Struggling with Self-Sabotage

[lilly1700]

Hello, it’s my first time writing on here. I have been struggling a lot with my mind recently and wanted to have some sort out outlet but mainly I sometimes need an outside source to tell me when my mind is working against me. I can find it hard to recognize my own self-sabotage as it is occurring.

Today I had a project deadline and planned plenty of time in my day for it but the second I sat down to start working I went into a depressive spiral ending with getting very little done and missing the deadline. After about 40 minutes of just staring at the computer feeling terrible I stopped trying to get anything done and went to my regular coping methods. I keep feeling guilty for abandoning my work. Should I feel this guilty? I felt at the time that I was not going to be productive anyways and that I needed to prioritize my mental health. But I can’t afford to do poorly at work right now either. I am struggling with what to prioritize. Thanks for listening.

[Hidden]

Hi and welcome! You should definitely not feel guilty for prioritizing yourself. I'm learning this too. And you are exactly right! Nobody can be productive when feeling so bad. Can you talk to your boss about this? Maybe he/she will have some ideas? Or, better yet, your therapist if you have one?

[lillyofthevalley37]

You seem to me to be doing your best so no reason to feel guilty , sometimes it is best to do the work even if you really don't feel like it . You need to find a method