Fear of dying

[XOshannon81]

Does anyone have a fear of dying or the process of dying? For me it’s the process. I’m afraid that I’ll know when I’m dying, this fear is the main cause of my anxiety. Every time I get a slight pain or uncomfortable feeling the “am I dying “ thoughts just appear and it’s so overwhelming.

[Hidden]

I think a lot of us have this fear, XOshannon. It can be a cause of great anxiety for me, too. I try my best to accept this reality but it isn't always easy to do. Overwhelming is a good way to put it. I wish had the answer to comfort you and take away the fear, but I don't. I can tell you that when it happens to me I try to distract myself by thinking of how much life there is left for me and what I would like to accomplish in this time. Setting some goals and planning for my future are some of my distraction techniques.

You are young 25 year old with many years in front of you, this alone is a positive thought. I hope others will reply to your post with their coping strategies. ❤️

[XOshannon81 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you so much for your kind reassuring words. While reading your reply I just now realized that at some point I stopped setting goals and planning for a future.

[CL3V3R-G1RL]

I have this fear now. After my medication made my anxiety feel like it's on steroids I have pick up new fears. This is one of them. It more than likely for me comes from the fact I take care of my elderly mother. I watch her get old and struggle. She's not the same feisty woman she wants was. And she has suffered a few accidents in which I need to call an ambulance for. So that terrifies me cuz I'm more than likely going to find her when she passes on. It'll just be me and my fiancé. My fiancé works so I fear I'll die alone. I hate.

I know the saying "born alone, die alone". For the most part is true. I live with my mom and fiance. This was my grandparents house. Both grandparents have died in this house. I think my grandma got tired of dealing with being old and turned off her oxygen machine and let herself suffocate. My grandpa died a few years later of cancer. At least I got to say goodnight to him. He told my mom and sister he was going home and that his mother was calling him. So he went "home." My brother was out of a place & came to live with us after his messy divorce. He died on our couch. He died while listening to music. He had a heart attack in his sleep.

So death has been a constant presence in this house. Never bother me before until now. I hate that it gives me anxiety.

[XOshannon81 in reply to CL3V3R-G1RL]

Thank you for sharing. So much of my family have died recently, within a short space of each other and it frightens me. I hate that I’m so sensitive to every change in my body that if something feels off I go into panic mode. It’s exhausting really. Sometimes I feel like I’m playing a waiting game or I’m running from death.

[CL3V3R-G1RL in reply to XOshannon81]

Me too. Before this diagnosis of hypothyroidism. My life was going great. Even after the diagnosis. But once they up my medication it seemed it went to pot. Suddenly I need to take vitamin D, then I need iron supplements, then my first ever UTI and now I have this rash. I don't go walking like I use to because if I get my pulse racing it makes me feel uneasy. It's awful feeling like I'm going to die.

[Blue_81 in reply to CL3V3R-G1RL]

I understand. I seen many family passed away and I saw it as something that we all must go through one day. However, the anxiety i feel now makes me fear it that one day too I should pass.

[CL3V3R-G1RL in reply to Blue_81]

My therapist told me today if I don't feel sick then don't act like I am sick. I'm trying not to. This anxiety though isn't making it easy.

[Blue_81 in reply to CL3V3R-G1RL]

Totally understand. Its not that we want to be this way. If I could I will be different 💯 but its not that easy. Sometimes I do try really hard and it works for that day, only to come crashing the next day. Its like my mind is angry I want to change and puts me back in my place. I feel like a prisoner. I hope one day I will be free again.

[XOshannon81 in reply to CL3V3R-G1RL]

Sometimes with my anxiety I have to take a step back and ask myself "are you really feeling this way or are you making these feel up" but sometimes my anxiety clouds my judgment and I can't tell the difference.

[Blue_81]

For me the worst fear is the process. One day I will pass away but I hope that it will be quick. Seeing my health deteriorate little by little makes it worse. life is making a point that its getting closer 😣 and nothing that I do can stop it. This creates an everyday fear.

[fauxartist]

You might want to read Agora1's post on the fear of dying... it's very good. I think taking the fear out of something is difficult for someone suffering from an anxiety about it, but I do believe we can feel better with the more familiarity and work in therapy to cope with those fears.

