demons has a tendency to get you all alone in a corner thinking only about yourself and your bad feelings which is a recipe for deterioration and much worse. Shifting your focus elsewhere in a positive way is great counter to that. If you think of it that way, it might not only not hurt you but actually help you a great deal.

Also, what's the worst that could happen if everything goes wrong? You'll get a smattering of polite applause.

I assume the idea is to give the employees some insight of what mental illness is like from the inside. Also, someone in the audience might have his life saved by what you say.

The trick is writing a coherent, on-point speech. Exactly what aspect of mental illness does your mom want you to focus on?

[Lazy_dog_lover]

I don't think this is ok for her to say you HAVE to give a speech. What do you want to do? If you want to give the speech, we can help you. Is this live or can you make it on Zoom? What do you want to focus on? Mental health is a gigantic topic. Smaller topics: Sleep, work-life balance, nutrition, seeking help, resources...

[Stippler]

I agree that you shouldn't HAVE to do this. If she asked you in a respectful manner, then you could decide what you want to do, but if she requires it of you, that does not seem very fair to ask of you. It is your decision, and your mother should respect your choice.

[Moonira]

It doesn't matter whether your Mom is CEO of 10000 ...do. you feel like giving the speech, are you able to? Your name suggests that you suffer from PTSD. I am the proud mother of 2 extraordinary children and would NEVER expect them to do anything against their will. Good luck. Respect yourself and your limits. 💫👏💫🦋🌈