Resting in Peace

[Saffron_Spice]

Folks, I am not looking for sympathy here but need to put an update on this forum. Some of you know my troubles with anxiety, depression and suicidal thoughts as of recent. I came home yesterday evening and, after not hearing a peep from her all day, I went to physically check on my roommate. Sadly I discovered she had passed away. She was 37, had her own struggles with anxiety, depression, and addiction, all of which she was recovering from and over the last month has been thriving. We think, as she had epilepsy since childhood, she had a fatal seizure. Some sort of drug OD is not ruled out yet as she was an IV user, but no drug paraphernalia was found so we are hoping, little solace as it may be, that she died clean and sober. We have been so proud of her recent improvement, progress, victory in that battle. If it is a factor in her death, than we love her just the same. Whatever the circumstances, she was way too young and full of life and it is simply heartbreaking.

It is an experience that has kept me in a little bit of shock, I think, since finding her and dealing with EMTs, police, and the coroner. Obviously to result in trauma issues for me would not be unreasonable. I do have complex PTSD and have had debilitating anxiety and depression over the last year, and have dealt with some suicidal ideations at times as a result. I will not make an attempt on my life, but am trying to process this and guess I just needed to post about it. I will talk with my therapist later today.

Thank you for listening, prayers for her and her family. Prayers for all of you for a lovely Sunday. 💜

[Hb2003]

Lots of hugs and support 🙏❤️- Hiba

[Saffron_Spice in reply to Hb2003]

Thank you dear. Shukraan. May God be with us. 🙂

[Hb2003 in reply to Saffron_Spice]

Your welcome❤️ 🙏🫂

[Niao]

I'm struggling to find the right words, but I am so very sorry. Awfully, awfully sad. Please take good care of yourself , this must have had a devastating affect on you. Sending you big virtual hugs and strength. x

[Arymretep]

I’m so sorry, what a shock for you, sending you love and the strength to deal with this, 🙏

[Hidden]

Oh my gosh, that has to be so hard to deal with!!!! I'm so sorry.

[Imaaan]

It must have been completely distressing and shocking to your system to have discovered the passing away of your roommate. I'm sorry that you had to experience that. Sending you a hug

[Rafiki11]

I am so sorry for your loss. What is your favorite memory of her?

[Saffron_Spice in reply to Rafiki11]

Just being goofy with her, on the couch watching TV. We got each other's sense of humor and laughed a lot.

[Rafiki11 in reply to Saffron_Spice]

I love that. I know you will miss her. Maybe watch a goofy show in her honor today?

[secrets22]

such terrible news,my thoughts and prayers for her family,and for you. Terribly hard to deal with.x

[kenster1]

god bless your dearest friend and she rest in eternal peace.sorry that you had to go through this.

[ongaku666]

Sorry for your loss. It is absolutely fine to speak about it here and to those who care about you. It will take some time to process and trigger some of your own anxieties and sadness. But the important thing is to allow yourself to grieve and experience all the emotions that death brings up, as we often think those negative emotions should be suppressed. Instead be kind to yourself and it's great you have a therapist to talk to. Life is a journey after all. Warm hugs xx