Lost

[Chae57]

Hi.....I havent been around here much.....I have recently been to the hospital with heart attack symptoms only to find out i was having an anxiety attack 🤦🏻‍♀️im only 37 and my life keeps on going like a rollercoaster ride. Ive been married for 12 years have 3 beautiful kiddies. I havent had an easy marriage but then again who does?! ive been deeply hurt many times and ive always given chance upon chance for the sake of love and family..but that has slowly dissappeared throughout the past 2 years. I have never felt this worthless and alone. My husband has said the most hurtful things which kinda stuck with me. I feel i have to fight the most for our marriage and honestly dont have the energy and drive to do so anymore. I also met someone whom i confided in and now it seems like this guy has fallen for me. I value my vows and i do not want to start an affair but i think i got too emotionally involved with this person who seems to get/understands what im going through. Right now im just very confused and im not sure what to feel. Apologies for the long msg. 🌻

[Nanii]

I'm sorry for what you're going through. It must be really difficult. I'm sorry, I'm not in the same position or something alike, so I can't give good advice. I don't think I will ever get married. I'm impossible to be wanted to spend your whole life with. I also think I can't myself. What is marriage? A survivingmechanism in society? A vow of eternal love? A stay together no mater what, even if it gets f***ed up? I personally believe in the 2nd, but the other's are worldwide more often than not big part of marriages I believe, if not consisting only of those other 3.

I think if your husband can be this harsh, it's really nice you were able to get understanding somewhere else. Do you know if the other person really likes you, or do you just have the idea? Maybe finding out for sure can help and if you want to work it out with your husband, being clear about that towards that person. If the other person does like you and you feel itchy about it, I'd advice to stand still, let go of everything, get to your truest feelings and see if it's just a case of "the-grass-on-the-other-side-is-always-greener" or not.

It seems at least, that getting some clarity about things will help you ease your anxiety a bit.