So sad to admit this but hoping I'm not alone

[CaaP123]

I'm realizing that what makes me so depressed has a lot to do with the fact that I really, really dislike being a parent. I know this is true to a certain extent for many, but I think it's more extreme for me. I have young elementary aged children and obviously I love them, but I rarely enjoy being with them. They feel like a burden all the time and I feel like all of my life outside of work is about catering to their wants and needs. I feel trapped in my own house with them and I feel like all my time with them is spent just tolerating them as much as I can and waiting for the inevitable when they will fight or do something where I will have to intervene and feel angry/resentful/defeated, etc. I don't feel like my life is mine - it belongs to my kids. I feel like I'm all alone in feeling this miserable about parenting. Can anyone relate?

[AsterixSocialanxiety]

Hi CaaP123 ! I am not a parent so i don’t completely understand what you are saying. However I just want to let you know that its okay. When i think of having kids in the future this feeling is exactly what i am worried about. It feels good to know this is a real feeling. I am sure there are many many other parents who feel exactly this way. I hope your partner is sharing the burden with you. If not if you can get babysitters or care takers for a few hours please do so and give yourself a break.

[Lookingforhope20100]

I can relate so well i have a toddler and i obviously love her to death but at the same time i feel like she ruined my life and i just hate being a parent granted i had my child at a young age with no support but i get it and i feel in my opinion its okay to feel this way as long as you dint stop loving them

[BubbleGumPop]

I feel that way most when depression/anxiety increase and then feel overwhelmed with my child, my responsibilities,and myself.

[CaaP123 in reply to BubbleGumPop]

This makes sense... unfortunately my depression and anxiety have been flaring up a lot for a few weeks now, and its usually only at a manageable but uncomfortable level to begin with.

[hypercat54]

You are far from alone. This comes from not attending to your own needs. You need to have some time to yourself to go out or even for a walk on your own to recharge your batteries.

Do you have a partner who can take over for a while? Or others who could babysit while you can get some peace? That is the answer.

[silentdreamer20]

It is so important for us, as parents, to remember that we are still people. We have to remember that we need time for ourselves. Having someone (we trust) who can babysit on designated days is valuable. Times for you to have you time. Get your nails done, your hair done, go out with your girls, dinner & a movie with your spouse. Or even go and just have some quiet time alone. This is so important for our sanity, as well as our relationships.