Recently diagnosed with anxiety, looking for some guidance and understanding

[Smink]

Hello everyone.

I am new here. I have been struggling with anxiety lately and I wanted to share my experience here and speak with anyone who is interested in talking to me about it. I’d like to hear from anyone, whether you are having a similar experience as me or whether you’re just open to sharing your thoughts.

I was diagnosed with anxiety a couple of weeks ago when I had a mental breakdown in a hospital. I experienced a major panic attack. I recently moved to the US on my own from Ireland and I think the stress of moving, as well as stress at work, smoking weed, and loneliness all contributed to my anxiety. I did not know I ever had anxiety. I was very healthy back in Ireland, but I think moving here exacerbated the condition.

The main thing I would like to know is whether anxiety is a condition that only certain people have? As in, is it normal to experience this simply from moving out of home and being stressed a lot? I might just be quite an anxious person in general, I don’t know.

I do not take medication, nor do I intend to. I am dealing with it naturally, i.e. with exercise, counseling, sleeping and eating habits, etc.

I still experience mild symptoms now and again, and it is definitely an issue that now affects my day-to-day life. I think I am still trying to accept that I am suffering from a mental illness. I hope that by continuing to stay healthy and by getting some better understanding, I will be ‘cured’ of it eventually so to speak. Or at least I hope that the physical symptoms will become something that doesn’t affect my daily life.

One thing I am trying to do right now is just take things slower. I usually rush things and try to do too much all at once, but I am being more forgiving of myself now and I am trying to give myself the time to do things so I don’t put pressure on myself so much. Also, I am trying to be disciplined as well! I am making sure not to make the same mistakes that lead me to worsen my anxiety in the first place, for example neglecting healthy sleeping habits.

Please let me know your thoughts! Thanks.

By the way, I have laid out my full experience in much more detail on my profile page. Please feel free to read it if you want the full picture.

[Dolphin14]

Welcome to the group, That's a major move! I can see why you feel anxious. Do you have support here or are you completely solo? Adjusting is going to take time.

You have very good coping skills in place. Exercise is a great source of relief for me.

I think you hit the nail on the head when you said you are hoping to feel better once you get a better understanding of your anxiety. For me that was very important. I thought it was coming out of nowhere but it had roots.

Taking good care of yourself, decreasing the stress you have control over and being gentle and patient with yourself are important.

You will find a lot of support here.

Welcome to 🇺🇸 and best of luck to you

🐬

[Smink in reply to Dolphin14]

Hi, thank you very much. You’re right in saying to focus on the stress you have control over, and I’m sure that goes hand in hand with better understanding. I am starting counseling soon and hope to make some progress in that regard. Also being gentle and patient with yourself is very true.

[Smink in reply to Smink]

And sorry, yes, I am completely alone. My friends cousin lives in the city who I have met once or twice but that’s it.

[Dolphin14 in reply to Smink]

I'm impressed with your courage to move countries alone. I hope it won't be too long before you establish some friendships.

🐬

[Dolphin14 in reply to Smink]

I hope the counseling helps you move forward. I've had great luck with counseling and I wish you the same

🐬

[Smink in reply to Dolphin14]

Thank you very much. I hope so too.

[Agora1]

Hi Smink, I appreciate your detailed profile. It certainly helps in knowing the backgroundof where this all came from. I agree with you in that the move was a huge change for you emotionally. Anxiety does not like changes and I think once you were in the U.S. it hit you

hard and Bam, your mind and body responded to it.

It is not unusual to feel like it was your heart. I'm glad you got it checked out. But even knowing now that it's anxiety doesn't really make it any easier does it?? I went through the same symptoms and worries as you at one time. I did go on Xanax which helped but then

there were eventually break throughs after being on it for so long. I had therapy along with

the medication but even that was not the full answer in getting back control of my life.

It's funny that I never considered myself as having a mental illness. I don't think I ever used those words. I just kept telling myself that I was just so scared of everything. I did always believe that I would beat anxiety and never gave up.

I became Agoraphobic for 5 years, never leaving my house because of my fears and of course

Panic Attacks and daily free floating Anxiety.

I used that time to work on myself and try different methods to help me.

Knowing everything you can about Anxiety can help you understand and accept what's happening. A book or video that you can review on YouTube is "Hope & Help for Your Nerves" by Dr. Claire Weekes. She was a psychiatrist who herself had Anxiety and found a theory that helped not only her but her patients. That theory is Acceptance. Letting the fear go through it's phase will help shorten the symptoms rather than fighting them which only leaves you in the fight or flight state.

Smink, you are in the right place in learning how others have gotten through these terrifying

symptoms and have gotten control back of their life. Rather than just existing they are now living their dream again.

