Hi guys *(slight trigger warning)*

Hello everyone! I am sorry for being inactive, I have just been busy with school and life in general. How is everyone doing?? I am doing okay. I don't know if anyone will get trigger about bipolar/personality disorders but if you are then I would stop reading at this point. **Yesterday was kind of a rough day for me. My psychiatrist told me yesterday that I am having a manic episode and that she is upping my dosage and also prescribing me medication to help me sleep. I don't have a problem going to sleep, I have a problem staying asleep. We also talked about me potentially having BPD and that I needed to make sure I talked to my therapist to see if I have it. She said that I also have to talk to my insurance about getting a dietitian. Also, I went to the doctors to get some lab work done for my psychiatrist and during that trip, I ended up having anxiety attack. I had to order an uber to get to the doctors office and I was there for maybe about five minutes. After the doctor was finished, she told me to have a good day. I didn't think that the appointment would be so quick so I went outside to try to order anothere uber to take me back to my dorm room. As I went to the uber app, I realized that I had no service. I walked around a bit to see if my service would come back but it didn't. I then decided to walk down the road because I thought that maybe it was the area that I was in that didn't have reception. Walking down the road, I realized that I still didn't have an service so I tried shutting my phone off and turning it back on to see if that would help. It didn't. At this point, I started to panic because I didn't know where I was and I couldn't get a ride. I was on the verge of tears, I could barely breathe, and I started to shake really bad. I don't know if I have told you guys this but I am really paraniod and I have a big fear of being kidnapped. (When I am in a uber, I stay on the phone with a friend and let them know where I am). I noticed this man in his truck just sitting there. He wasn't doing anything but my paranoia got the best of me and I thought he was plotting to get me. I walked to this wellness clinic still trying to get some service and I still couldn't get any service. My dorm was in walking distance but I was familiar with the area and didn't know where to go. I tried calling my roommate but she didn't answer and then I called my other best friend. When she answered, I told her what was happening and she stayed on the phone with me. All of a sudden, I got a little reception and I was able to get an uber! Day saved right? No. I got an uber and I was waiting on him to come pick me up. On the uber app, you can see where and how far your driver is from you. I guess he didn't know where he was going because he went everywhere except for where I was. I was outside waiting for about 40 minutes waiting on him to come and he didn't show up. Eventually, he went the opposite way and I assumed that he just gave up. I gave up and walked back to my room using the map from the uber app. It was a very stressful day but I am okay now. Just tired. Ready for a break.

[Lefty_Epee]

Really sorry to hear that the paranoia is rearing its ugly head. Glad to hear that you're doing well in general though! Have a nice day!

[Hidden in reply to Lefty_Epee]

Thank you so much!! You have a nice day as well!!

[mantis-toboggan]

I'm sorry you had that experience, panic attacks can be really scary. I'm glad you were able to get home safely though. I've had periods of time where I couldn't stay asleep as well, it can be really frustrating. Navigating stress/staying on top of mental health in college can be A LOT, so if you need to talk don't hesitate to post on here!

[Hidden in reply to mantis-toboggan]

it is a lot to handle but its okay.. we got this.. and I will try to post more often just been really busy with school and what not