I was severely neglected as a child. Never cried as a baby. What's the point no is coming. When I got older & more self sufficient I kept to myself as nobody in the family wanted anything to do with me. That is until they needed a scapegoat. I was responsible for all the evils in the world. At the age of 14 I caused the gas shortage in the '70's. I didn't even drive!
Anyway I'm terribly insecure & need constant validation. That's my cross to bear. Thank you for all your wonderful & kind thoughts. I will cherish them.
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Pinkie56
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You did nothing wrong you are not the one who causes evil I know that deep in my heart I am so sorry that your family did this to you . Much kindness and support
Pinkie.. Wait a second. I thought I was the one responsible for all the bad in the world . At least that's how I was raised. Abusive alcoholic parents have a way of dumping their crap on everyone else especially their kids. I was expected to "set the example" for my younger sister. All the while trying to figure out what I'd done wrong ...
My sincerest sadness for what you have been through. This is a scenario I know all too well. The problems do continue, blaming oneself for all the evils in the world. Have lived that way my entire life. It is not that I blame myself but the uncomfortable feeling that I must have caused this overwelmed or that when that is how one is treated in early childhood and then it does not stop. Once one becomes the scapegoat, you assume that is your role, but the brain knows better, the nervous system is still reacting. they have these lie detectors but I always knew that these were often times not accurate for this very past history.
At least once you realize this, it is still difficult to calm the nervous system., On here with someone I messaged helped me stay true to myself. Once they were gone, I had to start again, but I still know better. Now I just feel sad. Once again, the rug is pulled out from under me to fend for myself.
Ten years ago a plumber fixed my sink but apparently put in the connections so tight, the new plumber today said it all needed to be replaced. I put out the cash or suffer no sink, No one takes responsibility for what they cause which leaves us wide open for taking it as if we were the cause, knowing different. bot
When that goes on for decades, one suffers even more, whicnot h is where I am today. It is so important to push back from blame of things that have nothing to do with you. Hope you get all the support you need on here from others.
Some people bury their own heads in the sand for the same reason you and I repress such attacks because we just did not understand., I just see it as just another lesson. I now pass ;lesson s on to anyone who asks for advice when a situation arises for someone else who is in peril. And that is exactly what it is, displaced peril, not of our making.
My heart goes out to you and wish you well. People sometimes just do not know what they do. the blame game is ongoing... I try to now not to carry it in my nervous system, but fail almost daily due to years of this false response to others untruths or their own need to blame otthers. It help because it recognize it so clearly most of the time. There was a book I read called Highly Sensitive People. She explained it better than I. Sorry for my length but it left me verbose after years of repression.
Thank you for sharing. It took me a long time but one day I had an epiphany. How could be the root of all evil and a loser at the same time? Gotta pick one. If I have the power to ruin your life that makes more powerful than you. So thank you for making responsible for so much. I must be pretty powerful. 💪
When I would voice my hurt at their treatment of me they always said the same thing "You're too sensitive." It took a long time to realize there is no such thing as "too sensitive". You feel what you feel. But knowing how sensitive I was why did they continue to be such bullies?
Highly Sensitive People helps to explain the gift you are to societ and how normal and necessary empathetic people have a more holistic view to the world. Great place to be as a human nowadays. Not sure it this fits you view, but it made sense to me when I read this years ago. To a point that if I am at a meeting and do not say anything, the staff would not leave a subject until they asked for my feedback, proving the necessity for my help in matters of dealing with a situation. It is a gift many are born with and some acquire over the years. Not sure it this will help if you can take time to read. I found it explaining these odd views of other folks toward my input without criticisms.
Sorry for your sad upbringing. What happened to you made you strong and built a defence mechanism which is good. I know you need people around you, we all do. Remember also, family is not only thru blood. You can find peopke who will love you for who you once you let down your guards. Be a fortified city but allow others in as well. As for needing validation there is nothing wrong with that. We all do sometimes but you are a good person, there is nothing wrong with you. Always know that.
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xx
Dream Interpretation (Long Post Sorry)
Just a hello 💛 and I’m sorry x
“SICK OF BEING SHAMED FOR BEING SICK”
Being a depressed extrovert
Sorry just doesn't cut it anymore