I am one of those people who got back control of my life and it is an amazing feeling my friend. You too, with our help and support can get there as well. One step at a time, small steps count. Keep doing what you are doing. Stay Positive, you will get there. xx

[Smink in reply to Agora1]

Thank you so much for this response. I’m sorry to hear about your struggles but I’m so glad that you overcame them. I hope you keep well.

As for me, I am focusing on taking care of myself day by day, step by step as you say. I have made good progress so far such as maintaining exercise and getting back to work. At this point, though, there are a few things that I need to change which are not helping my anxiety, ie. moving out to a less stressful living situation and improving my financial situation.

I am feeling very stuck, as I am finding it difficult to find a new place to live and to find a better paid job, and my anxiety will only improve so much until I can change these things. It is a huge test of patience. I’m hoping I can change these things soon.

[Agora1 in reply to Smink]

Give yourself the time you need to adjust. Know that we learn from our experiences bad or good. I wouldn't be where I am today had I not gone through my own tough times.Stronger for sure.

I wish you well. You are no longer alone. All in time, things will fall into place. xx

[Smink in reply to Agora1]

Thank you for the reassurance. I really appreciate your support.

[Magpie82]

Hi Smink. I totally identified with your post and wanted to tell you that you are not alone and my own anxiety and depression I am currently going through surfaced from simply moving home! For background I am a 40 year old bloke with 21 years in the military, been in all kinds of places and situations and regard my previous mental health as good over all (although my CBT sessions have made me realise I have previously catasrophised a lot in my way of thinking!) But like you, my anxiety was triggered by a (house) move, maybe the increased financial pressure and responsibility was at the root of my mental shift, I'm yet to figure this out. But it surfaced with a major panic attack and I have been on the rollercoaster since. You have a great mindset to manage it and hope you have a good support network as that helps me. If not, this forum has some great people to virtually surround yourself with. As Agora1 said, one step at a time, don't rush this. Advice I've heeded myself!

[Smink in reply to Magpie82]

Hi Magpie82, thank you very much for your kind words. I hope you’re doing well. Hearing about your experience has been very helpful. I am certain that financial pressure and my living conditions are a huge source of my anxiety and I am trying to change this as best I can right now. The only plus side I can see is that tolerating these stressors until they’re gone gives me a chance to build resilience and patience. I’m hoping for some good changes in the near future 🙏

I do not have much of a support network at all. I know one person who lives in the city through a friend, but that’s it. All my family and friends are at home. I speak to them occasionally on the phone but other than that I have very little social interaction. I speak to people at work, and I have a pool group who I see occasionally (but they’re all a little older than me) but I feel like I need more regular social interaction with like minded people. I’d like to be able to do fun things and go to restaurants, explore places etc but I am just working and going to the gym as I cannot afford to do anything else. My rent is quite high and I am not making a very good wage so I need to limit my spending a lot. It’s not the kind of situation I imagined myself to be in before I moved out here. I am more or less surviving at this point and not living. I’m sure it will take some time but I have to be very careful that it does not take a gradual toll on my mental health. I need to take up a new sport soon and meet people and I need to move out of my current apartment as I don’t like the living situation. I barely know my roommates, we don’t have a lot in common so we don’t see each other much. There are a few other stressful things like only having one bathroom.

I know what I need to change, but I am just finding it extremely difficult to do so. I feel restricted and trapped (also, I don’t have a credit score so I don’t even know if I can move out). My limited support network does not help but I am extremely grateful for your support here and for having this forum. Thank you 🙏🙏

[Magpie82 in reply to Smink]

Hi Smink. Well the great thing is that you seem very self aware in the causes of your anxiety, what you can do to address them and that it will take time (a key thing to understand, that took me a while to realise). The only thing I can offer for now is to not be too hard on yourself to "live up" to any expectation of how things would be since your move. I've done this myself in the past and it caused unnecessary stress, anxiety and worry that I was putting onto myself. No one else was causing this pressure.

I hope you can make a few little changes to improve things in the short term.

[Smink in reply to Magpie82]

Thank you Magpie82, means a lot

[Hidden]

I knew someone who immigrated from Scotland to Canada, then permanently to the US (spouse was from here). It was an adjustment for her, too. That's quite a change for you, more than you might consciously realize. Have you looked around for nearby groups of others from Ireland, Irish interest groups, or gone to the embassy or consulate website to see what they might have to help with your getting acclimated?

[Smink in reply to Hidden]

Hi Pathfinding, thanks for the response. I have checked out some of the Irish groups but there doesn’t seem to be much going on for people my age other than a GAA club but I don’t have much of an interest in playing GAA. Most of the groups seem to be for business networking.I’m gonna look up some sports and hobbies that I could take up and hopefully will meet people through that.

[Agora1 in reply to Smink]

Great idea Smink....Park Districts offer some inexpensive classes. A good way to meet people xx

[Smink in reply to Agora1]

Thank you!