[XOshannon81 in reply to fauxartist]

I'll look for it, thank you

[Qr83k_-Jd]

I can totally relate too you and it must be awful for you. I too am afraid of dying. I know I will die some day and I am terrified that I will know that I am dying, how do you say goodbye to others (if I'm don't die suddenly) and how does a person cope who is going to die. What if there is no heaven, no place to go ,and not see anyone I know. What if death is the end of life and there is nothing else. These are the sort of things that I worry about. I consider myself to be a Christian but sometimes I do doubt that Jesus was for real. So I do worry myself a lot. The only other person who knows is my friend because it is not a topic one discusses. It was a relief to read your post as you spoke of similar situations that I too feel. Well done you for talking about a topic which I fing extremely difficult to mention.

[Hidden in reply to Qr83k_-Jd]

What if there is a Heaven? What if there is a place to go? What if you see all of those who you know? What if eternal life awaits us. I don't mean for these questions to make your own questions seem insignificant, Qr83K_-Jd. What I try to do, and would like to pass on to you, hopefully to give you some comfort, is to have you ask yourself the "What If" questions that are positive.

Changing our thought process takes time and it can almost seem unattainable. What if you are able to attain this, though?

I fully agree with you, this topic can be extremely difficult. By discussing it we can hopefully find some comfort and relief.

[Qr83k_-Jd in reply to Hidden]

No I must admit I have never tried replacing my negative thoughts with positive ones. I must say that it is great info. I never even thought to try that approach. Thankyou for your king advice and for giving me something different to try. Otherwise the subject of death and dying can become all consuming and that is a place I hate to get caught up in.

[zombiemoose]

I'm terrified of dying. I totally understand this fear.

[Hidden in reply to zombiemoose]

💗

[Daveacr1959]

I think it’s a normal fear. But it’s part of life and no way around it. So when it comes let’s be brave. I don’t think the weather made all this amazing life. So I think there is a creator. A loving creator who loves us. But we don’t know for sure, we have to wait and see. So I pray and give thanks. I was swimming laps in chilly water yesterday. And got out and layed in the sun for 20 minutes to warm up. As I saw the bees and birds and hummingbird sitting on her nest. I said to myself, how lucky to be a part of this amazing, unexplainable life! I have watched hundreds and hundreds of near death experience videos. People usually die during surgery and come back. A few of them have said, when they were on the other side, they were offered the chance to be born and come here as babies. Only about half a dozen out of hundreds and hundreds said they were given a choice to come here before they were born. And when they temporarily died they were reminded of this. Back to the story, so I’m thinking, if I was given the chance, to come here or not. I would come here even with our bad stuff. Because I think as spirit beings we can’t experience what we do in the flesh. A kiss , a hug, making love. All our senses and sensations. A juicy piece of fruit exploding in your mouth. I said thanks god, there have been some hard times, but it’s worth the ride. And as I was laying in the sun, my pandora played “ went down swinging “ by Tom petty. Please listen to it. It’s about a 21 year old woman trying to make a life. And she is giving it her all, and she’s going out swinging. Vs sitting in her house scared. So get up to the plate and swing the bat every day!

[Hidden in reply to Daveacr1959]

This is a beautiful post Daveacr1959. I would choose to come back to my life that I am experiencing now.

[autumnmarie5]

Honestly I can somewhat understand what you are going through. I know sometimes I think dying might be more peaceful than the anxiety I deal with and the side effects that are physically unbearable. Sometimes I do feel like I'm dying and that it's painful and I wish it would just go away but others it seems more peaceful to not feel anything at all. Hopefully that fear goes away for a little bit and you are able enjoy at least some days out of the week. 😊

[Yuuupsongbook002]

Yes. Me. I do. It makes me feel discomfort, fear, or or frightened. I don't know what those thought could be coming from though. It could be coming from when I first started smoking or drinking...I think.

[designguy]

I think one thing to keep in mind about the fear of dying, especially for those of us who have anxiety issues is that physiologically the anxiety/panic response is hard wired into us to actually protect us from dying. So maybe it heightens our fear of dying when we're not actually dying and we are therefore more aware of it. With that can also come the heightened awareness of living.

[XOshannon81]

Thank you all so much for sharing your coping skills and experiences. It brings me a little bit of comfort to know that I'm not alone with these thoughts.